Of Pasts and Presents

[Antain]

He shifted uncomfortably as she spoke. He's heard the words before, but he just couldn't agree with them. It did, however, reinforce that he had a skewed view of the world and still had a long way to go to think like everyone else.

 

He snapped back to reality at her questions, actually giving her a small smile. "My former Masters are no longer part of this world. Mostly. And unless you wish to make enimies from shooting a Godsbow Sergeant, there is nothing you can do."

 

"But thank you for your concern. I appreciate it, Lady Evangeline."

[111]

Evangeline shrugs, whether from bravado or foolishness, "I care not what enemies I might make in this life Vaughn. I could not live a life of idle safety as friend suffered."

 

She hands him back the smoking pistol, concern written on her face, "The fact that you can think back on your past with a smile and a calm voice worried me most of all. It is no weakness to admit your scars."

 

Looking up at the blue desert sky she pause for a few moments, then sighs, "Sorry."

 

"I'm doing it again. Trying to tell others how to live."

 

Exhaling she leans over the table, "How about you show me how to reload?"

[Antain]

"I only speak such a way that my scars do not become others'. Only Jaques knows, and has since been very protective." He smirks as he started cleaning the residue, moving slowly so Eva could follow. "Not that I mind, but I do not wish such a burden on anyone."

 

He nodded toward the metal pellets. "What about yourself? You mentioned once you were from Ishgard. It's odd finding one of their kind so far south."

[111]

Evangeline takes a free cloth, and begins polishing bit's of powder residue from her glasses.

 

"To live is to be a burden Vaughn." She smiles, "But I think you lift more than your weight, if the expression carries."

 

"As for Ishgard..." She makes a groaning grumbling noise, "I was exiled. You can call it youthful indiscretions. Call it a perfectly minor... very small, totally harmless, case of Heresy."

 

"I was training to become a barrister, for the high courts, I started off assisting a more senior member, interviewing the accused so we could defend them." She shrugs, "Or at least appear to. No one was actually interested in talking to the accused, or even cared what their stories may be. It was all for the display of justice."

 

Evangeline shrugs, "So I talked to them, learned their stories... and naturally I became curious. Ishgard has been locked in combat for so long, maybe it /was/ time for a change. Maybe the Heretics did know something we didn't. Eventually I actually went to the meetings, heard them speak, even Lady Iceheart herself. How they wanted to end the cycle, how they wanted peace and change..."

 

Evangeline re-seats her glasses, "And then I was found out. Only my family... and my experience defending others in such situations saved me from execution." She taps her cheek, "Instead I gained exile, and this fashionable brand. They were right though, in a way. Lady Iceheart was not interested in peace... the carnage at the steps of truth shows that."

 

She sighs, "Perhaps some day I'll be able to go back. We shall see how desperately Ishgard needs her daughters in the days ahead." She tilts her head, "You see I have a knack for annoying multiple governments."

 

"Perhaps in exchange for my tale... you can tell me how you obtained that pistol. Not these ones... the one you showed me before."

[Antain]

Vaughn thought for a moment. Perhaps a few moments. He contemplated how much information was necessary and how much respect he could stand to lose. Eying her closely, he finally responded, "They were the Captain's, but he doesn't need them anymore. A boring story, really."

 

He took another moment before making sure both pistols were loaded. "I've been to Ishgard once about eight cycles ago. Has it changed much? Like how Coerthas changed?"

[111]

Evangeline takes one of the pistols, holding it down range and examining the mechanism.

 

"Ishgard has grown... colder, much as Coerthas has." She shakes her head, "The changes in weather, and the aggression of the Dravanians and primals has set everyone on edge. The people believed they could trust no one, and that Ishgard had to stand alone. I hope at least that recent events have caused that icy disposition to thaw."

 

She fires off the shots slowly, bullets thudding into the wooden crate. She makes conversation between each shot, waiting for the clouds of smoke to clear.

 

"We shall need allies, in the days ahead."

 

She fires again.

