MrPoopyButtHole

--MMORPG background I started out playing Everquest and worked my way through various other MMOs (most notable WoW and FFXI) till I discovered FFXIV. I stuck through the original till most of my mates left and I unsubscribed. ARR came out and we were all impressed so we gave it a shot. I use to play Pyralis Cevas since 1.0 and his story finally came to a tragic end (big shout out to all those who RPed with me throughout the years). After taking a much needed break from FFXIV and RP I've decided to return with a brand spanking new character! --RP experience I've been RPing since I was but a wee child with my childhood friends. Eventually its developed into writing short stories, novels, forum RP, MMO RP, table top, etc etc. --Character ideas/info My new characters name is Jorund Ironheart. I'm modeling his personality somewhat on Geralt of Rivia (Witcher series). He isn't too great with people and avoids crowds since he spends most of his time traveling Eorzea and hunting tempered folks/creatures for the Grand Companies. I'm trying to make him as neutral as possible so as long as the coin is right he'll do the job (minus selling his body of course or something really morally wrong). My old characters that I still play somewhat are Naoh'a Mujuuk (Insane, lovable, kind, wacky Keeper who loves to act and lie) and Arismont Juliembert (Preacher who thinks everyone is a sinner and needs to repent. Devout worshiper to the Twelve pretty much cult like) --How did you learn about the coalition? Been a long time lurker yo. --What kind of a role-player are you aiming to be? Light, medium, or heavy? I can honestly say I enjoy all of the above. Sometimes I'm in the mood for light RP or sometimes I want to be involved heavily in a plot of any kind. --Anything from real life you're comfortable with sharing? (Work, school, hobbies, etc) I'm a lawyer so sometimes I get extremely busy and tend to disappear for a bit. Skype RP is always an option and I enjoy the slower based forum RP as well.

If you do decide to go through with this I know a certain crazy cat that would let his 'Blooker' do anything to him. Poor Naoh'a...RIP.

There was a nothingness inside of him. Growing in place where his heart and soul should be. Drifting through this barren place is what he deserved...his punishment. Just as things were getting better a small seed of doubt was planted in his mind. Or had it always been there? Waiting for the proper nutrition to grow and entangle itself throughout his core till it choked him of his beliefs and ideals. It was his fault that the seed was there to begin with. How and why was it so hard to believe the woman he loved? The woman he shared his story and life with. The woman adored and cherished above all others. We're the vines of doubt so long and eve reaching that it began to choke away his love for her? The logical side of him which he so proudly talked about was no where to be seen. Struck down and brought to his knees by the word of a man he hated. The words of a man who was a Garlean. The hatred begin to build in his stomach and chest...the thought of Evaleigh sleeping with this man...having romantic feelings for him. It made him sick with hatred for not only Halt but.....her. Never had he felt such a way for her. Even with Kale, he could not bring himself to hate the woman he loved. It still felt like floating when his eyes opened widely staring at the ceiling above. A place they called their bed. But the taste of hatred and envy filled his senses knowing that she had brought him here. The Garlean was in his house perhaps his bed. Visions of Evaleigh laying on her back as he took her over and over again....her moaning and rubbing her hands over his markings. He felt so sluggish and tired but he pushed himself up from his deep slumber. Kitchen...that's where she kept the knives. As he rose from the battle he staggered towards the kitchen, tripping and falling over his own feet. The stairs were so difficult. Before he knew it he was standing over his sleeping partner, his wife, his love.... Former love. She used his heart as if it were nothing but one of her former customers. There she slept so innocently without a care in the world. She broke his heart...she ruined him in so many ways. He hadn't lost track of the words -she- did! Pyralis Cevas raised his knife in the air aiming for the heart of his sleeping beauty. But he just couldn't do it....he couldn't bring himself to harm her no matter how much it hurt. "You can do it, my child. Let me help you." Celeste placed her hand on top of his that was holding the knife, "This is a mercy killing for her....she'll always hurt you and you'll always doubt her loyalty. She is still that whore Rhianna trained." Pyralis felt his heart sink at the words...pulling on the strings he hated to think about. The knife came down slowly no matter how he tried to resist it. She was defenseless...helpless....this wasn't him. This wasn't right. They had incredible happy moments together. He knew they loves each other. This was the woman he loved with his very being. Another hand clenched his right hand which was badly damaged, "Your mother is right son....you can do better. You can end her tyranny. With her gone...Rhianna fades away as well." Desmarius spoke to him....his uncle...the master. The sheets came off to expose her naked frame...breasts immaculate as he remembered. The knife came down quickly.....he couldn't stop it. Twelve forgive him. It pierced the flesh, she didn't make a noise, and black blood poured from her chest with his humanity joining her.

