History?
Lum. Â Nice to see you.
Really?
Of course not. Â Now, what have you to report?
We had a meeting today, History.  We’re going to fight the Primals.
Primals? Â What do you know about the Primals?
Not much.  I don’t know if anyone knows anything about them.  They get sum-
Summoned by the beast races, yes.  And each race has its own primal.  Titan for the Kobolds, Leviathan for the Sahagin, Ramuh for the Sylphs, Ifrit for the Amalj’aa-
You seem to know a lot about this, History.
Lum, I am a magitek artifact of the Garlean Empire whose only purpose is to absorb and store information. Â It is my business to know. Â The Garlean Empire has a campaign to destroy the Primals.
Really?
Wait.  No, I’m not sure.  Malfunction!  Malfunction…
Are you okay, History?
Rebooting.  Okay.  I’m fine now.  Tell me about the Primals, Lum.
Well, hardly anyone has faced them and lived. Â Almost everyone who meets them becomes their slave.
That’s a problem we’ve had, yes.
What?
Wait…I’m still rebooting.  How can you fight an enemy that enslaves each life it touches?
No one knows.  Mistress Loki and Master Caedmon are still doing research.  We’re planning to fight Ifrit first.
The Lord of the Inferno. Â Why him?
Isn’t he the weakest of the Primals?
Well, it depends on how you want to measure power. Â AND how much you like being burnt to a crispy, well-caramelized doneness.
I hope nobody gets caramelized…
So Loki and Caed are doing research?  That’s it?
We also have a plan to capture one of the Amalj’aa.  We’re going to ask him about Ifrit.
Not a bad plan at that. Â I guess you had nothing to do with it?
It wasn’t my plan, no.  I didn’t have much to add to the Primal debate.
Why not?
My logs are kept in confidence, History?
Complete confidence, Lum.
Then I’ll tell you.  I’m scared, History.
The threat of caramelization is frightening to everyone, but there’s the chance your crispy remains will make a feast at the next Amalj’aa picnic.
It’s more than that, History.  Everyone in the Night Blades is so brave.  They all pitch in and help out.  None of them seem worry about what might happen…who might get hurt…who might die.
And you?
I’ve seen blood and fire before.  Captain Daru and the 3rd battalion…they’re all dead, History.  All of them except me.  When everyone needed me most, when we were to make our stand, what did I do?
You ran, because you’re a coward.
What will everyone think when they find me out?
So avoid it, Lum.  Stay back at headquarters.  Tend to the wounded.  You’re a healer, aren’t you?  I’m sure you can find many ways to..ah…’comfort’ the soldiers.
It’s too late for that, History, I’ve already volunteered.
Whatever possessed you to do that?
Master Ellion and Mistress Loki need me.  It’s…well…I can’t say no to them.
Your motivations where this Ellion is concerned are hardly a mystery, Lum.  But I didn’t know you dabbled in women folk as well…
It’s not like that.  Ellion leads us.  He inspires.  He’s…when I look at him I know we can win.  We’ll succeed no matter what.  And Loki gives him strength.  She’s smart.  She’s the one who keeps us organized.
Yes, blah blah.  And legends will be sung of their greatness…the very heavens will shake with wonder at their glorious leadership…
Captain Daru could learn something from them.
SILENCE!  You didn’t know the Captain like I did!
He was a drunk, History.
A man with burdens like his NEEDS a few drinks to take the edge off.  You’re a deserter who left him and his men to die!  When the Night Blades need you, what will happen then?
I don’t know.
You’ll abandon them too, Lum.
You’ll abandon them too.
Lum. Â Nice to see you.
Really?
Of course not. Â Now, what have you to report?
We had a meeting today, History.  We’re going to fight the Primals.
Primals? Â What do you know about the Primals?
Not much.  I don’t know if anyone knows anything about them.  They get sum-
Summoned by the beast races, yes.  And each race has its own primal.  Titan for the Kobolds, Leviathan for the Sahagin, Ramuh for the Sylphs, Ifrit for the Amalj’aa-
You seem to know a lot about this, History.
Lum, I am a magitek artifact of the Garlean Empire whose only purpose is to absorb and store information. Â It is my business to know. Â The Garlean Empire has a campaign to destroy the Primals.
Really?
Wait.  No, I’m not sure.  Malfunction!  Malfunction…
Are you okay, History?
Rebooting.  Okay.  I’m fine now.  Tell me about the Primals, Lum.
Well, hardly anyone has faced them and lived. Â Almost everyone who meets them becomes their slave.
That’s a problem we’ve had, yes.
What?
Wait…I’m still rebooting.  How can you fight an enemy that enslaves each life it touches?
No one knows.  Mistress Loki and Master Caedmon are still doing research.  We’re planning to fight Ifrit first.
The Lord of the Inferno. Â Why him?
Isn’t he the weakest of the Primals?
Well, it depends on how you want to measure power. Â AND how much you like being burnt to a crispy, well-caramelized doneness.
I hope nobody gets caramelized…
So Loki and Caed are doing research?  That’s it?
We also have a plan to capture one of the Amalj’aa.  We’re going to ask him about Ifrit.
Not a bad plan at that. Â I guess you had nothing to do with it?
It wasn’t my plan, no.  I didn’t have much to add to the Primal debate.
Why not?
My logs are kept in confidence, History?
Complete confidence, Lum.
Then I’ll tell you.  I’m scared, History.
The threat of caramelization is frightening to everyone, but there’s the chance your crispy remains will make a feast at the next Amalj’aa picnic.
It’s more than that, History.  Everyone in the Night Blades is so brave.  They all pitch in and help out.  None of them seem worry about what might happen…who might get hurt…who might die.
And you?
I’ve seen blood and fire before.  Captain Daru and the 3rd battalion…they’re all dead, History.  All of them except me.  When everyone needed me most, when we were to make our stand, what did I do?
You ran, because you’re a coward.
What will everyone think when they find me out?
So avoid it, Lum.  Stay back at headquarters.  Tend to the wounded.  You’re a healer, aren’t you?  I’m sure you can find many ways to..ah…’comfort’ the soldiers.
It’s too late for that, History, I’ve already volunteered.
Whatever possessed you to do that?
Master Ellion and Mistress Loki need me.  It’s…well…I can’t say no to them.
Your motivations where this Ellion is concerned are hardly a mystery, Lum.  But I didn’t know you dabbled in women folk as well…
It’s not like that.  Ellion leads us.  He inspires.  He’s…when I look at him I know we can win.  We’ll succeed no matter what.  And Loki gives him strength.  She’s smart.  She’s the one who keeps us organized.
Yes, blah blah.  And legends will be sung of their greatness…the very heavens will shake with wonder at their glorious leadership…
Captain Daru could learn something from them.
SILENCE!  You didn’t know the Captain like I did!
He was a drunk, History.
A man with burdens like his NEEDS a few drinks to take the edge off.  You’re a deserter who left him and his men to die!  When the Night Blades need you, what will happen then?
I don’t know.
You’ll abandon them too, Lum.
You’ll abandon them too.