...And A Protector's Will

[Star Lin]

(ooc: Doing something slightly different with this story.  It will be set up in journal form for John.  Just a little short piece at the moment.)

 

The book is fairly new, though there looks to be some pages torn out of it, and a couple of smudges of charcoal along the edge of it.  The first entry is shakey, as if the writer's hand couldn't stay still.

 

 

I guess Tanya is right that I have the best and worst luck in the world.  Titor has also told me that I didn't need to do what I did but well, hindsight is 20/20 as they say, and I didn't think of the danger that could come from something that wasn't the void.

 

I went to the Invisible City to field test the magiteck visor that Titor had made for me.  Yet, instead of a ruin city with voidsent, I found the site of a great battle, and the bodies of several slain voidsent.  After testing the vibration of the aether around the city, I found what appear to be wards around it.  It was as I was going up the path that lead to the other end of Golden Bazaar, that I meet a hyur woman coming from that direction.

 

Lady Vi Lindon is her name and very strong in the way of thaumaturgy.  She also knew Sir Khyran.  I was thrill over the fact that their seem to be someone else that would be able to make sure that he was all right.  I explain a little bit about why I was wandering around the Invisible City.  I'm not sure what I did after that but she asked me to do her a favorite.  When I agree, she asked me to remove my gloves.

 

I fear that Sir Shin will be upset if he finds out that I refused for the simple fact that I did not trust the walls around my heart to hold.  This lead to her using a sleep spell on me and then I found myself 'Dreaming' her memories.  She must have realize something was wrong because the 'Dream' did not last long and I found myself back in my body, with Lady Vi refusing to look at me and handing over my gloves.  It was not long after that whatever was causing the issue with my linkpearl to get my position out to Mahv and Lady Canny.

 

There was almost blood drawn and it took me a bit to get Lady Canny to not attack her.  She was protecting her people after all, though I wish I knew what I must have done to make her think I was a threat.  As for the issue with the linkpearl, Mahv's idea was that it was the visor might have cause it was wrong.  When I spoke to Titor he said that it should have cause the interference.  It turn out that it is a wire that was broke.  He is fixing it for me but also asked if Khyran's group should be investigate.  I do not believe that they are a group of evil but that I saw with the Wards might come in handy with us, in case with have another voidsent like the Siren again.  I will try to get back to the bazaar the next day to see if I can talk to Sir Khyran.

 

Now, if only I could understand why there has been a slight tenseness in the aether today.  Maybe a storm is coming or Odin might be going to pop up again.

[Star Lin]

I haven't written in this for a while, not for lack of trying.  Has it really been two weeks now, since the Garleans kidnapped us?  I try to bury the memories of what happen but they still well up in my dreams.  It still hurts that they took Kit even though I have her back now.  I hear her scream sometimes while she 'sleeps', dreams of her being trap in her book, and it makes me fear for her even more.

 

Dad, he was not happy when I came too and he found out why I and the others were kidnapped.  The room grew so cold from his anger, and he has been wanting me to leave the group and not risk myself again.  I want to keep helping to continue my research into White Magic.  There is so much I wish to do for Eozera but how much of myself am I willing to lose, especially with Titor's *the words are scratched out but the words addiction and Ceruleum could just be made out*.  I'm not sure how to help him or if I have the strength to do so.

 

The work with Khyran and Aethertide has help to distracted me from what has happen.  I'm still preparing the rights for Sir Connor's father and Lady Amaya will be offering prayer to the spirits so I hope that his soul finds peace even after what he did because of his grief.  I can only hope that this will bring peace to Sir Connor as well.  I made sure to leave the paint supply and ink & quill set for the little one with Khyran.  I plan on stopping by later this week to see how well she remembers her letters and numbers.  Perhaps Ser Bride will have been able to express her feeling to Khyran as well, since she adores him so.

 

Gindstone was last night but I was running late because of the branch meeting with Aethertide.  I heal for Aoi at the Wash area and it went very well.  But my greatest joy was finding Howl at the Stone.  It has been so long since I have seen him but I understand that we both our have been busy of late.  I'm just glad that he was there, even if.

 

He asked me if the danger I had felt had come to pass.  I knew I could lie to him, as I'm sure Warren had seen the paper about the kidnapping and would have told him.  He was anger because I had promise to call for help and I did not.  I told him that they didn't give me quarters to call before they were on me.  I wasn't going to say anything more, mostly because I didn't want to remember but he ask and I can not say no.  I buried my face into his neck in much the same way that Kit had buried her own into my neck.  I spill everything about the fight and then, and then I had to tell him about them taking Kit from me.

