Christmas Carol Remixes: FFXIV Version

[Oscare]

I don't think we really need to explain this game. Christmas is coming up, and we should make some Christmas carols/poems/story/song parodies.

 

Basic things, each poster continues the media for the next three lines in a setting fitting FFXIV! Let's start with a fun basic, Twelve Days of Christmas.

 

On the first day of Starlight,

The Twelve gave to me,

Another painful farm party

[Berrod Armstrong]

On the first day of Starlight,

The Twelve gave to me,

Two on my sands roll, 

And Another painful farm party

[Warren Castille]

On the third day of Twilight,

the Twelve gave to meeeee~

Three rounds at the Grindstone

Two on my sands roll

and another painful wipe-farm partyyyy

[Oscare]

On the fourth day of Starlight

The Twelve gave to me

Four black mages

Three rounds at Grindstone

Two on a roll of sands

And another painful farm partyyyy

[Gegenji]

On the fifth day of Starlight,

The Twelve bequeath to me:

Fiiiiiiive Sultanswoooooooorn,

Four Black Mages,

Three Grindstone rounds,

A two-roll on that sand,

And anoooother painful farm partyyy~

[Dogberry]

On the sixth day of Starlight,

The Twelve bequeath to me:

Six Manderville Men

Fiiiiiiive Sultanswoooooooorn,

Four Black Mages,

Three Grindstone rounds,

A two-roll on that sand,

And anoooother painful farm party!

[Telluride]

On the seventh day of Starlight,

The Twelve bequeath to me:

Seven Sylvan Sighs

Six Manderville Men

Fiiiiiiive Sultanswoooooooorn,

Four Black Mages,

Three Grindstone rounds,

A two-roll on that sand,

And anoooother painful farm party!

[Oscare]

On the eighth day of Starlight,

The Twelve bequeath to me:

Eight retainers a stealing

Seven Sylvan Sighs

Six Manderville Men

Fiiiiiiive Sultanswoooooooorn,

Four Black Mages,

Three Grindstone rounds,

A two-roll on that sand,

And anoooother painful farm party!

[DreamedReality]

On the nineth day of Starlight,

The Twelve bequeath to me:

Nine broken overmelds;

Eight retainers a stealing;

Seven Sylvan Sighs;

Six Manderville Men;

Fiiiiiiive Sultanswoooooooorn;

Four Black Mages;

Three Grindstone rounds;

A two-roll on that sand;

And anoooother painful farm party!

 

---

[Dat Oni]

On the tenth day of Starlight,

The Twelve bequeath to me:

Ten slanderous newspapers

Nine broken overmelds;

Eight retainers a stealing;

Seven Sylvan Sighs;

Six Manderville Men;

Fiiiiiiive Sultanswoooooooorn;

Four Black Mages;

Three Grindstone rounds;

A two-roll on that sand;

And anoooother painful farm party!

[Maril]

On the eleventh day of Starlight,

The Twelve bequeath to me:

Eleven hyped lalafells

Ten slanderous newspapers

Nine broken overmelds;

Eight retainers a stealing;

Seven Sylvan Sighs;

Six Manderville Men;

Fiiiiiiive Sultanswoooooooorn;

Four Black Mages;

Three Grindstone rounds;

A two-roll on that sand;

And anoooother painful farm party!

[Steel Wolf]

On the twelfth day of Starlight,

The Twelve bequeath to me:

Twelve Miqo'te dancing

Eleven hyped lalafells

Ten slanderous newspapers

Nine broken overmelds;

Eight retainers a stealing;

Seven Sylvan Sighs;

Six Manderville Men;

Fiiiiiiive Sultanswoooooooorn;

Four Black Mages;

Three Grindstone rounds;

A two-roll on that sand;

And anoooother painful farm party!

[Oscare]

Wow, so uh. That got done pretty quickly.

 

We should title this... The Twelve Days of Starlight. Yeah, that sounds good.

 

Next on the list is Jingle Bells! Due to the length of the song, we're simply gonna do up till the the chorus. I'll start off with three lines, and the poster will continue with two and so one to save time.

 

Sprinting through the snow

In a one-chocobo open sleigh

O'er La Noscea we go

[Telluride]

Wow, so uh. That got done pretty quickly.

 

We should title this... The Twelve Days of Starlight. Yeah, that sounds good.

 

Next on the list is Jingle Bells! Due to the length of the song, we're simply gonna do up till the the chorus. I'll start off with three lines, and the poster will continue with two and so one to save time.

 

Sprinting through the snow

In a one-chocobo open sleigh

O'er La Noscea we go

 

... dozing all the way

The duty just won't pop

'Cause I'm a DPS

And now I'm seeking Season's cheer

So I won't be so depressed!

 

Yes, I cheated.

 

Revised version to continue:

 

...'cause the unicorn ran away

Tired of chocobo smells...