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Getting Married


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The people of the RPC have truly made this into an epic thread. This, however, is how we feel about the OP for letting us down in the most disappointing way humanly possible:

 

poster2198.jpg

 

Edit: I just noticed after posting this that the person who made the above meme actually managed to misspell awesome. Somehow, that makes it all seem that much more appropriate.

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So I spontaneously go married, its a long story.

Actually it is quite short.

 

So I have a friend who apparently got married, I got a little jealous and saw a random guy and got married to him.

 

Now I know what you are thinking, "How can you marry someone, you just met."

 

Well I can say, spontaneously getting married to someone without and consequences is quite exciting and a thrilling experience.

 

I want treat my new husband with all the respect he deserves, and better myself, learn ways to become a stronger woman for him.

 

We haven't had a lot of time to get to know each other, but we will make up for time we haven't spent together.

 

The problem I have is what do we do now?

 

I want to please him, but don't know how I would go about it. We are both a little shy about our arrangement.

 

So let me know what I should do.

 

The following is a fictitious fabrication designed for entertainment purposes only. Any attempt to associate this account with anything that has anything to do with life would simply be badong.

 

Alright, kids, it's time for some closure. If this thread is truly going to die then we're at least going to have pretend answers to our questions. I must do this for my own sanity and because the OP is full of fail and lose.

 

The OP obviously had a drunken weekend in Las Vegas. Her friend hooked up with some random drunk dude and they decided to get hitched. Think of The Hangover, only without the memory loss. Anywho, the OP was all jealous because she was just as wasted but no random dude wanted to marry her. She then made the wise decision to repeat the process, finding another random wasted dude to marry. All he knew was that he was in Vegas and he was gonna get some, so why not?

 

Fully aware that she'd done something blatantly idiotic (evidenced by the fact that she felt the need to defend herself in her own post), and yet somehow still making herself believe that there were no consequences for her idiocy, the OP still recognized that she needed to reach out to people who weren't wasted in Vegas for help.

 

Why she went from "hey, let's get wasted and married so we can do crazy stuff and I don't have to go to Confession on Sunday" (yes, I made her Catholic for no good reason and no, I'm not Catholic) to "I wanna be a good wife and grow as a person as I please my man" is anyone's guess. What we do know is that she married a dude who just wanted to get lucky. When she suddenly gets a desire to be all domesticated, he freaks the heck out. He's "shy about their arrangement" because as far as he's concerned, the arrangement is NSA sex.

 

They end up staying together for a short while until the dude finally realizes that his NSA sex party has turned into an actual relationship. She actually falls in love with him because she forces herself to believe that they have something real. Understanding that his freedom is in jeopardy, the random guy decides to get an annulment and pick up a less wasted chick from a local bar. Same benefits with fewer headaches.

 

The OP, now rejected and alone, completely forgets the fact that she has reached out to anyone for help. She walks a path that spirals down into the dark world of meth addiction, eventually selling everything she owns to feed her habit. Eventually, she overdoses near an Amish community, where she's found and taken in to be nursed back to health. The Amish help her to overcome her meth addiction but proceed to poison her mind about how technology is evil and will eat her soul. Desperate for approval, she holds to these teachings and lives out the rest of her days with no phone, no lights, no motorcar; not a single luxury (thanks, Weird Al).

 

This is why the OP never again responds to this thread. She spends every waking moment trying to satisfy a man who doesn't appreciate her, sells her computer to feed a meth addiction, and then sells her soul to the Amish. Perhaps we should be ashamed for turning this thread into such a comical party, but somehow I just can't bring myself to feel even the tiniest smidgen of guilt. Here's hoping life doesn't end up sucking for you, OP. You failed us by refusing to explain this insane post and yet still provided us with hours of fun. Wherever you are, whoever you are, we all wish you the best.

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I'm still much happier thinking it was a sardonic poke at 'quick to love' rp relationships that jump the gun. I have no idea how much it happens in ffxiv, but I've seen enough of them through other rp communities to appreciate a humorous parody of it. And, I mean, it was first posted in rp discussion. /optimist

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So I spontaneously go married, its a long story.

Actually it is quite short.

 

So I have a friend who apparently got married, I got a little jealous and saw a random guy and got married to him.

 

Now I know what you are thinking, "How can you marry someone, you just met."

 

Well I can say, spontaneously getting married to someone without and consequences is quite exciting and a thrilling experience.

 

I want treat my new husband with all the respect he deserves, and better myself, learn ways to become a stronger woman for him.

 

We haven't had a lot of time to get to know each other, but we will make up for time we haven't spent together.

 

The problem I have is what do we do now?

 

I want to please him, but don't know how I would go about it. We are both a little shy about our arrangement.

 

So let me know what I should do.

 

 

Another thought...

 

What if OP is Elsa?

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Another thought...

 

What if OP is Elsa?

 

Psst, Anna is the sister that's out to marry a guy after one day.

 

Frozen-image-frozen-36220470-245-150.gif

 

/endnerdcorrection

I was wondering about why I couldn't understand... Then I realized he meant Anna and not Elsa.

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I'm gonna put these lyrics for ya.

 

Anna: Okay, can I just, say something crazy?

 

Hans: I love crazy!

 

Anna: All my life has been a series of doors in my face

Then suddenly I bump into you

 

Hans: I was thinking the same thing! ‘Cause like,

I've been searching my whole life to find my own place

And maybe it's the party talking or the chocolate fondue

 

Anna: But with you...

Hans: But with you

 

Hans: I found my place...

Anna: I see your face...

 

Both: And it's nothing like I've ever known before!

Love is an open door!

Love is an open door!

Love is an open door!

 

Anna: With you!

Hans: With you!

Anna: With you!

Hans: With you!

 

Both: Love is an open door...

 

Hans: I mean it's crazy...

Anna: What?

 

Hans: We finish each other's—

Anna: Sandwiches!

 

Hans: That's what I was gonna say!

 

Anna: I've never met someone--

 

Both: Who thinks so much like me!

Jinx! Jinx again!

Our mental synchronization

Can have but one explanation

 

Hans: You--

Anna: And I--

Hans: Were--

Anna: Just--

 

Both: Meant to be!

 

Anna: Say goodbye...

Hans: Say goodbye...

 

Both: To the pain of the past

We don't have to feel it anymore!

 

Love is an open door!

Love is an open door!

Life can be so much more!

 

Anna: With you!

Hans: With you!!

Anna: With you!!!

Hans: With you!!!!

 

Both: Love is an open door...

 

Hans: Can I say something crazy?

Will you marry me?

 

Anna: Can I say something even crazier? Yes!

 

 

One. Duet. One. Song. ONE DAY and this happens. xD

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