Drama and lots of it ~

[ArmachiA]

Have had no issues on Gilgamesh with this yet.

 

Yet being the key word here. Something will implode. You'll either know about it or be a part of it, but something will, inevitably, implode.

[YesGood]

Have had no issues on Gilgamesh with this yet.

 

Yet being the key word here. Something will implode. You'll either know about it or be a part of it, but something will, inevitably, implode.

 

Chances are it's happening it's just not happening for you yet. I know it's not happening for me on Balmung yet so I'm in Eross' boat at the moment.

[Faye]

There's drama everywhere. To put it short, a lot of people are assholes, and that side of people tends to come out even more online than it will in real life, especially in competitive communities like MMO's. The being said, I don't find RPers to be any more dramatic than other people. The only reason RP servers may have a bit more drama than other servers is that along with the OOC drama that exists everywhere, there's also the occasional person who let IC drama bother them far more than they should and turn into OOC problems. That, and the RP community is small--I've already found people here who know each other from other games and are holding grudges against each other still about things that happened in previous games. All in all, though, the drama llamas are everywhere. They can't be avoided. If you like to RP, you're still better off staying here and suffering the one or two extra drama llamas. Online "drama" can be hurtful at first, but when you take a step back it's all really asinine and it's not worth letting it bother you.

[Sefrah]

In my time in MMOs I've had the worst of Drama in my past MMO, TERA. The problem is the word popular and my name appeared all too often. It was annoying, because of the people it brought out. During my time as a guild leader there were people who joined my guild SOLELY to 'Hang out with Sefrah'. It hurt. They fought with each other over who was Sefrah's 'Favorite'. People left the guild over this stuff. A wise friend put it bluntly, "Welcome back to high school, and you're the popular girl."

 

In short, what I've seen, is either 1. People want to be the center of attention, or 2. They want to get approval from someone who gets the attention. I'll be honest: My strange popularity I didn't handle well. I wasn't used to it, and thus, I created tons and tons of unnecessary drama. Friends didn't help either - more than once people placed me on a pedestal because I'd draw attention.

 

My advice to people who seem to be surrounded by drama, or seem to have a bunch of 'stuff' around them -  Separate your friends, and everyone else, out. As a friend told me, "There's your friends, and your fans. Your friends are who you spend time with. Your fans are people you smile, wave, give them their moment, and move on."

 

I have no idea if anything I'm saying is helping, but just, enjoy the game! Say hello to people! Be nice and don't be afraid of meeting people! Faye's jiggling is not that intimidating! You never know what'll happen!

[Rosekitten]

Actually it made sense what you said. Though I wouldn't call myself wanting to be center of attention or popular ^^; (least in my mind I could be wrong?) But I think the ones who left were those types in some way or another... it seemed to be when I disagreed with them or didn't give them the attention a sudden outbreak of drama happened =/ 

 

Little I can do to change that though as I won't bend myself backwards to agree with someone on something I disagree with. xP I would rather come to some midway point in that both sides have their own thoughts but can accept that each other has such and such point in their views.

[YesGood]

Actually it made sense what you said. Though I wouldn't call myself wanting to be center of attention or popular ^^; (least in my mind I could be wrong?) But I think the ones who left were those types in some way or another... it seemed to be when I disagreed with them or didn't give them the attention a sudden outbreak of drama happened =/ 

 

Little I can do to change that though as I won't bend myself backwards to agree with someone on something I disagree with. xP I would rather come to some midway point in that both sides have their own thoughts but can accept that each other has such and such point in their views.

 

Well that sort exists in all realms of reality and at all ages, sadly. The people who want attention, all of the attention and don't want to share any of it are often the same people who instigate issues where there just aren't any. There's really no reasoning with people like that as with that sort of mentality an individual is constantly waiting for any little tidbit of issue to arise that they can use as a catalyst towards their own personal campaign. It's hard to know when someone is that way or when someone is just having a hard day or a hard week.

 

You seem to have done the best you can with the budget allowed. So just keep truckin'.

