(( Edit: I need to clarify here... this did actually happen, entirely in character. I hope I was able to transfer the shear confusion over to this post. It was extremely fun, very chaotic, and completely fit the mood of the night. Whether Otto and Witchbane new it or not, they were holding Coatleque back from official business that night. ))
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Coatleque stood in the Quicksand, once again. Her back was to the front door as she listened to the three drone on in front of her, barely paying attention at this point. Something about pants... and possible coitus? It would have been amusing if not for the events already in motion this night. The bodyguard continued to argue, doing what she could to pressure the two to leave. Finally they began to relent as it was clear this discussion was not welcome around paying customers.
The girl, a blonde hyur, grumbled to herself with remarks of thieving merchants. "Fine! Outside it is then. If I'm not there in then minutes, start without me!". With that she crossed her arms in a pout and turned her back to continue her interrupted conversation with the man next to her.
The other man, bald, bearded, and half naked, stood there angrily tapping his foot and fuming at the guard. He pointed to her several times making his accusations. "You are coming with us!", he demanded.
The armored woman calmly shook her head now and grunted. "Not my jurisdiction." Pointing then to the Knight she said "Hers."
The man snapped back "Well, we'll just see about that tomorrow once I've consorted with Momodi!". With that he turned on his heels, and giving the Knight a scowl, continued out the door with a 'come hither' gesture. She watched him leave then turned back to the guard with her own scowl at having this dropped into her lap so suddenly. To make matters worse, the woman took up her harp witch had been cast aside, and began singing about bale merchants losing their wits (and their pants), while forced to walk like the poor do.
Still within earshot, the man came storming back. "You! Apprehend her, this instant!". The woman stopped her singing to laugh at the man. "Back already? Please... at least finish dressing yourself before you harass me again!". At this, his face turned three more shades of red within moments.
The Knight finally decided to speak up and defuse this situation. "Ma'am, please? I just need you to step outside for a moment so I can hear both sides of this."
The woman herself fumed, but set her harp down and made for the door. The man was close behind, with the Knight following after. The hot air of Thanalan's night did nothing to help tempers. As the three stood around the fountain, Coatleque quickly assessed the situation, then began her investigation. "Calmly now, please... I would like to hear the girl's side of these events. Ma'am, he claims you stole his... erm, pants?"
"And shoes! Together worth more than what most people in this city consdier a month's wage!"
"Ah... yes, and his shoes?"
"They were made by me in particular, too! She already admitted to selling my pants earlier, and as you can see she is wearing shoes too large for her own feet!"
The Knight sighed at his persistence and glanced down. Sure enough the woman was wearing what could only be a man's sized shoe.
"What more do you want to know? You see the evidence for yourself, Knight! Would you like to also investigate the depths of how she insulted me? Or how she impersonated a member of the Maelstrom? The men and women who mirror your selfsame status in Limsa Lominsa? Or perhaps I should explain how she left me... ME... in the middle of Thanalan!?"
Coatleque looked at the man incredulously. What was she doing here. How did she possibly get tangled in this, on tonight of all nights?
"Please, Ser, I would like her to speak. I believe you, verily, but your story may be colored by your anger right now."
"Indeed. She is lucky I haven't colored her FACE with my anger!"
The woman blushed innocently and looked away. "I-I don't know why this man claims I stole his stuff! Besides... he has gil enough to purchase more!" She looked down at his bare lower half. "Can he at least go buy something to wear NOW before we continue?"
Suddenly there was a buzzing in her ear.
"So... what happened to my plus one?"
"Sidetracked, apparently. Alexei? Or was it Crofte? Gods, I hate managing two conversations at once."
The man continued his ranting, snapping the Knight's attention back to the matter at hand. "Madam, I make my OWN clothing. I am a very Brand in this town!" "I didn't steal them! He gave them to me! And I had to sell them just to make my way here!" "I'm sorry? Ma'am, his affluence is not in question here..."
"This, this, this... harpee met me in the woods asking for directions."
"Ser? I'm sorry... so this apparent transaction took place on a previous night, alone, in a remote location?"
"There was no transaction!", he hissed. "Only lies and thievery! And it was earlier this very day!"
"What? You asked ME for directions, not me asking you for directions!"
More buzzing filled her ear, followed by the rustling of leaves.
"sounds like a good place to hit...."
"What was that?"
"Sorry. Vas busy. Am needed?"
