Performance Anxiety?

[Magellan]

 

 

-I also liked Erik Mynhier's idea of RPing just to practice and not counting as anything that actually happens IC. Wonder if there's a linkshell for this... if not, I bet it'd be well received.

In Tera, I used to run rp classes for beginners. About a year ago, Claire ran a weekly event called Drama Club that was similar in design, only IC. Id be happy to run practice sessions with you anytime!

[Aysun]

I suffer from something like this - really bad! - though mine manifests differently.

It took me awhile to realize it and to figure out how to explain it. It still doesn't make sense to my RP partner when I do explain it!

 

My problem, personally, is set up. If someone wants to RP with me, or I want to RP with someone, I can't set it up OOC. I can't just casually come up with a reason to be somewhere and say 'hey want to RP? we could meet here' to someone in /t or work out a scene before hand. I shut down. I can't RP. I can't come up with anything to type. No reasons to be there, no motivations. The only way I can easily, naturally RP, is to just go IC somewhere in game and engage ICly - which is rather hard to do. These days no one seems to just go hotspots (other than the Quicksand) and just.. do things IC or loiter a bit. This is one of the reasons I adore LS RP, because it allows me to just jump right in IC no matter where I am and then have IC events/in-person stuff flow from there.

 

I haven't found a way to get over my issue in 5~ years of XIV RP. People think I'm insular/cliquey and uninterested because I don't PM them or initiate RP OOCly. I've accepted that this is just how it is for me, and accept the judgement from others with no hard feelings if we do ever RP.

 

I call it stage fright, because it feels the same as walking out on stage and just completely forgetting everything you're supposed to do. Deer in the headlights go! Our manifestation of RP anxiety are different though - and I think that's a good thing. Yours is not something I think you have to 'accept' so much as just work through, or modify your RP habits.

 

Is it in public situations where you clam up? Is it in 1-on-1 only? Do you need to simply ask OOC if the other person minds your shorter posts til you can get in the groove (so that you don't stress about them)?

 

Length of posts, prose, etc, was a big deal where I learned to RP. If you posted without a "cut" (that is, had to cut off your post and continue on another line), you weren't worth RPing with. I have yet to meet a person here who expects post length to be met equally. So long as you are making an effort and the scene is enjoyable to all involved, that's all anyone cares about. It's a great thing about this community. Everyone here really understands most forms of anxiety, as we all seem to suffer with varying degrees of it, too!

[Zhavi]

I suffer from something like this - really bad! - though mine manifests differently.

It took me awhile to realize it and to figure out how to explain it. It still doesn't make sense to my RP partner when I do explain it!

 

My problem, personally, is set up. If someone wants to RP with me, or I want to RP with someone, I can't set it up OOC. I can't just casually come up with a reason to be somewhere and say 'hey want to RP? we could meet here' to someone in /t or work out a scene before hand. I shut down. I can't RP. I can't come up with anything to type. No reasons to be there, no motivations. The only way I can easily, naturally RP, is to just go IC somewhere in game and engage ICly - which is rather hard to do. These days no one seems to just go hotspots (other than the Quicksand) and just.. do things IC or loiter a bit. This is one of the reasons I adore LS RP, because it allows me to just jump right in IC no matter where I am and then have IC events/in-person stuff flow from there.

 

I haven't found a way to get over my issue in 5~ years of XIV RP. People think I'm insular/cliquey and uninterested because I don't PM them or initiate RP OOCly. I've accepted that this is just how it is for me, and accept the judgement from others with no hard feelings if we do ever RP.

 

I call it stage fright, because it feels the same as walking out on stage and just completely forgetting everything you're supposed to do. Deer in the headlights go! Our manifestation of RP anxiety are different though - and I think that's a good thing. Yours is not something I think you have to 'accept' so much as just work through, or modify your RP habits.

 

Is it in public situations where you clam up? Is it in 1-on-1 only? Do you need to simply ask OOC if the other person minds your shorter posts til you can get in the groove (so that you don't stress about them)?

 

Length of posts, prose, etc, was a big deal where I learned to RP. If you posted without a "cut" (that is, had to cut off your post and continue on another line), you weren't worth RPing with. I have yet to meet a person here who expects post length to be met equally. So long as you are making an effort and the scene is enjoyable to all involved, that's all anyone cares about. It's a great thing about this community. Everyone here really understands most forms of anxiety, as we all seem to suffer with varying degrees of it, too!

 

Maybe a separate idea for a separate thread, but it might be cool to try out timed 'rp hotspots' where someone just says 'hey, my character will be here at this day/this time if anyone wants to stop by to rp'.

 

Dunno if that might help that kind of problem, but it would hopefully be less pressure for those who don't like coordinating oocly?

[Kyrio Lamansque]

I'm not going to try to sound snotty or something but.. 

 

I'm shy IRL. Playing something other than an awkward, withdrawn guy is a little difficult for me. And while for some people, that works. Especially for those playing 'white knight' sort of characters that may like coming in for the rescue. But being pressed to the corner of the Quicksand, and running scared when someone got drunk and belligerent weren't exactly endearing qualities. 

 

I knew that, when I came back and wanted to keep Kyrio's character intact yet try to appeal to a great audience, I had to change his character. Make him friendlier. More outgoing. Some people have had the joy of having Kyrio, instead of just sitting back and observing, to JUMP into conversations. Rudely butt in as soon as he found something he could relate to and just include himself into conversations. Otherwise, I was likely signing Kyrio away to a life of mediocrity. He had to make the decision that in order to be happy, he had to wear his heart on his sleeve a little and be a little daring to get someone to look at him (senpai~).  

