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Journal of a Cowboy Ninja


Reylin

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‘Spose if I’m gonna keep a journal of my thoughts and such, I best introduce myself to you.  Hello, my names Reylin Sephr and my favorite color is clear.  Nah, just messin’ with you, ‘bout the color, not my name.  I’m just about six foot give or take the shoes I’m in.  Whitish gray hair with some black at the ends in places.  Sorta soft violet eyes that I’m told are “pretty”, which hurts the whole manly vibe I try to throw out there maybe.  Could be it helps, I dunno, just repeatin’ what I been told a few times.  I like to think I’m reasonably handsome but ain’t stoppin’ a line of carts or havin’ the lady folk through themselves at me.  Reasonable athletic, which comes with the territory due to the work I do.  

 

That’s the long and short of it, I suppose.  Now, Ser Journal, you are probably wondering, “Why keep a written account of your thoughts and feelings on various aspects that take place in your life.  What are you some kind of sissy? That’s what young girls do.”  To this I reply, because it never hurts to leave behind a legacy and secondly, don’t talk like that.  Ain’t nothin’ wrong with a grown man keepin’ track of his life work and you're bein’ kind of a dick about it.  Best show some respect.

 

Besides, I can also be forgetful now and again and this’ll help me remember.  It’s practical.  So stuff it.  Jackass.

 

So’s, anyroad.  Bit about what I do.  I travel a lot.  Largely workin’ as guard duty and such to caravans and merchant types.  Keep the nasties away, kobolds, goblins, people… ect ect, from takin’ what ain’t rightfully theres.  Do a lot of it outta Limsa, which is my home base but also a fair bit from Ul’Dah, given how gil hungry the people in power are there and lastly, but leastly, Gridania.  Don’t get me wrong, love the place, just ain’t as much steady work comin’ from there as the other two.

 

In this respect, I got hired on recently more full time for a group of folks I’ve known here and there, a Wyta, short for her name which is more letters than I can count and requires movements of the tongue best left to… well, let’s say the imagination.  Also a big feller, Granite Tide, or GT, or just Tide.  Both of them Roe and him as big as any.  Wyta has this crazy idea of huntin’ down and disposin’ or storin’ nasty pieces of magic in the world.  Artifacts and crystal sand the like what can hurt people in the wrong, or even the right, hands.  It’s noble on the front but, we’ll see.

 

Problem is, what makes them any better than someone else to have such things?  So far, I’m extending this out on thoughts and a steady bit of pay.  Could be I can’t be trusted with them neither.  Should somethin’ come along in my area of interest, what would I do?  I dunno.  I like to think I’d be altruistic and, “Do the right thing, because that’s what people do”  Though, between you and me, Ser Journal?  I dunno, not really, not until I’m put in that position.

 

So far it ain’t an issue.  One bit of nasty we have gotten does bad things to women.  Makes them crazy, hurt themselves and others, for whatever reason.  Smarter folk than me are on the pay to figure that out, I was just there to retrieve and secure it.  Why people with such knowledge of how magic and such work would turn to creating such horrible objects is beyond me, but just look around and you’ll see evidence of it everywhere.  The Calamity, of course, being the biggest of all recently.  I just don’t get it… but, if we can put some of them under lock and key, I suppose that’s good work.

 

For now though, guess I’ll go down and check the airship schedules here in Gridania… I hate teleporting if I don’t have to but, that’s what I end up getting stuck with more often than not.

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You know the worst part of a stake out alone is?  Other than the mind numbing boredom, it’s the having to pee and not being able too.  Started about thirty minutes ago and it’s only getting worse.  I just know the second I step away to take care of business, that’s when he’ll show too.  It’s like an unwritten law of nature or somethin’.

 

Maybe if I just pretend I’m going too?  Like take a few steps away and jump back around the corner just after I turn it?  Nah, just having planned it out means it won’t work.  Damn it I really gotta …. Oh, hello there.

 

I’ll be damn, course now I get to do this still having to go but… no time like the present.  The lalafell is the one I want, the other one is just muscle, a lot of it at that.  Why do lala’s and roes go together like whiskey and cigars?  Has to be some kind of survival protective instinct, or inbred size irony.

 

They pass right by my alley on the dusty back street of Ul’Dah.  Ugly part of town, impoverished, but still enough folks about they don’t notice.  We walk a ways until we come to his door.  As the lala starts to unlock it and push the door open I decide it’s time to make an impression.  See, I’ve dealt with this little twit before and he owned me, several times, but even with that, he’s never one to give in easily to requests.  Think of him as the hardest working lazy guy you’ve ever met.  So because of this, intimidation and taking away his highest ranked Triad card was a must.  That meant, big guy had to go.

 

The door swung open, I jumped up and wrapped my arms about his thick neck and threw all my weight behind me at the same time.  Leverage is everything. He fell back, I rolled on my back continuing and thrust my feet into his backside and kicked.  I’m not as big as he is and I don’t have the mass, but I’m stronger than I look.  Between that and momentum, big guy went flying to the other side of the street, several feet of it on his head like a top, which was impressive as hell really, and came crashing to the stonework when the guttering stopped him.

 

Flipping back up to my feet to face a slack jawed lalafell that was just now gathering his wits and turning to scramble in the open door and slam the very solid thing in my face.  I stepped forward and got my gauntleted forearm in the door just as it closed on it, the force of the small guy on the other side constant.  I kicked the door, causing it and him to be flung inward, stepped in and kicked it closed behind me and flipped the large lock from the inside.  “Howdy there, Trento, I need a favor from you.”

 

Trendo, his black hair frazzled and got to his feet.  He was fairly standard for his kind, short, obviously, and had a lip weasel he was very proud of and waxed until it shone.  He wore fairly basic tunic and pants of desert colors and a man purse satchel thing across his chest that rested at his stubby legs.  The only thing off putting, was how deep his voice was.  It was like if a bear could talk, all bass and rumbles.  It always made anything he said sound like it had authority or confidence, even when he clearly had neither.

 

“Yeah well, Sephr, you got a funny way of asking for things,” he grumped as he dusted himself off and glared up at me with his beady little black eyes.  “That guy didn’t come cheap you know, and you probably busted him.”

 

“Probably, but next time you hire someone, make sure their neck ain’t so thick they can’t look behind them to see you’re bein’ tailed.  Hell, I did you a favor, I’ll likely just have to add it to the list of them.”  I stepped inside the small but cluttered room. Shelves lined the walls with foot stools before each of them.  Manifests, scrolls, maps, and more.  Information of use to someone sooner or later.  Trendo was one of a few people I knew I could count on to get it for me when I needed it, even if I nearly had to wring it out of his scrawny little neck.

 

He scoffed, trying to recover the high ground, figuratively of course, and sat down at his desk.  “If I got to find a new one, I’m taking it out of your time and charging you.  I got a lot of things to do, I can’t even promise I’ll be able to do what you want with in the next, week or more.  If that!”  

 

“Uh huh.  You’ll get it to me with in the next two days or there’ll be hell to pay, you owe me, not the other way around, if you’ll remember.”  He opened his mouth but I kept talking, “I got a manifest, found at in a qiqirn camp and since the little buggers ain’t one for keeping track of their usual salvaged garbage, I figure someone is trading with them, and I need to know who.”  I pulled out a the list I’d found during an outing looking for an item and instead, found a brand new qiqirn camp sprung up in its place.  

 

Taking the papers with an angry swipe he looked them over as I quietly stood crossing my arms, “I don’t know, Sephr.  Lotta people trade with beast tribes on the downlow and a lot of this stuff is pretty standard wares.  Could take weeks, like I said, you’re not the only person that comes to me you know.  I got dozens of other things I’m looking into right now, all of them ahead of you and more important.  Yeah… come back in a few weeks, I’ll have it for you.”

 

“No, two days… now weeks, not a week, not three days, not two and one fourth of a day.  Two.  Bloody. Days.”  He scowled up at me and I grinned slightly down at him, “Tell you what, I’ll sweeten the pot.  You do this in two days, and I know of a cat girl, ready and willing to do unspeakable things, right here in this office for you for as long as you want.  She’ll be all yours, I know how much you like the ones with the fluffy tails.”  There was an audible gulp and his chubby little hands started to wring together.  Little pervert.  “But only, if I get what I need when I come back in exactly two days.”