The Knight shook her head. This was becoming more difficult to follow. She swallowed and tried to focus again on the facts.
"So you met earlier this day in a remote location, removed your pants, and she ran off with them?"
"I met her on the roads on my way here!"
"Kiryuu's saying we might have a location on Wolfsong."
"Fantastic."
Coatleque reached up with one hand and pinched the bridge of her nose with two fingers. A familiar ache was beginning to grow behind her eyes.
"Yes, the roads, very well. Still.. you removed your pants and she ran off with them?"
"He gave them to me!" The girl looked at the man in anger. "He wanted me for the night, but I refused. Yet he still gave them to me hoping for a second meeting!"
This was going nowhere. And now her time was being wasted...
"Alright... accusations of apparent affection aside... did you indeed give her the pants, Ser?"
"I did."
The mans expression glinted a hint of truth finally, only to turn back to its accusatory glare.
"At bow-point! I mean... sure I'd like to have her alright, but I'm a married man! I have no need for... loose women. She came to me under the pretense of being a simple Bard..."
"Belay the airship landing. If you're interested in singin' t'wolves, meet me at Scorpion's Crossing within the bell."
By all the hells, that was what she was waiting for. But she couldn't just turn and leave this situation now.
"Loose?!", the woman cried. "LOOSE!? You've never even been inside to be able to make such a comment! I should slap you, Ser!"
"Don't tempt me young woman to take you into a room and show you, its clear you get around wherever you come from"
"Mmmf... Ser, I care not for those details at this time.", the Knight said flatly. Turning to the woman and trying to regain control she asked "You held him at bowpoin?"
"Am to come?"
"Held? No! I use my bow for protection only. He's of an addled mind. Look at him. His stance is the only thing that's standing at attention! Why would I hold him at bow-point? And besides, I could do MUCH better than HIM if I were to take a man to bed!"
Now clearly distracted to those around her, Coatleque tugged upon her ear.
"My appologies. I am... delayed... looking for stolen... pants."
"...pfffffft. Alexei, if you're not otherwise occupied, yes."
"Da."
The two continued to bicker and argue until she could take no more.
"ENOUGH! Please... Ser...How much were these items worth?"
The man did some quick calculations while muttering to him self about materials and other expenses.
"About eighteenn thousand gil total. My brand fetches a high price in this city"
"Alright, Eighte... EIGHTEEN THOUSAND?"
"Yes indeed. A fair price to be sure, but I can certainly work you into something nice later at a discount if you arrest her right now."
"I told you this man was a thief! Look at the outrageous price he's trying to charge me.!"
She sighed. There was no more time for this. The Knight dug through her gil purse and managed to scrape enough together. She quickly counted out the sum of eighteen thousand gil for the man. "In the name of her Grace, Sultana Nanamo Ul'Namo, I hereby make restitution for this apparent theft of property."
"I'm on my way, after I find my plus one."
"Now, Ser, I would ask that you do not bait her further. Your debt is settled, and she is my responsibility going forward."
At this point another bystander quipped "Is this really how the Sultansworn do things now?"
"Alexei. Nat's here. Don't give anythin' away."
"Vill say nothing."
"Should follow?"
"Aye."
"Should keep distance or not?"
"Your call."
The bystander continued, "Well, you've gotten your gill now. Perhaps you should go and replace your pants now, even with something temporary."
"Maybe buy yourself a wit too..."
"Vhat is role?"
"Ace in the hole. If anything goes wrong..."
"Since she is your responsibility, perhaps you will consider sending her to work for me at my estate. I assure you she will be scrubbing and cleaning non-stop until she can repay this debt to her Grace."
"I will consider it. No promises."
"Vill keep distance."
Finally the man seemed to be calming down. He turned to the third and said "Yes young man I could use a new pair of pants the last ones we're a few days old"
Her business now concluded, the Knight gave the woman a quick salute.
"Ma'am"
"Y-yes?"
"Please take care of yourself."
"Yes, and thank you."
Tugging upon her earlobe again, the Knight was finally able to report in.
"Apologies for my temporary detainment...the problem is dealt with. Where do you need me, Ser?"
"Nice of you to join us, Crofte. Follow Alexei. Stay behind him a ways and watch our rear."
"Aye, Ser."
As the Knight turned and made her way to the Chocobo stables, she did not see the woman she just acquitted strolling away the opposite direction with the same bystander. She confidently tossed a gill bag into the air and caught it with her palm before pocketing the money.