 

"Captain you said? You spoke of that in the past. Your time on a ship." She turns with the empty pistol, "You never said exactly what that was though. I assume some sort of weapons officer? Or security? You're certainly skilled enough with weapons."

 

Evangeline grins, "Still, pistols like those? I don't think one would give them away casually. They seem the gift you would give a friend... or a lover."

[Antain]

He huffs a bit with a light smirk. "Cabin boy. I...took care of the Captain's needs until we reached port. Then..." He frowns, trying to morph the subject to the pistols, then finding he didn't want to talk about that either. Still, he knew Eva would just keep asking. She was just as stubborn as he was sometimes.

 

He smirked again. "I stole it, honestly. That pistol. The Captain...passed, so I took it and left the ship."

 

He tries to take the empty pistol from Eva to load. "So, you were a barrister? Why not do that here? There are many in Ul'dah who are not fortunate enough to have someone speak for them. Guilty or not."

[111]

Evangeline hands the pistol over, watching him work, "Cabin Boy...? So you did his laundry, kept the cabin clean and such? Sharpened his swords?" Ishgard's lack of a naval tradition prevents her from truly getting what Vaughn is saying. She grins, "Seems an exciting enough life for a young man. Open seas, strange ports, wind at your back."

 

"I bet you miss it at times."

 

Evangeline nods, "An interesting story for it then. If you were his assistant for so long, he'd probably want you to have it anyway."

 

"As for me...?" She cocks the second pistol aiming down the barrel, "I tried."

 

"The law in Ul'dah is different. All finance and contracts... and the one with more money always wins. I still do... small cases, here and there. Many of the refugees can't even read, let alone understand the contracts Monetarists can force them into. However it isn't my true calling."

 

She fires once, acrid smoke filling the air, "So Vaughn, I've never been to sea, aside from Ferry Rides. What was your favorite part?"

[Antain]

He chuckled at Eva's conclusions. She was so far off the mark, but it was a better story than the truth. At least it made him sound important.

 

He smiled as she told her adventures in bureaucracy, nodding in agreement with the hardships. When the topic focused back on him, he shrugged.

 

"Honestly, I couldn't tell you. I do miss it, yes, but if it were a less...hostile group, it may have been more enjoyable." He smirked. "Though, I had no call over my company at the time. All was chosen for me."

 

He thought for a moment before something that was nagging at him for some time finally made it to the forefront of his mind. "What was... what's childhood like in Ishgard? Or...anywhere, really."

[111]

Evangeline laughs, "Childhood...?" She fires again.

 

"It was likely the same as yours, or as most. More regimented of course, but pleasant enough." She smiles slightly, "Days spent playing in the Gardens of the upper spires, children's games. Warm hearths and cozy beds." She smirks, "And of course the classes, medicine, history, weapons, magic... though I was never very good at magic."

 

"It was cramped of course, and restricted. Especially after..." Her hands tightens on the pistol and she fires the last two shots off hurriedly, dark memories coming unbidden.

 

"After Nidhogg returned."

 

She clears her throat, "Those times were not so good."

 

Evangeline looks up at the clear sky and tries to regain her mood, "Other than that, a simple, happy childhood, same as yours, no doubt. Though not as exciting." She grins, "Do they have Cabin Girls as well? I've never heard of them."

[Antain]

He frowned at her answer. He had none of that, but nodded anyway. His mind wandered so he didn't hear most of it, until he was asked more about what a crew could have.

 

"Oh, I'm sure. The Captain was...superstitious though. They had no women on board. I... I was chosen specifically because I looked like one and..." He paused. "Well, I won't bore you further. How is the pistol feeling in your hand? You're getting better at aiming at least."

[111]

Evangeline chuckles, "No women? How strange. Might as well say no redheads, or darkeyes."

 

"Didn't seem to help him much though, forgive me for saying. Superstition can't hold back fate." She grins, "Oh? Actually, perhaps I figured it out. If the crew thought you looked like a woman, perhaps the gods and fates did as well. If only they had picked an uglier cabin boy, perhaps they would have been safer."

