Words Never Spoken

[Yayoi Dejiki]

Journal for https://wiki.ffxiv-roleplayers.com/pages/Yayoi_Dejiki

 

Hidden somewhere in Sree's room at the Rising Sun, this green journal is property of Yayoi Dejiki and contains her unfiltered thoughts, feelings and dreams. Though each entry may be written in common or Doman, her hand writing is always flawless.

[Yayoi Dejiki]

Sree has given me a journal.

 

 

    It's probably the first thing anyone has given me in a very long time, and I suppose I should explain how I got it, and how I met her.  The slavers were after me again. I had just lifted some guy's purse on Hustings strip when i saw the House colors. Idiots, they clearly know nothing of blending in.

 

 

    Still, they had me trapped in the alleyway. Luckily I never travel alone! I gave a whistle, and as he always does, Cookies came running. My Chocobo partner tore into them with beak and claw, and I did what i could throwing rocks and such. I've learned better then to try and help him fight. My lack of training and no real weapons, i tend to just get in his way. 

 

 

    There were to many for him, and we both knew that, but we also knew he could escape at any time. There's no man alive that an out run a wild chocobo! All he needed was to give me time to escape, so I made my way, dashing across the city through alleyways and side streets. I somehow ended up in the Goblet when one of them surprised me from out of no where. I could feel his knife scrape across my rib bone as it slid into me. I fell from the overpass into a courtyard below, crawling to the door.

 

 

     That is when they came out to see what the commotion was. The Ascendant Dawn, they are called. A group of adventurers it seems. They chased off my attacker and healed my wounds. It took them awhile to understand that i couldn't speak, but in the end one named Sree offered to watch over me while I rest and gave me a spot to lay.  I recovered quickly with their help, but I couldn't just.. owe them. I had to find a way to pay them back, so I asked to help them.

 

 

      The tall hyur woman, the one with the large feather... told me no. They don't deal with thieves and youngsters. Their leader, however, was willing to give me a chance. If I can find a way to be useful to them, I can join them. Be a real adventurer, get paid real coin and have a home and food every night. It seems like a dream. 

 

 

       But how does a street thief help a group of warriors?

[Yayoi Dejiki]

    I've started communicating with my new friends through the parchment I stole awhile back. I can concentrate on it rather hard and it will form writing for a brief time, but its always very draining and tends to write what i'm thinking rather then what I want written, leading to a few embarrassing moments.

 

 

    I've.. not been completely honest with them. I play innocent and naive, because it feels better and avoids painful memories and questions. I let them think i'm a silly child, and in truth, i enjoy playing the part.

 

 

    It seems this group trains a rather large amount. They have a secret sub group they call 'Shinobi' that fight with athletics, daggers and shadow. These Shinobi are very impressive, and they all answer to Miyo, the Shinobi leader. While sitting outside, I saw what looked like someone trying to spy on us and I thought I had found my chance to prove myself... so I attacked.

 

 

    It was clear rather quickly that the person was one of these Shinobi, she was quick and skilled. I thought I could get the upper hand using my favorate distraction, so I reached into my pocket and pulled out one of my trusty cookies, hurling it at her like a weapon. I just needed to distract her for an instant to make my attack.

 

 

    It didn't work. The cookie bounces off her without so much as a flinch and she starts laughing. I got so angry and tried to hit her, and all of a sudden she was throwing fire at me! A cat person, throwing fire! She had to be part dragon or something! I was hocked and started referring to her as 'Dragon-kitty.'

 

 

   Well, i guess not. These Shinobi can use magic with their hands somehow, still, I like the name, I think it will be her new nickname!

[Yayoi Dejiki]

This entry has random spots of water discoloration, hinting that the girl may have been crying when she wrote it.

 

I'm just a thief, It's silly to think I could be useful to these people. 

 

 

I wanted to get some real equipment. Weapons, armor, anything that might make me useful, and in truth, I was rather hungry for something more then the fists full of food I occasionally sneak from the kitchens at the Quicksands. I went to my favorite spot and found a nice mark.