"That BITCH stole my gil purse!"
----------------------
Coatleque stood in the Quicksand, once again. Her back was to the front door as she listened to the three drone on in front of her, barely paying attention at this point. Something about pants... and possible coitus? It would have been amusing if not for the events already in motion this night. The bodyguard continued to argue, doing what she could to pressure the two to leave. Finally they began to relent as it was clear this discussion was not welcome around paying customers.
The girl, a blonde hyur, grumbled to herself with remarks of thieving merchants. "Fine! Outside it is then. If I'm not there in then minutes, start without me!". With that she crossed her arms in a pout and turned her back to continue her interrupted conversation with the man next to her.
The other man, bald, bearded, and half naked, stood there angrily tapping his foot and fuming at the guard. He pointed to her several times making his accusations. "You are coming with us!", he demanded.
The armored woman calmly shook her head now and grunted. "Not my jurisdiction." Pointing then to the Knight she said "Hers."
The man snapped back "Well, we'll just see about that tomorrow once I've consorted with Momodi!". With that he turned on his heels, and giving the Knight a scowl, continued out the door with a 'come hither' gesture. She watched him leave then turned back to the guard with her own scowl at having this dropped into her lap so suddenly. To make matters worse, the woman took up her harp witch had been cast aside, and began singing about bale merchants losing their wits (and their pants), while forced to walk like the poor do.
Still within earshot, the man came storming back. "You! Apprehend her, this instant!". The woman stopped her singing to laugh at the man. "Back already? Please... at least finish dressing yourself before you harass me again!". At this, his face turned three more shades of red within moments.
The Knight finally decided to speak up and defuse this situation. "Ma'am, please? I just need you to step outside for a moment so I can hear both sides of this."
The woman herself fumed, but set her harp down and made for the door. The man was close behind, with the Knight following after. The hot air of Thanalan's night did nothing to help tempers. As the three stood around the fountain, Coatleque quickly assessed the situation, then began her investigation. "Calmly now, please... I would like to hear the girl's side of these events. Ma'am, he claims you stole his... erm, pants?"
"And shoes! Together worth more than what most people in this city consdier a month's wage!"
"Ah... yes, and his shoes?"
"They were made by me in particular, too! She already admitted to selling my pants earlier, and as you can see she is wearing shoes too large for her own feet!"
The Knight sighed at his persistence and glanced down. Sure enough the woman was wearing what could only be a man's sized shoe.
"What more do you want to know? You see the evidence for yourself, Knight! Would you like to also investigate the depths of how she insulted me? Or how she impersonated a member of the Maelstrom? The men and women who mirror your selfsame status in Limsa Lominsa? Or perhaps I should explain how she left me... ME... in the middle of Thanalan!?"
Coatleque looked at the man incredulously. What was she doing here. How did she possibly get tangled in this, on tonight of all nights?
"Please, Ser, I would like her to speak. I believe you, verily, but your story may be colored by your anger right now."
"Indeed. She is lucky I haven't colored her FACE with my anger!"
The woman blushed innocently and looked away. "I-I don't know why this man claims I stole his stuff! Besides... he has gil enough to purchase more!" She looked down at his bare lower half. "Can he at least go buy something to wear NOW before we continue?"
Suddenly there was a buzzing in her ear.
"So... what happened to my plus one?"
"Sidetracked, apparently. Alexei? Or was it Crofte? Gods, I hate managing two conversations at once."
The man continued his ranting, snapping the Knight's attention back to the matter at hand. "Madam, I make my OWN clothing. I am a very Brand in this town!" "I didn't steal them! He gave them to me! And I had to sell them just to make my way here!" "I'm sorry? Ma'am, his affluence is not in question here..."
"This, this, this... harpee met me in the woods asking for directions."
"Ser? I'm sorry... so this apparent transaction took place on a previous night, alone, in a remote location?"
"There was no transaction!", he hissed. "Only lies and thievery! And it was earlier this very day!"
"What? You asked ME for directions, not me asking you for directions!"
More buzzing filled her ear, followed by the rustling of leaves.
"sounds like a good place to hit...."
"What was that?"
"Sorry. Vas busy. Am needed?"
The Knight shook her head. This was becoming more difficult to follow. She swallowed and tried to focus again on the facts.
