Kailani

I. Basic Info Characters: Kailani (Ky-lawn-ee), "Kai" Primary character: Kailani Malia Linkshells: A bunch. II. RP Style Amount of RP (light, medium, heavy): Medium to Heavy. My primary reason for playing this game is roleplay, though I also enjoy some PvE content when the opportunity presents itself. I'd prefer for it to lean towards the Heavy once I get some things rolling. Views on RP combat and injuries: I love combat in RP, especially in this type of world where there is conflict on a somewhat regular basis. - I do not like using PvP or dueling for RP combat though. My preference is always emoting out what is happening with a /roll system to help keep it interesting. I do tend to avoid getting into any type of combat with players I don't know unless we can talk some things out beforehand. Godmodding is a huge pet peeve of mine and if I'm enjoying the story but not interested in playing out the combat with a particular person, I'll discuss with them OOC what happened and write it into my story. Views on IC romance: As a player, I'm open to anything organically happening in my characters life, which includes romantic involvement. It's not something I seek out but I'm not opposed to it either. Though I will say, if it ever happened, I as her player would need to have a friendship with whoever the other party was to clarify boundaries as this type of RP can get a little intense at times. So while I won't close the door on it, Kailani is not the type who needs a romantic relationship in her life to be happy. Views on non-romantic RP (family ties, etc): I love depth in my characters lives and this includes a family background or history. Though as we all know, sometimes RPers can be fickle or schedules and interests change, with people coming and going. So my preference is to write in great friends/enemies, instead of blood relatives. Unless we can agree their relationship is estranged with no plans to change that. But relationships whether friends or enemies, business associates and networking are vital to keep a story going. Views on lore: I'm still learning about the FFXIV story, though I very much do like to stay within lore when creating my characters or living out their lives. I also prefer it when the people I interact with do the same. Although, I will not police other people's RP. If something comes up that seems a little off or implausible, I may ask them about it OOC for clarification. But if it's something a player seems to do often, I will probably avoid interacting with them IC. Views on chat functions (/say, /linkshell, etc): I think OOC communication is important when playing a game like this. So keeping open channels in linkshells and tells is something I'd prefer. As for actual RP, I tend to emote out most of my interactions, and include /say type conversation within the emotes. - I am not a fan of /tell RP from people I've never interacted with before unless it is proceeded or preceded with a public emote. III. Other Info Country: USA Timezone: EST - Play times are hit or miss throughout the day, though I am on more often in the evenings. Contact info: In game or via PM here. I use Discord for friends and LS/FC stuff.

Hello RPCers, I'm Kailani, or "Kai" (Ky) as I'm called in game most times. I'm new to FFXIV as of a month or two ago, but not to RP as I've been doing it for about a decade, mostly inspired by MMO's/games. My home is Balmung and my main is a SCH. Roleplay and story writing is a huge passion of mine, but I also enjoy the PvE aspect of the game just as much. I try to balance my time between the two so I don't get burnt out. I've taken the last month getting to know the game while leveling, learning the lore, making a few great friends and pulling together my main's life story. Kailani Malia is a Miqo'te (but don't hold that against her!), though she distances herself from the Seekers culture and the tribes way of life. She feels much more at home among other sorts, mainly Hyur's as most of her friends are of that race. Just a general thank you to the community for being so friendly and helpful, as I've never seen a MMO full of such accommodating and supportive players. I've really enjoyed being part of this group so far and look forward to seeing all that FFXIV has to offer.

Yeah you left out a huge part of the story... :dazed: I've always believed that words aren't actions. If someone feels a certain way, they will SHOW you. Not use the words you may want to hear. And I hate to say it but she may just be keeping you in play simply because she doesn't want to lose the security blanket. You clearly care a lot about her. Worry about you right now and consider moving on. I personally don't think anything you do will change your situation. You can't control it. But you can control yourself. It'll suck, it'll be painful and you'll want to run back every time she says something nice. But respect yourself enough not to be 'that guy'. Best of luck with it all. :thumbsup:

This may sound like a strange question, but I do have reasons behind it. Is your "SO IRL" someone who is an online relationship you've had for a while now, or someone you live with/see daily/weekly? I think this makes a huge difference. In past experiences I've seen online relationships get tossed to the side in lieu of other friendships simply because the person is so used to everything being online or interchangeable even. It could just be miscommunication between you two in regards to priorities. This bit about.. "It's gotten to a point where I can't do anything in game with just her anymore. Like I'm the one tagging along with them.", is really the only thing that makes me question any of it. I've spent endless hours with my RP partner(s) with nothing shady happening behind the scenes that my real life relationships haven't known about. Sometimes there's just a click and you really enjoy that time with them, because there are a lot of crazies in game. But if YOU are feeling like the third wheel, then yeah you need to say something to her ASAP. Because unless you are being super sensitive, demanding of her time or controlling (which you don't seem to be from what you've said), there's never a reason she should be putting her feelings about someone in a game, over yours. Just chat her up about all this, and you'll feel much better. :thumbsup:

One more thing to add in.. I think the people who are looking for very specific types of RP may have a much harder time. In past RP experiences in another game, there were people who were looking for a lot more than just normal, organic RP interactions. Players were already shopping for a romantic or sexual relationship for their character from the time it spawned in game. And I've seen similar things here, as Virella just pointed out, with the tags who shun anyone who doesn't fit in their carnal search for purely ERP. If someone is actually looking for RP, and aren't JUST looking for their match.com...match, it shouldn't matter what sexuality a character is or what gender they are. If a heterosexual female character is ONLY trying to RP with heterosexual male characters because they want romantic RP that badly, you just cut your potential RP list way down, and really only have yourself to blame. Again, not stating anyone in this thread does this, but it's really common. Being open to any RP when you're new in a community is super important. Networking is key.