 

“Unspeakable… you say?”

 

“Unspeakable.”

 

“Fine… FINE!  Two days and you better have her in the wings after I find it.  It won’t be easy you know!  My time is worth something too!”  

 

“Yes, yes, you’re a busy little delinquent.  Two days, see you then,” I spoke over my shoulder as I unlatched the door and pulled it over.  A wall of angry muscled chest hair right at eye level.  “No hard feelings big guy.”  I patted him on the chest and found myself lifted into the air, feet a few inches from the ground and my coat bunched up in a massive fist. “Gurk!”

 

From behind me the low bass of, “Put him down and get in here before I fire your ass, I got work for you!”

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Two days came and went, as they tend to do regardless of how much you got to do.  So, I found myself once more in Ul’Dah, on the doorstep of the information broker lalafell, Trendo.  Knock, knock…… knock, knock again.  Waiting, waiting…. Nothing.

 

You little piece of…. If he wasn’t so good at what he did.  I put my ear to the door and couldn’t hear anything inside and I didn’t see any candles or lighting through the grimy window.  He stood me up.  All I could do was wait, so, sitting down on the step and setting my bag down beside me, I did just that.  Really wish I’d thought to bring a book, I should have known the little prick would pull something like this.

 

There I waited, and waited, and waited some more.  Until two hours later, I heard shuffling, but not from outside, no, this was from inside.  Oh, he’d better not have.  Standing I turned and banged on the door with a closed fist hard enough to shake some of the grime off the windows.  A lock inside clicked and the door swung in.

 

He stood, yawning and rubbing sleep out of his eyes, “What’re you banging for, geez. I heard you the first time.”

 

Grinding my teeth I pushed passed him and into the small room, blankets disheveled on a cot not more than ten feet from the door.  “Yeah, that was over TWO HOURS ago, Trendo.  My ass has been outside, waiting for you to get here for TWO HOURS, and you were in here the whole time?”

 

“Yeah well, I fell back asleep.  You don’t get good looks like these without plenty of rest.   Besides, it wasn’t easy getting what you wanted and a bit of waiting does you some good after you banged up my guard.”  There was an impish smirk curling under his waxed mustache as he twirled in.  He actually twirled it, like some story book villain, hand to the gods.

 

I took a long deep breath and let it out, “In that case, your bonus might just have lost interest unless you tell me now and stop wastin’ more of my time.”  That got his attention, far be it from him to lose out on his perverted little fantasies.   

 

Grumbling, he waddled to the table and a leather folder of  papers, “You better not stiff me on that.  We had a deal.”

 

“Yeah, yeah, information first. I always hold up my end, let’s see if you do too.”

 

“Guy you’re looking for goes by the name of Heptus.  Hyur right out of this city.  Deals in all kinds of underground things and considers himself something of an inventor as well.  Word is he’s been trading with them for components from old battlefields the Garleans were fighting on or about.  He gives them supplies and stuff, for anything they find of interest.  It’s all right here.  Even managed to match up the writing on that paper you gave me to some of his own.  He’s your man.”

 

Sliding the folder across the table I looked through it.  The writing was pretty close, exact even when looking at the same letters.   Address, name, description.  Perfect, just what the Rens need to find out the next step to that contraption they found and maybe even it’s creator, if he was indeed and inventor.  Time would tell.

 

“Perfect.  Consider one of your favors repaid.”  Turning I waved behind him with the folder and there was a loud clearing of his deep toned throat.  “Right, bonus.  Hold on she’s just outside actually.  Can’t say how energetic she’ll be since you made us wait for two hours though.  That’s on you, mate.”

 

Tucking the folder away in my long coat’s inner pocket I stepped outside and picked up the lightweight leather bag I’d left on the step.  It wiggled and squeak slightly.   Turning I lifted the flap and removed a dark coated female kitten.  “As promised.”