How to RP Astrologian And/Or Tarot Card for dummies. [video=youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pWyHiV3l3MA

Random: Someone wants you/loved one dead! *Pyralis puts down paper and nods* Ran out of f**ks to give. Try again tomorrow.

Can also confirm that the SPANISH language exists in-game. An Elezen is teaching/flirting with a girl in the Gold Saucer and translating a Spanish word for her.

One heart beat. The sound of wings flapping drowned out everything else. Two. The roar of the dragons overhead heading to Ishgard. Three. The stinging sensation in his right hand....scarred and useless. Four... Pyralis opened his violet eyes and stared into the small fire he had built for the many cold Coerthas nights. Dragons....so many and Ishgard was under siege. He had heard such rumors but to actually witness it from a far with his own eyes. He prayed that Halone herself would defend the innocent and smite the wicked. The small tent he had built for himself was covered in the daily snowfall of Coerthas weather but at least it kept all his supplies from being ruined. It was so quiet out here now...a couple suns ago he had heard a commotion at the bird men camp as well as the roar of dragons. Bird men and dragons fighting brought a small smile to his lips. Cracked and frozen as they were it was still good to think of the Ixal being devoured by the massive beast. Five heart beats now and you still can't channel your aether anymore. The former bard's violet gaze drifted to his gloved right hand which he still hadn't regained function in. This trip was supposed to bring answers but all it did was confirm that war was coming. A war between a nation of arrogant Elezen who would watch her sister nations burn and dragonkin who probably followed some primal like the rest of the beast. The next sun he'd travel deeper into the Highlands and hopefully get more answers as to the incoming second calamity. Instinctively he reached with his left hand into his vestments to lightly trace his only means of defense...a pistol. Why did he feel like such a coward whenever he touched the damn thing? Six heart beats...have you forgotten your own words? To protect all life wisely. Never give up your own life for frivolous reasons. Living is harder than dying. Pyralis let out a heavy pained sigh and nodded, the truth hurt. Seven heart beats....Kiht? The Keeper's voice came out over the pearl and suddenly he felt his heart drop into his stomach. Why the bloody hells was she out here when she herself warned him about coming? Why was she---she's stubborn and she is a Jakkya. That summoned it all up as to why she was out here in the frozen tundra. Before Pyralis even had a chance to respond he heard the pearl cut off. Panic, worry, run around screaming....none of these things would help. Before he was a bard he was a slaver. He could track, he could hunt, he could find whoever it was he needed given a few bells. Kiht was in trouble and it was his obligation to protect all life at all cost. Without giving it so much as a second thought he packed his first aid kit, food, water, wine, potions, and spare bullets. Within half a bell he was already in hunter mode searching for the woman he....searching for Kiht. Ears to the floor and eyes to the sky...she couldn't be too hard to find...right?

Pyralis has crushes on the following: People that have all their limbs and are alive And Kage.

Love you too bebe :love:

His next book will be "The Lonely Man's Guide to Love: Country Miqo'te Meets the City" (Romantic Novella dedicated to Kage)

Wow! Thank you all for the feedback and tips! I will definitely being going thisite route! So feel free to use any said titles in your rps! Happy rping!