Just wanted to throw my input in as a brand new player to the game and the community. I have no negative or positive history here, and I think some people who seem jaded around here probably had some negative experiences and are letting that cloud their judgement. I could be wrong though. - Having this silly leaf on my characters, I've actually received a few random messages welcoming me to the game and someone even mailed me 1000gil. (Never saw that in other MMO's I've played) - I do agree with seeing a lot of people with a RP tag never interacting. But I just think of a high school dance with lots of shy people. Everyone who is uncertain of what they're supposed to do.. just sit around and wait. So much wasted time. But yes, I do wish more people with their RP tag up did show some sign of life when sitting in the same spot for hours. - I've approached people IC and OOC and I've never been ignored (so far!). IC I ended up asking for directions in the city a few times, another time I ran up to someone and acted like I knew them and then admitted (all IC) that I had mistaken them for someone else. Just random, surprising things like that seem to catch people, even if it's for 15-20 minutes. OOC.. I've approached a good amount of people based on what information is in their RP note (search info tag thing), and the ones who I really look into are the ones with a tiny URL link to their tumblr/wiki. I've been able to weed through the ones who are obviously in the game for ERP, and have found some pretty awesome characters to add to my contact list. And I made sure to whisper them and show appreciation for the creativity of the character. I figure if I get my name into their head, they may remember me when I come upon them IC sometime. - Absolutely agree with the part about walking up to groups. But I again think about if someone randomly came up to myself and a group of friends at a party or some other social event, and we had no idea who they were, we most likely would just continue with what we were talking about and not welcome the person with open arms. That is just life. - I've yet to worry about the FC thing and I've been too busy to worry about groups of people in the city. There are SO MANY FC on this server that for me it's important to find the right one instead of just finding random people to talk to. I will say that while I was out in the middle of no where, I saw a small group of people RP'ing who shared a FC tag and when I bowed to one of them, they all turned and bowed at me. It surprised me. To add in, again as a brand new person to all of this, my personality isn't really the wall flower type. I played a MMO for the social aspect so what sense does it make for me to sit around and wait. So, I could say that being outgoing and proactive is on my side. It is true.. no one owes anyone else time or RP. It's not a mean statement, it's just a fact. What methods work for me may not work for everyone, but I'd be willing to bet if someone took the time to really try and network, they would surprise themselves. I love the community so far and to me it's far from toxic. Usually I hear that word when someone has had horrible personal experiences in the past and there's still resentment over it. But the community as a whole (in my opinion) has been a great experience. Some people have such unique and fantastic characters, which they've been invested in for years. They are very passionate about what they have created and sometimes that causes them to be very selective about who they interact with. I was the exact same way in my past MMO after RP'ing there for many years with the same group of friends. It would make zero sense if someone changed who their character was, just because someone walked up to them with a cheerful disposition and expected to be entertained with RP. So for any new people, don't be discouraged if you don't get the results you want within your first 72 hours of being in game. You signed up to the play the game in a RP community. So... go RP. *Ignore typos please, absence of coffee

I looked a few days ago when I joined RPC and couldn't find anything about one >.> Joined the new one though! :thumbsup:

Worst advice given so far. Running from your issues as a shy wallflower aren't going to be magical fixed. In fact, I imagine you only have to try HARDER to get noticed on a server with barely any roleplayers. Couldn't agree more with this. Running away, or however you want to label it, is a horrible idea. :frustrated: If anything, the online and RP world helps people with their social skills, dealing with things like rejection, social etiquette, how to treat people, how to deal with the less savory types, faking confidence until you have it and how to become a part of the world without giving up your individuality. If you continue to bounce around just waiting for someone to notice you based on silly things like your characters hair color or the same outfit every other person is wearing, you'll never get anything done. The idea that there are "too many people to be noticed" is just illogical. Just so another person says it.. - Stay put on the server and bask in the extreme diversity this world offers. - Create a unique character using a character sheet if need be, and stick to it. Don't flip flop because of trends or what you think may be popular. - Bite the bullet and approach people in game. Most times it takes just getting to know one person for things to take off. - Write up a detailed, yet concise post in the Making Connections forums. If you're looking for something, let others know. No one can read minds. - Create an interesting Wiki of your character. Give people something to work with, including RP hooks. - Find just a few LS who seem to be of interest and join them. And then chat in them. - Go to events and emote, even if it's to yourself. - Find a FC, be confident and proactive within it, adding to their story. Don't be just another warm body, what's the point? - Be friendly if someone talks to you about some OOC thing (quests, dungeons, questions). They may remember your name if they see you in town and be prompted to interact with you ICly as well. - Be proactive in your game life. Don't be a whiner. No one wants to be around someone who complains about how hard life is when we're all in the same boat. If you've done even half of the things listed above, I guarantee you'd be RP'ing a lot more than you are. :thumbsup: