First Character Backstory & Looking For Critiques and/or Thoughts

[Fjora]

Hello! So I made a backstory for my first RP character and I was hoping someone might be kind enough to take a look and give some insight or critiques into the backstory. If something is off, lore or other wise, it's too long, too short, not enough or too much of  X, Y, Z here or there. Whatever comes to mind. Thank you in advance for your time and thoughts! My character card is here https://fjoraboesson.carrd.co/. 

[Talha Olobi]

Hey there, Fjora. 

 

I like the backstory! I think it gives your character plenty of emotional depth to work with where the loss of her parents is concerned and I like the added touch that the event took place during the Calamity. She suffered and lost during that event, just like a lot of the characters we see populating Eorzea, and it makes her feel like a part of the setting. The hook concerning her mother's relative is good, too, because it gives you some interesting directions to go in later on down the line. 

 

While I'm still pretty new to FFXIV myself, as far as I can tell, there's nothing lore-breaking about the details you've got here. Don't stress yourself out too much about that, though! By my experience, the RP community is  forgiving enough that they won't jump on your back if a minor detail doesn't exactly match established lore. So long as there's effort to make the character feel like they could logically exist in the setting, that seems to be good enough for many players. 

 

Length is just fine! If you've got the details, feel free to share them, even if it's just for the sake of fleshing the character out in your own head! 

 

Speaking of length, I've rambled for too long.  

 

[Fjora]

Thank you so much for taking the time to read my card and wite your comments!