 

She hefts the pistol, "Yes, it's feeling more natural..." She turns to him, "Actually, have I ever told you? The reason I am so fixated on these?" Taking a deep breath the soothing scent of gunsmoke, "Bombs and guns, explosives and powder?"

[Antain]

Vaughn couldn't help but laugh at her conclusion. "Maybe..." It was ridiculous, but amusing nonetheless.

 

He tilted his head at her question. "No, you have not. I'd certainly like to know why you're so bent on destroying everything." He smirked, perhaps finding humor in the whole thing.

[111]

Evangeline sets the pistol down, and fingers a musket ball.

 

"Dragonscreams... their cries, we call them such, but it is not the truth. They are not sound... exactly. Often a dragon might wail, without even taking a breath, its mouth closed."

 

"The lesser ones, cry, it is true, but the larger ones roar, and it is... a force. A projection of their power, their dominance over my people. During Nidhogg's last assualt, I lay hunched in a shelter, carved into the rock of the city."

 

Images of trembling rock, huddled terrified children, and the stink of terror fill her mind. "Their roars and screams are not sound.. so rock did not stop them. Our ears and minds were full of them, their anger, their rage, their arrogance..."

 

Suddenly, the Elezen smiles, "Until of course, the cannons opened up. The roars of dragons, met by the shuddering cracks of the sky piercers and berthas. It was the only way I knew the battle was not lost. If the cannons had stopped, and the screams continued, It would mean the city was soon to fall."

 

Evangeline begins loading the pistol as well, copying Vaughn's movements, "But it did not, and I remember that noise. The boom and crash of resistance..."

 

"Since then, that's what they've represent to me." She continues to grin as she tamps down a musket ball, "The power to destroy demons."

 

"And to survive the night."

 

She laughs, "All a bit foolish isn't it? Still, I find them romantic all the same."

[Antain]

He smiled slightly, but didn't return the sentiment. "A cannon destroys. It doesn't matter at what it's pointed. There is no coming back from the damage. You may rebuild, but it's never the same. The cracks are still there. The memories of those lost in the wreckage. You may point it at your demons, but it's the thousands of people in between that feel the pain."

 

His mind wandered, his face frowning at what it remembered. "Lady Evangeline... I pray you don't become consumed by cannon fire. That you remember there are people who care about you and don't want to see you descend into madness."

[111]

Evangeline smiles, "There I think we disagree Vaughn. Ishgard lies with its cannons pointing outwards, not inwards. Being on a ship... I can see how you would have had a different experience."

 

"As for the wreckage, I can only say the Dravanians would do far more, if they were not stopped. I have no no intention of growing any madder than I already am."

 

She chuckles, checking over her loading job, "Someday you might even thank me for my passion."

 

"Anyway Vaughn. For all my bravado... I do care as well. I just sometimes have difficulty showing as much."

[Antain]

"Intention has nothing to do with it." He sighed. "But...You're right. I have had a much different experience than you. I cannot see a cannon and not think death and destruction. I cannot see children and wonder if they'll be Masters or slaves."

 

He thought a moment. "I have been betrayed and misguided most of my life. Even those I thought were trustworthy, and ideas I thought were truth...they were not what they seemed." He smiled slightly. "In that same token, while I have my doubts about some of your...motives, I do hope you prove me wrong."

[111]

Evangeline nods as she listens, drumming her fingers on the table. "I cannot help restore your faith in the world Vaughn. Wounds are more easily created than mended."

 

"However I do not intend to let this world break me."

 

She grins wryly, "People laugh at me, you know. Throw stones, point and jeer, dismiss me as crazy. Yet I believe what I believe all the same. No child should grow up to be a slave, and all should be their own masters."

 

"As for betraying you Vaughn? What would I gain from such a thing?" She laughs, "Someday you'll realize there are people around you willing to follow you to the ends of the earth."

 

"I know you won't believe me Vaughn, but I don't see you as one to be misled and deceived. I see you as one to lead others. To break their shackles, to open their eyes, to salve their wounds."

 

Evangeline smiles, "Let us hope my chosen path allows me to live long enough to see it. Though in truth... I think you've already started."