[Rosekitten]

I don't think I would mind if they were having just a bad day or week. Things can be forgiven. But when it is a repeat action or attitude.. that is when it becomes a real issue. In a way it was good two of them left on their own no matter what snide remarks they are making behind my back (and the other calling me a b**** rather proved my point on why he was kicked after that long talk we had with him). 

 

I did send each of them off saying I wish them the best of luck, they can take that how they wish. Though i did mean it. I wasn't trying to be smart or wish them ill luck with it. D;

[Tobias Nightbringer]

Good to see some things are left unchanged during my RP hiatus  

 

Welp, I'll keep this as short and sweet as possible since I am pretty positive everything that needs to be said has been said by the others already.

 

To the OP, to answer your question, I believe that is just people in general. It may not be as drastic as to where it is like a switch being flipped and they instantly turn around to hate you of course. Unfortunately, I do believe that those people 'in general' have a higher rate of showing up in RP communities much like they do in fandom communities. 

 

 

 

 

Now as for drama caused by RP in general, I'll just toss in my two cents since I got nothing to do but wait for my shift to be over. This pertains to RP/IC/OOC/IRL in some form or another. Take it as you will. 

 

Anyway, there are some people who feel entitled and/or privileged that become spoiled brats who whine about not getting what they want for whatever reason. Fuck those people.

 

Then there are others who are too immature mentally and don't know how to handle disagreements like a grown ass adult (apologies to the actual kids on this site I am sure there are some very mature young'ins running around here ) and end up just becoming a hater. Fuck them too.

 

And THEN you have those that defy the Golden Rule of Roleplay--never let worlds collide. Meaning don't ever let IC shit mix into the OOC and/or vice versa. Fuck these people in particular. I like to think of it like Vegas. Whatever happens there, stays there. I talk about stuff that happens in an RP while OOC, of course, who doesn't? But I'm not going to let it start affecting my REAL LIFE in a negative form because in the end--IT IS FUCKING MAKE BELIEVE. Fortunately MOST RPers abide by this 'Golden Rule' but those that do not...I have seen things. Terrible things.

 

Oh look, almost time for me to go home

[Rosekitten]

On the note of brats and feeling entitled... *rubs forehead* I swear I try to let this whole issue go under the rug to be forgotten and someone has to keep bringing it up. 

 

Here is another question then... 

 

If someone bashed, harassed or went as far as personal attacks on you should you worry about helping them get a out for their character as far as a FC or some other story is concerned? 

 

Pretty much just want to see what people will say to that, personally I said no I refused to RP with someone who wanted to personally attack me ooc. A RP is suppose to be something you enjoy, if I had to force myself to RP with someone who wanted to bash me and burn the bridges before they left I doubt (no I'm pretty sure) I would not have fun doing that RP. 

 

(Granted this issue is resolved more or less as well, I just wanted to see if I could get feedback on it, like personal thoughts on if OOC bashing had a effect on if I should or should not help someone IC'ly. There were a number of other ways the character could have taken a out of the story he was in without the route that was taken...)

[Tobias Nightbringer]

On the note of brats and feeling entitled... *rubs forehead* I swear I try to let this whole issue go under the rug to be forgotten and someone has to keep bringing it up. 

 

Here is another question then... 

 

If someone bashed, harassed or went as far as personal attacks on you should you worry about helping them get a out for their character as far as a FC or some other story is concerned? 

 

Pretty much just want to see what people will say to that, personally I said no I refused to RP with someone who wanted to personally attack me ooc. A RP is suppose to be something you enjoy, if I had to force myself to RP with someone who wanted to bash me and burn the bridges before they left I doubt (no I'm pretty sure) I would not have fun doing that RP. 

 

(Granted this issue is resolved more or less as well, I just wanted to see if I could get feedback on it, like personal thoughts on if OOC bashing had a effect on if I should or should not help someone IC'ly. There were a number of other ways the character could have taken a out of the story he was in without the route that was taken...)

 

Wow. After reading that, I realized that the "Golden Rule" may not work entirely as a blanket statement 100%.