 

I wanted to cry, to scream, but I couldn't.  Not there, not when it would attracted attention away from the combatants and on to me.  I also didn't want Howl to become more angry then he was.  I told him to I wanted to better at protecting myself so I wouldn't have to face something like that again.  He said that I wasn't alone and that I didn't have to face it on my own.  It was very much what Khyran told me after the fight with Sir Connor's father and the group he had gather.

 

I will try to believe it from now on.

 

(ooc: for those that wish to read the Kidnappings and Rescue RP.  I'll post the links for the Kidnappings here and The Rescue here.)

[Star Lin]

I'm ashamed that I was planning to sneak out from the house before any of them was aware that I had been there at the Dusk.  I guess it was probably good that was more exhausted then I thought.  Warren must have found my pack on the stairs when I came down.  I'm not sure how long he had been there when he woke me.  I guess, it was those moments when I could have lied but Warren probably would have saw through it so I told him the truth.  The rumors among the guards, how I wasn't feeling as if I wasn't doing any good, and that I no longer felt like I was connecting with any of them.  Even now, it still hurts, knowing that I fail in something I wanted to do, something that my sister has done for Eorzea.

 

I stay there for the rest of that night into late afternoon before I finally slip back to Ul'dah with my tail between my legs.  Sam was there when I walk into the home and I admit I wasn't sure why he was there, til I saw the transfer papers in his hand.  Thaliak's grace, he tried not to look it but I could see the 'I told you so' in his eyes.  I'm not sure how long I cried again how many more tears I will shed before the hurting stops.

 

At least being in Ul'dah full time with allow me to check in on Joy more.  I've been wanting to work with her math skill a little more.  It was also good to be back in the clinic more now, though today was and 'odd' day.  A couple of miners decided to brag over drinks and that lead to a fist fight, which lead to them being ship off to our clinic.  I probably shouldn't have been standing over the highlander when he woke up because his fist ended up meeting my head.  I remember a wave of anger, Pick's voice in my head, and then Mom was looking at me with concern as she was healing the knot on my head.

 

I look down trying to figure out why the ground was moving under me and I was startle to find the highlander out cold and that I was sitting on top of him, one of my daggers in my hand.  I panic and was hiding when the Brass Blade came to haul the highlander off.  Mom gave a full statement, and omitted how I used the handle of the dagger to knock him out.  I'm not sure what is happening to me but it seems to have started since I used Pick's memories to not be John when I attend Khyran's trial.  Maybe it just stress still playing havoc with me, especially with how I got back to Ul'dah after I went to the meeting last night.  I'm not going to mention what happen at the clinic to Warren and the others.  They would worry over something that has been clear up already.

[Star Lin]

Has it really been so long since I last wrote in this. I guess life and having a couple of other souls in you can make time fly. Ugh, that probably not as funny as I wish it could be. I still miss Howl's presence greatly and it worries me that his room is empty. I try not to ask for fear of what Warren will say if I ask were Howl is and I feel horrible enough that I had not realize that he is gone. I can't use the excuse for being busy, as his best friend, I should have realize, known that something was wrong. I feel that I fail him in some way and I do not know how to make it right.

 

As for why I'm still in the infirmary and not heading for the 'Sisters' meeting yet. I had to use my 'gift' to help Sizha, though it concern me that Sizha seem to also have dream as well. Perhaps his mind and Sizha'to own presence was what pull him into it as well. To relieve Calamity again but through another's eyes has cause my own heart and the aetherical wound there to ache from my sister's death. It also hurt that I could not 'stop' their parents death, though I know that is not how my gift works. I can only observe what takes place and gleam insight on how to help the person to deal with it.

 

Sizha'to was right, the anger and hate that was infection the memories had to be lance open, even it it hurt Sizha to remember what he and his brother said to each other out of pain and anger from their parents death. I can only hope that he can start to heal now and that Sizha'to and I can make him realize he truly hadn't meant it. I'm sure once we find his brother, the true healing begin, for all 'three' of them.