 

 

She turned out to be faster then I thought. She caught me. She was talking to me, trying to find out who I was and what I was doing and once again I attempted to deploy my favorite distraction, crumbling up a cookie in my pocket and hurling the crumbs towards her. They bounced harmlessly off her mask. I suppose i should have thought of that.

 

 

Then... for no reason at all, her own friend walks up to her, picks up a hand full of sand, and says, 'Will that mask block this too?' and hurls it in her face.. blinding her. Wait.. what? Yeah. I took that moment to run as fast as my feet could carry me. 

 

 

Her friend found me later though. He tried to say he wanted to teach me new tricks to escape. I wont fall for that. I showed him the card, 'Shinobi will teach me escape tricks!'

 

 

That seemed to shock him. He knew what a shinobi was, and he wanted to meet them. I brought him to Miyo, but that may have been a mistake. He told the story of how we met, and Mei... "Dragon Kitty", got upset. We had been getting along well, i think, maybe even friends, but hearing that I was stealing angered her. She yelled at me for being a thief and taking things. It caused a big argument with her and Miyo.

 

 

Miyo told her to teach me about the Shinobi, but she refused. I had been excited about learning to be a shinobi. The idea is almost perfect! I could help the Dawn and be really strong!

 

 

Karien thought it was a good idea to. She told Mei to teach me, and Mei said no again.

 

 

I think... I think Mei doesn't think a thief is good enough to be a shinobi. Yayoi is just a common criminal and not good enough to join them. It.. I mean... I really wanted to, but if Mei doesn't think I should, then i wont make her. Maybe she's right.

 

 

 

 

I'll try to find some other way to help the Dawn.

[Yayoi Dejiki]

Its taken some time, but me and Mei finally seemed to work things out. Miyo and Mei started teaching me the arts of the Shinobi. Its very complicated but i'm a fast learner. Perhaps to fast. They were very suspicious with how quick I was learning some things, so i had to intentionally start stumbling and messing things up.

I guess i was just so excited to learn, i forgot to -be- Yayoi. Of course a cookie happy teenager wouldn't understand Mudra's so quickly. Ugh. In the end i passed it off as being 'related to sign language', as why i was good at it. Hopefully they bought that.

A lot of new people have been around the Rising Sun recently.

Lexi seems to be a knight of some kind. She works for a noble woman or something. She's very tall, and beautiful and lots of armor. She also looks like she needs a cookie, badly. Always so Grrr and Arrgg. She looks like the type of person who would slam her axe down on the table and shout , "TONIGHT I WILL BATHE IN THE BLOOD OF MY ENEMIES, AND ALSO CAN YOU PLEASE PASS THE KETCHUP!" I've decided to call her Grumpy.

Chinua... well.. she's beautiful, and smart. She's also very aloof with me. She doesn't like my hugs, and often wont take the cookies I offer her. I'm not sure if i did something to offend her, or that is just how she always is. I heard someone say she was a lawyer, and I think i heard someone else say she needed a doctor. I hope she's okay. I call her No-hug friend for now. Maybe that will change.

Sialia is much different. She's openly friendly with me and seems to be a great person. I hear she's a healer of some skill both with and without magic. She, however, reacts very badly to being touched. I recognize it, remember it. After years of being touched and forced to touch against my will, i see the signs in her. The first time she pulled away I almost cried. Not because she didn't want my hug, but because I've been where she is, and i remembered what it felt like to have someone touch me without asking. I was so ashamed I did that to her. She can never learn my nickname for her, Sister. I will look out for her and protect her, and gods help anyone who would ever touch her again without her approval, because they will need all the help they can get when I come for them.

R'aili is.. strange. She doesn't seem to understand some of the things Yayoi does, but she's always polite and respectful. Perhaps she's suffered some trauma of her own that makes her emotions a little harder to reach. I'm not sure if i should try extra hard to break through, or give her the peace and distance she may want. She is Hollowed, though i wont say it to her face. Maybe in time something or someone will help her find that missing piece inside.