 

I have never, EVER, met anyone, nor really heard of anyone, attack someone personally and verbally, then turn around and ask them for help/favor in real life, in roleplay IC/OOC, or just in general lest they were talking shit behind the other person's back. Wait, let me rephrase that because I am sure that statement is entirely false. I've might have met people who would make nice in front of me and hated on me behind my back but was too much of a bitch to say anything to my face.

 

Like the ONLY way I could see something like this happening is if someone is talking shit behind your back but smiles to your face. You know, back stabbers, bitches, tricks, ho's, other colorful terms of endearment! I don't think ANYONE would do anything for someone else if they knew that the person they were helping was two-faced. That being said, that also pertains to your specific situation instead. 

 

So in short--fuck that person.:evil:

[Rosekitten]

more or less .. some drama came up (of course) we voted and agreed to kick the user after we tried to talk and reason with the user. Well of course that did not go over well. They bashed me as a leader before they left the chat and then proceeded to messed my husband in game saying that I was a bitch. o-O;

 

just the other day he wanted to ic'ly write his character out of the FC's story.. this would force a story me and a few others had finished to re-write it and such. 

 

But as I said the issue is over with I just wanted to see what others thought on it as a whole. I wouldn't have helped him personally but .. I was sort of talked/forced into it...

[SessionZero]

Being one of the people in on this, I still say fuck him (you know who I'm talking about) he can go write himself out of the FC on his own damn time away from where I can see it, because if I have to see anything written by that little puke again, I will just absolutely lose my mind.

[Tobias Nightbringer]

Welp, those then be my thoughts! 

 

The only thing I would have done differently if I were in your position, OP, was not be talked/ESPECIALLY FORCED into it. That is where the almighty 'Null Hammer' comes into play.

 

USUALLY all parties involved need to be in agreement to make things more or less 'canon'. One of the beauties of RP. They can write whatever they want, but if you do not wish to be part of the story, you have every right to deny them the use of your character. 

 

"Shit went down and they were infected by the Weredouche plague and Twilight'ed their way out the fucking door. I don't know, I don't give a fuck."

 

Boom, perfect way to exit ANY FC Everyone wins.

[Strife]

One thing roleplayers are great at, is drama and lots of it.

 

As many have said here, you just gotta say "fawk it!", try not to let it eat at you and find new people to play with. There are to many cool, chill people out there to worry about a few fawktards.

[Rosekitten]

well seeing as it was more or less a compromise.. it meant we didnt have to rp with the user or redo the story. More ro less it added a few foes to the fight and the character fled the fight.. Past that he was not allowed to interact or influence the other characters D;

[Dravus]

It's best not to get so worked up over these things unless the harassment is very extreme. There's always the blacklist function that can be made use of and the possibility to simply log off and do something else until the dust settles. A lot of the drama in the role-playing community - bar a few exceptions - is pretty much along the lines of playground spats. As soon as people realise that it becomes a lot more tolerable.

 

Heck, since joining this community I've been called a 'blunt dick' and all sorts of things in-game simply for posting something someone else happened to disagree with. I just shrug it off and laugh it off because most role-players aren't worth losing sleep over or getting upset at. Judging by their behaviour, I do wonder if some of the nastier specimens can even function in the real world, but that's another matter entirely.

 

On an unrelated note, though, my experience with drama in role-playing communities leads me to believe that there's usually two sides to most drama related stories. Sure, we can give people in this thread the benefit of the doubt and assume that they've been riled up by the player in question, but as far as I'm concerned people are just stooping down to his/her level by giving into their hatred and posting all sorts of nasty comments about him. It's not going to do much to diffuse the situation and is likely to just fuel tensions further.

[Rosekitten]

Not really my intention to rile things further... let alone stood to that level. My original post on both parts was asking questions. I was more or less looking to see what the communities thoughts were. If was were really riled by these events I doubt I would have taken the time to post. Odds are I would have just switched servers and said to hell with RP shit heh. 

I was just looking for feedback really. Also I would like to point out I haven't said anything really nasty about either one of the three who seem to dislike or hate me. I mentioned the word of brat but that is hardly a bad word, let alone I did no name dropping in here as to prevent anyone else of thinking poorly of these players. 