"So you met earlier this day in a remote location, removed your pants, and she ran off with them?"
"I met her on the roads on my way here!"
"Kiryuu's saying we might have a location on Wolfsong."
"Fantastic."
Coatleque reached up with one hand and pinched the bridge of her nose with two fingers. A familiar ache was beginning to grow behind her eyes.
"Yes, the roads, very well. Still.. you removed your pants and she ran off with them?"
"He gave them to me!" The girl looked at the man in anger. "He wanted me for the night, but I refused. Yet he still gave them to me hoping for a second meeting!"
This was going nowhere. And now her time was being wasted...
"Alright... accusations of apparent affection aside... did you indeed give her the pants, Ser?"
"I did."
The mans expression glinted a hint of truth finally, only to turn back to its accusatory glare.
"At bow-point! I mean... sure I'd like to have her alright, but I'm a married man! I have no need for... loose women. She came to me under the pretense of being a simple Bard..."
"Belay the airship landing. If you're interested in singin' t'wolves, meet me at Scorpion's Crossing within the bell."
By all the hells, that was what she was waiting for. But she couldn't just turn and leave this situation now.
"Loose?!", the woman cried. "LOOSE!? You've never even been inside to be able to make such a comment! I should slap you, Ser!"
"Don't tempt me young woman to take you into a room and show you, its clear you get around wherever you come from"
"Mmmf... Ser, I care not for those details at this time.", the Knight said flatly. Turning to the woman and trying to regain control she asked "You held him at bowpoin?"
"Am to come?"
"Held? No! I use my bow for protection only. He's of an addled mind. Look at him. His stance is the only thing that's standing at attention! Why would I hold him at bow-point? And besides, I could do MUCH better than HIM if I were to take a man to bed!"
Now clearly distracted to those around her, Coatleque tugged upon her ear.
"My appologies. I am... delayed... looking for stolen... pants."
"...pfffffft. Alexei, if you're not otherwise occupied, yes."
"Da."
The two continued to bicker and argue until she could take no more.
"ENOUGH! Please... Ser...How much were these items worth?"
The man did some quick calculations while muttering to him self about materials and other expenses.
"About eighteenn thousand gil total. My brand fetches a high price in this city"
"Alright, Eighte... EIGHTEEN THOUSAND?"
"Yes indeed. A fair price to be sure, but I can certainly work you into something nice later at a discount if you arrest her right now."
"I told you this man was a thief! Look at the outrageous price he's trying to charge me.!"
She sighed. There was no more time for this. The Knight dug through her gil purse and managed to scrape enough together. She quickly counted out the sum of eighteen thousand gil for the man. "In the name of her Grace, Sultana Nanamo Ul'Namo, I hereby make restitution for this apparent theft of property."
"I'm on my way, after I find my plus one."
"Now, Ser, I would ask that you do not bait her further. Your debt is settled, and she is my responsibility going forward."
At this point another bystander quipped "Is this really how the Sultansworn do things now?"
"Alexei. Nat's here. Don't give anythin' away."
"Vill say nothing."
"Should follow?"
"Aye."
"Should keep distance or not?"
"Your call."
The bystander continued, "Well, you've gotten your gill now. Perhaps you should go and replace your pants now, even with something temporary."
"Maybe buy yourself a wit too..."
"Vhat is role?"
"Ace in the hole. If anything goes wrong..."
"Since she is your responsibility, perhaps you will consider sending her to work for me at my estate. I assure you she will be scrubbing and cleaning non-stop until she can repay this debt to her Grace."
"I will consider it. No promises."
"Vill keep distance."
Finally the man seemed to be calming down. He turned to the third and said "Yes young man I could use a new pair of pants the last ones we're a few days old"
Her business now concluded, the Knight gave the woman a quick salute.
"Ma'am"
"Y-yes?"
"Please take care of yourself."
"Yes, and thank you."
Tugging upon her earlobe again, the Knight was finally able to report in.
"Apologies for my temporary detainment...the problem is dealt with. Where do you need me, Ser?"
"Nice of you to join us, Crofte. Follow Alexei. Stay behind him a ways and watch our rear."
"Aye, Ser."
As the Knight turned and made her way to the Chocobo stables, she did not see the woman she just acquitted strolling away the opposite direction with the same bystander. She confidently tossed a gill bag into the air and caught it with her palm before pocketing the money.
"That BITCH stole my gil purse!"