 

His expression?.... Priceless.  There was stuttering and spluttering as the little black ball of fluffy fury jumped out of my hands near the ground and ran, shining eyes on the perfectly waxed cookie duster on his lip.  “You said, it was a Miqo’te that’d do… OW!”  She jumped and dug her claws into his leg and climbed up to his chest, where his arms instinctively grabbed hold of the kitten giving it free reign to bat at his mustache tip.

 

“I promised you a, ‘a cat girl, ready and willing to do unspeakable things, right here in this office for you for as long as you want.’  She’s a female, I found her out in the desert a few days ago, abandoned in a bag on the side of the road.  She doesn’t speak so anything she does to you, will be, well… unspoken.  Likely that’ll just be a lot of playing with string and eating but, hey, I kept my word.”  

 

“This is not what I had in mind and you damn well know it!” He protested as he held the kitten by the scruff of her neck at arms length eyeing her.  

 

“That mean you don’t want her?  I can put her back where I found her if you don’t.”  The scowl I got could have peeled paint from the walls as he clutched her to his chest.

 

“I’m not a monster, abandoned you say?  Fine… fine!  I’ll keep her.  Poor thing’s been in a bag all day as it is.  Just get lost already.  I don’t wanna see you again any time soon, you understand me?!”  

 

“Loud and clear, Tendo.   Loud and clear.”

 

I shut the door behind me, but not before seeing, just before it closed, him rubbing his cheek against the top of her head.  

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  • 1 month later...

Finally got myself a bit of time to sit and think, somethin’ I don’t get to do as much as I should, but it ain’t exactly by accident.  Thinkin’ always leads backwards and there’s nothing back that way.  Only forward, always forward.

 

Things have been moving along, some faster than others, but moving.  Been, “putting myself out there” as they say.  Actually, you know what, reading that after I wrote it, I don’t think I’ll say that.  Makes it sound like I’m sellin’ myself on a street corner in Ul’Dah or, worse, one of them fellows that sits around a bar givin’ the creepy eye to women that clearly want nothing to do with him.  So, let’s see, I’ve been trying to give a damn about people around me.  That works.

 

Some folks, it’s really easy, others…. Well, they’re others.  Most of the folks from Ren are easy enough to speak with, Yuoriey is as well, maybe even too easy.  Also there’s a few  from a new position I’ve taken as an instructor in the Eorzean Garden.  Many are instructors like myself, the rest are students.  Kids really, eighteen and under come to learn various skills.  We’ll see how well it goes, I’ve my first class this comin’ week.  

 

Lot of Domans and others from Othard in the Garden. I don’t know why it makes my uncomfortable.  Hearing the old tongue from my youth, the mannerisms, the culture.  Too many bad memories with the good, mayhap?

 

Speakin’ of memories, I shared some with Yuoriey.  We all had ugly hit us during the Calamity, myself included and when I told her some, she shut down.  So much so, the next time I saw her, she didn’t remember it.  Whatever happened to her, I think it broke part of her. She’s a bit flighty and silly minded, but not stupid or slow.  I can see why people might think that but, people are shallow creatures and don’t look much below what’s right in front of them.

 

Anyroad, she told me a story about  knotted bracelet and two girls that were separated and found each other years later still wearin’ them. “Forget my knots”, she called them.  She has two and gave me two as well that she had made herself.  I was actually touched by the gesture.  I hadn’t gotten a gift that weren’t a bonus or a tip for my work in near six years now.   Though, inline with the story, I gave he one back to wear.  Like her story she loved to much about the two girls that never forgot each other.

 

Of course it weren’t until later layin’ in bed at about one in the morn that I realized her two bracelets were likely for her parents and my two were for…  I’m glad I gave her the one though, even still.  She’s a sweet woman, smart too, and since meeting her I’ve noticed a change, read above to figure out what that might be.

 

Bah, women, right?  Only creatures what can get in a man’s head and one up a parasite on how deep they can dig in.

 

Fool, horrible, beautifully amazing things.

 

Alright, that’s about it for now, ain’t much else I feel like goin’ over at the moment.  Take care.

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