 

As I said, simply wanting to see people's thoughts as things like this interest me.

[Asyria]

I'm a bit late but just noticed the edit in the first post...

If someone attacks me personally?

/blacklist.

End of story.

I'm not going to waste time on someone who decided they hate me.

The only exception is if I thought of them as a good friend, then I'd want at least clarification... and maybe resolution. IF their reasons aren't completely messed up.

In my years of cyber-interactions, I've ignored/blacklisted/what-have-you more people than I befriended.

Part of life I guess, even more so online.

[DAISHI]

We're allowed to curse on this forum? Fuck yes!

[Arkghyom]

I know, so much drama.

Like, I have to text everyone I know right now.

[DAISHI]

I'm totally hitting up my peeps on Twitter yo.

[K'dath]

The only way to avoid drama is to not be dramatic. If that's beyond your grasp, you will find it wherever you go. In a welcome, loving community ... in a wretched hive of trolls... all by yourself under a rock... etc.

 

The you here being a general 'you' not targeting anyone specifically.

[Alothia]

Sadly, drama pops up everywhere. People aren't going to like you, they aren't going to like each other, they're going to want you to step in even though it's not your place...

 

The best thing to do is realize that we should all be adults and should be able to talk about things like this. If people don't want to talk, then it's best to part ways.

 

It's not worth leaving your group of friends, it's not worth stressing over (even though it's really difficult to do), and it's not worth leaving servers. It will come and go. There will be periods of peace, and there will be periods of strife. But in the end, is the story worth it? Are you having fun? The answer should be yes. It's when it gets to be no that you have a problem.

 

*hugs* Believe me, I've seen my fair share of drama since 2.0 started, and even before then. It will pass.

[Fen]

Time for my two gil, I suppose... Drama is horrid. It really is. But I believe it has been said earlier that people are the cause of this, people with sensitive feelings, people with a lacking grasp on the IC/OOC line, people who are... frankly, little gits. It happens everywhere, and it is very immature, and I've had to leave guilds and even kill off a character because of it. It happens. And it's not fun.

 

That said, it is not the norm. More often than not, you encounter the nice, level-headed sort, who may be sucked into the drama, as I've seen with some good friends in past games, but will rarely cause anything (I like to think of myself as part of that number). It's that little five or ten percent that ends up causing these blowouts.

 

To more directly address the latter question... I would have to momentarily abandon my eloquence in favor of a big ol' "Fuck them." Hurrah for Blacklists! But seriously, if everything reasonable's been done and there's still a problem, just get away from them and move past it, they aren't worth the stress or effort.

 

Take this with a grain of salt, of course, I'm not one of these people who have been at it for decades. >_>

[BlessedSilence]

Here's some ideas about how to help with the drama (as people have explained it well enough)

 

1.  COMMUNICATION.  I cannot emphasize this enough.  Right now, my character has seen and is in little parts of drama RP, but we are totally cool OOCly.  Why?  Because we talk OOCly.  I told them my feelings and concerns, and they explained why their character felt such and such a way.  Talking help.s

 

2.  Learn to separate IC/OOC.  Many people have problems with this.  It is something many still are learning.  You might ICly say you don't like highlanders because your character thinks they drink too much and never bathe.  And some player might be a highlander and IRL drinks alot.  So they can take that IC comment, and OOCly hate you for it.  It happens ...

 

3.  Leave.  If something bothers you, leave the area.  Don't stand and take the punishment and venom.  If the follow you?  ignore them.  If they send you tells?  Blacklist them.  The game has those options so do use them.  Don't think just because you RP you MUST take such abuse.

 

And never, EVER feel bad on reporting a person.  I've seen many people do disgusting things to RPers from sitting on them saying they are raping them, to deficating on the table over and over.  Blacklisting a person will keep you from seeing anything they type, you're just stuck watching them to motions.

 

Don't let a few people ruin your RP experience or your server.  I have heard many times people come to a conclusion as your husband has, and I think it is a 'shoot at the hip' reaction.  But hopefully you both find a place you enjoy playing.