Then there is Eona. She's beautiful, and rich, and kinda scary. Absolutely nice and friendly, yet very materialistic. She's dating Mamo, one of my best friends. Thats odd, isn't it. Me who can't stand men, who runs and hides from them, has a best friend who's a man. He's different though, and Eona seems to make him very happy. She's possessive when it comes to physical things, but not people, and I've heard a rumor that she carries a big bomb everywhere she goes, so that if she ever dies, everyone near by dies with her. That is.. kinda scary. Yayoi calls her Shineygirl.

Oh! Its almost time for practice. Got to go!

[Yayoi Dejiki]

Oh gods, what did I do.

I think I made a mistake. My disguise is safety, it is security. It is -life-. But.. I have been so lonely, and She has been so nice to me. For Starfall... I ... I took it off. I wiped off the paint that makes me look young and took the padding out of the clothes so that I didn't look like a curve-less stick. And then I kissed her.

I kissed her pretty aggressively. I thought I would pull her into her bedroom and completely blow her mind. Truth is, its been so long since I've used any of my training that I just froze up. She took the lead, she probably still thinks i'm an innocent deep down. Maybe that is a good thing, maybe part of my disguise is still in tact. I don't think she would tell anyone, but if she did, if they found me again, i'd have to run away.

I don't want to go. I love the Dawn, its my family, my home.

She got fairly aggressive herself, told me I was her's, I belonged to her. It raised the hair on my arms, and not in a good way. I tried to explain to her, to tell her. I swore i'd never be a slave again, I swore it in the blood of the 'Master' who lay dying atop me with my teeth in his neck.

Its okay, as long as its a game. I can play, I can pretend.

But Yayoi will NEVER be a slave again.

[Yayoi Dejiki]

My family is broken.

I don't know what happened. All I know is people are leaving, people are gone. People i love on both sides of this divide. Every time i try to fix it, things seem to get worse. No one will talk to me, they all think i'm a little girl and can't help.

Lexi had been getting better. I think it was because she was in love with that tall woman. They were together and all was happy. I even started calling her Lady-knight instead of Grumpy.

Chinua seemed to be getting better towards me. She occasionally allowed a hug and even ate a cookie or two now and then!

Sialia seemed to be getting more comfortable around people, and R'aili was rumored to be in love. Everything was perfect.

Then I wake up one morning, and they are all gone.

For the second time in my life, my family was ripped in two. I couldn't take it. I hid for several days, crying and feeling sorry for myself. but that is not the way of the shinobi! I will use my training. Eona knows them well, i will follow her, I will find them and watch over them from a distance, until i see the chance to bring them back home. I will fix my family.

[Yayoi Dejiki]

Explaining how innocent little Yayoi shows up in dangerous situations to try to help was getting tiresome, so I created a secret identity. A mysterious and quiet ninja girl who appears in times of trouble, and vanishes after quelling the chaos! This should help me move among my family without arousing suspicions that Yayoi isn't all she appears to be. At this point... I know i could trust most of them, but there are one or two who like to use secrets to hurt people when they are upset. They don't mean to do it, they don't want to really cause problems, but they lash out in anger and then, oops, to late. Those people can never know.

 

I've jokingly called this other me 'Shinobi-gurl' and she seems to be a hit. People like her. She shows up, helps however she can and then is gone in the quiet moments when she's no longer needed.  

 

Sleeping in Fel-fel's tree-house has become rather comfortable to me. Its beautiful laying under the stars and hearing the sounds of night. When it rains, I just curl near the trunk and pull the sleeping bag up over my head and its back to sleep. This really is the life. Freedom.

[Yayoi Dejiki]

So, I have a friend. Her name is Dree. She's excitable and strange, but also a genius. Not everyone seems to think so, because of the way she expresses herself, but the things she can do are truly amazing. She seems to know just about everything, and can make the most wonderful potions and inventions.

 

She's part of the group that left, and is a little hard to keep up with these days, but I've been supplying her with any extra alchemist, technological or explosive items I come across in my travels. She really seems to appreciate it, and she's wonderfully fun to be around. She's like Yayoi, only she isn't faking it. It must be really nice to actually feel that way, to see the world that way. I really wish i could.