 

When it comes to growth, you have to step out of your bubble a little bit.

[Vysce the Lad]

It really does get easier! Rp is all about connection and you show off a small side of yourself for the other person to see. Honestly, I think rp is what I'm best at... period, which is why it can be a little hard for me when I walk my character into a room and everyone is having really cool rps with people. Especially when they're rp celebrities like Faye or Erik... I just clam up and log out.

 

I even made an alt just because I once heard this lalafel player say IC that there were no other younger lalafels to play with, so I rolled a younger character in an effort to be friends and have fun rp times... but the same thing happened, and now I'm deleting the character...

 

Erm... what I mean to say is, don't give up! I do understand that feeling of being intimidated by amazing writing, especially with the usage of really interesting vocabulary. I just can't remember some words. T-T It's a confidence check! >.<

 

Sometimes I find it easier when I see a character sitting alone, and I can right click them and their search info says they like walk-up rp. I see this most in the Quicksand, so I can stroll up and have my character chat with them. Maybe you could try that? THis community is mostly really nice to new rpers too, so there's nothing wrong with asking questions~

[Darien Cadell]

but sometimes I visualize a certain gesture or a subtle but meaningful shift in body language, and I want my response to adequately describe exactly what I'm seeing in my head.

 

I found these while looking at Berrod's... er, well, Berrod. But if description is a problem, maybe these will help?

 

Tip of My Tongue - Find that word that you've been thinking about all day but just can't seem to remember

OneLook Reverse Dictionary

 

Not fussing, though, is of course the best approach. Long or short, it's all in the name of fun.

[Gegenji]

Especially when they're rp celebrities like Faye or Erik... I just clam up and log out.

 

That's a point I think that needs to be made. This is just everyone playing pretend and having a good time. There are no real "celebrities." Sure, there's people that others may recognize more than others but they're no different from anyone else.

 

Heck, I RP with the likes of Warren and Jancis (and Roen on occasion!), and I can tell you straight up that they're just like the rest of us. Don't see them as unapproachable celebrities - view them as another person you could have fun RPing with. If you ask them nicely like you would anyone else, I'm sure they'd love to have your characters meet.

[Kellach Woods]

For me it's less performance anxiety (Kell being Kell will cause awkwardness regardless of whether I screw up or not) moreso than not having an "in" most times. A lot of the usual suspects know each other and have been through thick and thin. I've no problems RPing with people I've been with, but when it comes to complete strangers, I've got barely anything in common with them so I have to bank on them approaching me or get no RP.

 

I mean, I didn't know Aya or anyone from that night, but once I found an in, I just got there, and fun times were had by all.

 

I just need a hook.

 

I can only say that I've not had a TON of paragraphs, usually just concentrating on simple gestures and speech, yet there is no problems. Keep in mind I often emote if there's an adequate one, and move adequately. I use my in-game avatar as a way to communicate non-verbally because we have that tool.

[Telluride]

Nathan has a game he'll play at the Quicksand - he'll volunteer to go up to anyone and start up a conversation, and let that anyone be chosen for him, on the stipulation that the person doing the choosing has to back up whatever angle or story Nate comes up with.

 

Turning it into an IC dare as well as an OOC dare stirs the blood and makes things happen.

[K'nahli]

After two months as an active roleplayer on Balmung, this is something I've really struggled with, and I'm wondering if anyone here has the same issue.

 

I love the idea of RP. I do. I enjoy reading transcripts and hearing about other people's characters, and am excited about the backstories and personalities I've come up myself. It's safe to say that thinking about RP is one of my favorite FFXIV-related past times.

 

But then I try to actually RP, and that's when it goes to shit.

 

I'm not a great writer, and when I'm in an RP, I become extremely aware of this fact. I see other people come out with these delightful, interesting and well-written paragraphs in less than a minute and when it's my turn to respond, I panic. It can take me a few minutes to give a satisfactory response, and even then it's not impressive writing. Despite the fact that I've given both my characters a lot of thought, they still seem to come out sounding like caricatures. And the more I panic, the more wooden they seem to sound, the slower my responses tend to get, and the more I panic.

 

Like logically I know RP is not supposed to be a competition, but it really feels like an exam that I didn't study for a lot of the time.

 

Does all this sound familiar to anyone? If so, did it get better over time? Have you found anything that helps with this?

 

This is me all over, especially with characters I haven't RP'd very much or if I have difficulty understanding one(*cough* Andre*cough*). Attempting in-game RP is worst of all since I have little time to react and sometimes, if there has been a bit of a pause, I feel obliged to speak again even if my character wouldn't really have anything to add -expecting the other person to continue.

 

What's worse is that I am terrible with coming up with conversation irl. That is, with strangers/people I don't know well anyways. So anything more lenient toward carsual encounters or scenes make it difficult because even if my character is supposed to be amiable and chatty... I can't really force that.

 

Clover Blake is my RP partner and at times I honestly don't know how or why she puts up with me. I can't write nearly as eloquently as her. I tend to make my writing sound forced and clunky by trying to compensate with over-description or technical description(like with movements when I am trying to make sure the read sees exactly what I do)... and that just doesn't work; hers on the other hand always sounds so natural to me. I just don't know how to do it.