 

Sizha'to, he is my greatest concern right now. Though he is the other half of Sizha he is his own persona as well. I see one of two things happening when Sizha starts to heal. He will either fight to remain himself, which would hurt both of them, and though they are two half of the same soul.... *writing trails off as if he left in a hurry*

 

Sorry, was almost late for the Sisters meeting which didn't take place. I'm settle on the step outside so I can finish up this. As I was writing earlier, though Sizha'to and Sizha are two side of the same Gil, Sizha'to is too form for them to truly to fit back together. I don't have a problem with it as Sizha'to seem not to wish to cause harm. The others might have to be brought more gentle around to him. I just hope that Khy doesn't try to push to get rid of him as that could cause damage as well. My worry is that Sizha'to may feel that he isn't needed or wanted and try to rejoin with Sizha. Once again, this could be a problem with Sizha'to is to form to fit back into Sizha's personality.

 

If nothing else, the two will know that they have an ally with me. The first thing I'll do while the two are healing from the wound that I lance, I'll head for the Shroud and start making inquiries about Sizha's brother. I can only hope that someone will remember the two brothers and might give me a clue as to where G'azierth might be, and well, I might also luck out with word on someone that might have saw a blond Sunseeker as well.

 

As for the other thing that I going to write about, Sam was able to find Micky's notes and well, Dad isn't happy with the whole lot of us. From what he was able to translate from the changes that Micky himself did to it. It was a spell that was was to cascade through the members of the group, with one death leading to the others dying right after, releasing their aether in a way to rip open a void gate. I don't blame Dad for being mad, Sam was just as upset about it as well. But it seem that Micky realize that something was odd about the spell and change it enough that our aether would be release back into the lifestream.

 

Dad's concern is that when we didn't die at the moment that Micky did, that either the 'person' that lead Micky to the spell thought that there wasn't enough aether to cause the cascade effect or that we were better able to handle the extra amount of aether in us. Dad thinks now that the others deaths might not have been accidents. And I could tell that something happen when Sam went after the book because Ax is staying far too close and I can see the damage done to the edge of his ax as well. It does seem that the way to break it is to have a willing sacrifice but I know how that may turn out...if we even see that attack coming. Dad is going to work on a better counter spell to beak it without either of us willingly throwing our lives away for the other. I fear that we might now have a choice in the matter.

 

We'll handle it, like we always done. I'm not going to get the others hurt because of what we did when we were all too young and stupid to realize the dangers that this joining spell would cause. I and Sam don't want our deaths to cause more harm.

[Star Lin]

(ooc: Another quick post, because I completely forgot to put anything down about Ruran's and John's meeting)

 

I'm seem to be forgetful today. I forgot to write down my meeting a strange Hyur a few days ago. Mom and I had just finish a small clinic for the people in the Silver Bazaar, to care for any injuries or illness. Mom and Dad had already left and I was cleaning up after some of the others had left to take supplies back to the clinic. I stop by the well to let Lady Kikipu know that I was heading back to Ul'dah. There was a hyur there, helping one of the local women to get water from the well. Though I was weary of the mask he wore, he seem to be nothing like the mask bandits that I was told about when I was far younger.

 

He notice Kit, and well, she does love it when others notice her. He seem well, not child-like in wonder but wonder all the same from what I could tell of his eyes. His name is Ruran Vas. We spoke for a little bit, until Kit notice something glowing behind his chest armor. When he pull it out, it look like a soul stone, much like the one that came for Kit's book, or Sister's own soul stone. And from what I could tell when I pull Kit's stone out, I could feel a growth in the vibration of the aether within it. It was the first time since it came from the book when Ryuuga.

 

It also seems that I and Sizha are not the only ones that have fairies as well. It's good to know that there are others of Kit's people still around and has partners to help with healing. I told him that I help heal at the Grindstone then I meantion the fight that young Ado had with Grandfather and how I had not seen him. I know that the family must still be hurting over Sir Locke's death. Sir Ruran must have known the hyur a little from the sad reaction he had to his name. I meantion that Dad even thought that Sir Locke's death wasn't an accident but I fear I may have made him only hurt more over the other's death.

 

I told him that he could find me at the clinic if he ever needed a healer or that I would be around Dusk. If he comes by Grindstone, I should let him know that I also have been helping out Aethertide and when the mansion is at if he can't find me in Thanalan. With what Sam and I are probably going to have to face, I should see if he thinks it might be a good idea to take up the offer of learning how to deal with voidsent that Khy and Lady Vi are offering to teach. I wouldn't mind hearing his thoughts on it, even if he doesn't deal with voidsents himself.