RIOT IN GRIDANIA! HORSE OIL FEVER!

[GloryRhodes]

by Spahro Llorn

 

The calm serenity of the forest boughs was broken last night by the shrill cries of addicts clamoring for a drop, just one more drop, of Horse Oil (not to be confused with Bronco Grease, Eorzea's number one energy tonic).

 

The markets of Old Gridania erupted into violence when a delivery of Horse Oil (a cheap knockoff of Bronco Grease), began its transport from the docks to the stall of Helena Haberdasher, the only purveyor of the drink in Eorzea.

 

"It was madness," she said the morning after the riot.  "They all went crazy!  My stall was robbed and vandalized.  There had to have been at least a hundred of them, all fighting each other to get to the shipment."

 

Witness reports put the number of rioters as high as two hundred ravening souls.  As soon as the shipment came into view several merchants recall hearing a woman's voice shouting, "Get them!"

 

Within moments the crowd, who had been waiting at Haberdasher's stall charged the shipment.  Its meager assortment of guards drew blades in the face of the oncoming horde, and things quickly grew violent.  Unable to push past the guards, the crowd turned on itself, and soon the entire market was a warzone.

 

Eventually some of the crowd broke through the guard and a white haired Miqo'te overturned the cart, dumping the Horse Oil (not Bronco Grease) into the river.

 

With the Horse Oil gone, the crowd dispersed across Gridania in a spree of violence and looting that lasted into the next morning before the Wailers could put it down.

 

The catalyst of the riot is unknown, but witnesses recall a masked, pink haired Auri woman in the midst of the crowd.  Others claim it was a red headed Miqo'te.  Wailers are on the look out for any redhead with with a tail who might be linked to the riot.

 

Horse Oil (The Evil Nemesis of Bronco Grease) is now under investigation by the Fane.  "This kind of behavior is not normal," said Fane representative Silent Conjurer.  "It is possible that Horse Oil contains elements capable of causing mass hysteria."

 

Rumors that Horse Oil causes impotence are, as yet, unconfirmed.

[Anstarra]

Anstarra reads the article at her usual café in Ul'dah, the shade obscuring her bemused smirk.

 

"Oh Spahro, you opportunist... then again since she almost got trampled in the riot, can't really blame her..."

 

Reading on, her lips quirk. A white-haired miqo'te 'overturned the cart'.. just as well Spahro hadn't mentioned An's name, nor her actually lifting the cart overhead and chucking it into the river. That wasn't the sort of thing a dignified woman did...

 

All in all, she was happy with the article. For all its violence, the riot DID showcase the very real addictive qualities of the Oil, if not its void-tainted nature. Good could come from chaos, after all...