 

Sree scared me a bit today. She was talking to a woman on the beach, and then just.. randomly lit her henchman on fire. I was shocked and asked her why she would do such a thing. 'Because he's a criminal.'  Wait.. but.. i'm a criminal. I mean, I'm a thief, she knows that. Had she suddenly turned very goodie-goodie? I immediately threw down a smoke pellet and started to run. I didn't know where to go, i just had to leave before she set me on fire too! I've seen her suddenly change attitude before, but never that dramatic. 

 

I went the only place i could think of, where i would feel safe. My tree-house. Of course she knew to look for me there. She called me down and told me that he wasn't a normal criminal, he was a slaver.

 

Well, that changes everything, of course. You pour the curelium, i'll hold the torch. Then some other Xaela shows up, demanding to know why Sree attacked him as well. Sree called her 'Nuke'. Apparently this 'Nuke' works for the guys boss, and is somehow a friend of Srees. Well, friend or not, she had to die. I was going to take care of it for Sree, no trouble at all, as thanks for all the things she's done for me.  For some reason.. she stopped me. Ugh. Fine. I went back to my tree-house for a nap. But don't worry 'Nuke', you'll get yours.

[Yayoi Dejiki]

No one tells Yayoi anything. This is not new information, and because of it, i've learned to simply keep an eye on -everything- myself. So when a group of strong fighters from both Venture and the Dawn started gathering together, I knew something was going down. Of course, they wouldn't invite little Yayoi into a dangerous mission.

 

Shinobi-gurl time.

 

I followed them from the shadows and snuck onto Eona's airship. Add stowaway to my list of crimes, i guess. It was a wild ride, including getting blasted out of the sky. I landed a bit away from the rest of the group, and it took me a moment to find them again. When I did, they were fighting some kinda.. magitek blended mix of humans, monsters and machines. 

 

All lead by Nuke. Well, finally. Say thank you for gifts dropped in your lap, I always say! scouted the battle out, slipped into position on a rock shelf just above them, and when the time was right, Shinobi-gurl descended from on high in a blaze of steel! It was -awesome-! I tore into one of the beasts and shocked everyone. 

 

Then Nuke broke rule one. She touched Sialia. She HIT Sialia with her weapon! That.. I shifted mid step and hurled a Shiruken at her as i closed in for the kill. It wasn't going to be quick and easy this time, i was going to make it hurt. I was going to make her suffer.

 

"YAYOI! we are here to rescue her!"  Wait.. what? Karien, the leader of the Dawn, and a really good person, wanted this slaver filth to live? And did she just call me Yayoi?!

 

I mean, I guess it was kinda silly to think that two mute, Raen girls who speak hand-signals might run in the exact same circles. Its not like there are entire clans of us.  Ohhh. unless... Maybe! Maybe I can convince them there is an entire Clan Dijinki that only speaks in... no, that's silly. Oh well. Anyway, back to the fight.

 

They wanted the stupid Nuke slaver girl to be rescued? First of all, she didn't look in need of rescue when she's slapping people around with a spear and commanding giant monsters with guns for arms. Second, she works for a slaver. Don't they understand? Do they have any idea the things they do to us?! Not just the things you'll never speak about, never say aloud... but the things they do just to break you. Just to remind you that your not even a person anymore. Its a fun game to them, to invent new ways to prove your less then furniture.

 

But I can't disobey Karien. So I stop. Seme pushes Nuke out of the way and my shiruken hits the wrong target in the back. Nuke lives. Then her Boss shows up. Finally, a slaver I can kill.  Seeing her made me shake, and i screamed everything i had at her, which of course, made no sound at all. I reached for my daggers.. and was told to retreat. Yeah, we ran away. We let her live too.

 

When we got back home, everyone was all hugging and crying and telling the little slaver girl she'd be okay. I just shook my head and went back to my tree-house. I could still hear them though. They actually talked about 'hunting the ninja.'   Really? Well, Like i said, say thank you for small gifts. Come hunt a shinobi. Maybe this will end exactly as it should after all.