Ello folks! After playing Dragon Age all over again (including DAI) I want to have my character (who is a bard) release books to the Hydaelyn public. I got the idea from Varric who is always releasing various tales and novellas to the public (High on Hardtown for example). So I wouldn't use my characters real name and instead a pen name. Ser Ralip Grayen is a small time author releasing everything from historical text of The Shroud to dirty smut. Some of his famous titles are as follows: 50 Shades of Roe (Erotic novella) The Voidsent Within (Science Fiction) The Long Kiss Goodbye (Romantic Novella) The Black Shroud: Secrets of the Trees (Historical text) How to Lose Gil and Alienate People (Comedy Novella) Letters to my Father (Drama Novella) The Art of Slavery (Historical Text) I love you, please die (Romantic Comedy Novella) When the Twelve Slumber (Erotic Novella) Okay but seriously what do you people think? Plausible to have an author releasing various titles to the public?

It was an awful thing to get accustomed to a smell, truly. When he backed away and turned his back on her he sucked in some air and chewed on his lower lip now that she could only see the back of his head. Zhavi was hard as the shell of a tortoise and while he knew he rattled her, she was still always on top of her game. It was an appreciation for another artist albeit a different form. He could seduce the pants off any woman but Zhavi was immune to ‘charms’ and advances. A part of him was glad and a part of him did in fact want to add a notch to his belt. “Ah I’ll get to it dear; just wanted to remember your aroma one last time before I give this list a read to you. Any chance I can prolong our stays together makes my heart skip a beat.” Pyralis reached down for the list and plopped back down on her cot crossing his legs in as he cleared his throat and began to read. “Lady Genifer Hawke. Female Midlander with black hair, large nose, large bust, and large teeth. Rumored to have a tendency to hang around the wench drinking her sorrows away as she misses her late husband. A supplier of food and poisons.” Pyralis pulled his gaze up smiling at Zhavi, “Not the best of combinations. He continued after clearing his throat, “Ser Illiad Lorental. Elezen Duskwight with a muscular athletic body, green hair, scars on both of his cheeks. Rumored to have a house somewhere near a farm in La Noscea. Deals with weaponry.” Pyralis pulled his gaze up again to Zhavi, “ I can picture you banging a Duskwight…you seem the type.” He read off the last name sounding bored, “Ser and/or Lady Mototo. Dunesfolk with such beautiful features it is hard to determine their gender. Rumored to have fascination with chocobo breeding and, drumroll, the dark arts. Deals in magical runes and weaponry.” Pyralis set the note aside and sucked on his teeth smiling at Zhavi, “Find them and give me their locations as soon as possible. I’ll pay you extra if you bind them and deliver them to me. All of these vendors were given to my employer by a female Hyur contact. I’m still collecting information on her and she’ll figure all my time.” He scratched at his cheek and looked to Zhavi with a devious smile, “Are you sure that is all I can do for you, dear?”

Kudos to everyone involved in Pyralis's year long story arc that is finally coming to an end Saturday. Meyla (Jupi), Evaleigh, Xao, Nheu'a, Atticus, Lena, Wuot, Rinh'li, R'shesha, everyone in the Reclaimers, Everyone in Clan, Everyone in Pillow Fort, everyone that I've missed because the list is so long. It has been a blast and I'll miss running stories with you all! Kudos to everyone in Ul'dah who has tolerated Naoh'a Mujuuk's insanity. He really is a nice guy just completely bonkers and wacky. Kudos to Zhavi for reigniting my passion for forum RP. I'm thoroughly enjoying our little story. Lastly, Kudos to you for reading this. We should mate.

The hand tangled in his ear made his eyes go wide only slightly before realizing that this woman did not back down. Her reputation proceeds her. The choices of how to respond and how to act start playing through his mind. Even if he could take it further, he didn't know if his stomach and nose could handle much more. The thumb that grazed her lip moved towards her chin as each digit locked around it to give it a firm squeeze, "You'll get your coin. But as much as I'd love to continue this, believe me I would, I have a letter to read to you, aye?" He'd release his grip from her chin and try to step back some if she allowed him to.