Roen

I am a sucker for romance. It increases my investment in any story if there is a possibility of a romantic attachment between characters. I will confess that I am a compulsive shipper when it comes to any stories I really enjoy. That being said, I don't necessarily enjoy stories that are only and PURELY about the romance since that gets boring for me. I am not a fan of romance novels, for example. And my love of romance doesn't always translate to my RP. Roen was without any kind of romantic attachment for almost a year. I was having plenty of fun RPing without it as it was. But the injection of romance into any story can add a wonderful dimension for both storytelling and character development, so when it did happen, it was fraught with plenty of tension and conflict, and for Roen, it eventually ended in a tragedy. I like romances that are complicated. Chemistry has to be there between the characters, and the growth of the relationship has to believable, but for a romance to hold any interest for me, it has to have layers of complexity, whether it be differences in philosophy, personality, or circumstances... and if there are obstacles to be overcome. As others have already stated, characters AND relationships grow when they face and overcome adversities together. But if Roen's story is an example of anything, it's that my love for romance does not always translate to happy endings... >__>

“I’d be lying if I said I’ll miss yer charming company.” Bellows chewed on a piece of dried jerky as he leaned against the wooden post of the Dragonhead stables, his arms crossed in front of his chest. Despite the the fact that he was overseeing the preparation of the chocobos, once Roen had made her hurried exit from the inn, Bellows seemed content in letting the paladin do the rest of the prepping. When she did not deign to answer him, he snorted. “Or your persistent chattering.” Roen fastened the buckle of her saddle for the third time, pausing only when Goldwind let out an impatient quark as to protest to her forceful tugging. But the paladin continued in her double and triple checking of all of the equipment, while waiting for the rest of the company to exit from their abode. The small bowl of mushroom chanterelle that she had sampled in the kitchens still warmed her belly and her thoughts still swam with the lingering emotions of the talk she had with Gideon. She was grateful for the cold morning winds that cooled her cheeks and calmed the slight puffiness to her eyes. She felt her mask of composure securely back in place by the time Edda and Gideon exited the inn, making their way towards their respective mounts with their bags in tow. “The trip should not be too taxing and the weather should hold,” Roen greeted them without a smile, her tone businesslike. She spared Edda a single nod before squinting to the grey skies above. “Heavy snowfall has yet to start, with any luck, we may only see a light flurry.” The paladin paused in her task as she counted only two out of the three. She looked beyond Edda and Gideon towards the inn again. “Is everyone ready?” "Gideon is ready, yes, as to be expected." Edda looked back to Roen with a quizzical face. "As for Khadai, he should be, but I've not seen him. He knows we are to leave..." She turned to Gideon. "Did you see the Au Ra fellow at all? The tall, horned fellow, unusually brusque." "I have oft heard of this individual, Miss, but have not yet encountered anyone by the description." The valet’s answer was calm and unruffled as usual. "If Miss so desires, I can seek him out?" A sharp whistle caught all of their attention. "He's outside the walls," Bellows called out, jerking his head westward. "Communing with the snow or some nonsense. Best get on out there before there are more bodies laying around, eh?" Roen gave the Hyur a pointed glare before she took the reins and led her bird out to the road leading west. She could not deny that she was relieved to part from the Midlander’s grating company. Edda and Gideon followed suit behind her, mounting their birds after fastening their bags onto the saddle. Khadai had been easy enough to spot, he was sitting crosslegged in the snow with his eyes closed. The blued length of steel was secure in its harness, and on his back was the simple furred pack slung over his left shoulder. Gone were the borrowed clothing, and returned were the winter furs and leathers, and the metal spaulder covering an exposed arm. Roen was silently glad to see that his armor no longer bore the bloodstains from before. His pose seemed almost meditative, but he was quick to bolt to his feet upon their approach. "The trek to Ishgard should not take more than a few bells." Roen nodded her greeting to the Xaela to which she was rewarded with a nod. An awkward moment’s pause fell between all of them as Roen glanced to the three gathered. She was not certain if they already knew each other and if she was the last one that was surprised by Gideon’s sudden appearance this morning. The paladin finally cleared her throat. "So we will all be traveling to Ishgard together." She made an absent gesture at the two behind her. "I trust you all know each other?" "No," Edda answered, shaking her head. She gestured to the man next to her. "Khadai, this is Gideon. He is my valet-" The noblewoman stopped abruptly, frowning. "He is... a companion of mine. Skilled, and knowledgable." The valet inclined his head from atop the chocobo. "My duty is to attend to the mistress's needs as pertaining to more commonplace and routine matters. When the situation calls for it, I should be glad to receive sir's guidance on the navigational matters at hand--" He stopped shortly as the Xaela he was addressing crossed his arms and turned to face westward, seemingly eager to start their journey. Gideon gave a sidelong glance to Edda as if to wait for her response. When Edda just gave Gideon an apologetic shrug of the shoulder and spurred her bird into a slow walk, Roen narrowed her eyes. Ever blunt and impatient, this Xaela. She too mounted Goldwind, clucking her tongue to start an easy relaxed stride. When she spoke her again, her tone was crisp. "Mister North is very knowledgeable and learned in all manners of etiquette and culture. Perhaps he can give you a few advice on what to expect in Ishgard?" She ventured a glance at the valet. "That is, if you have anything that may be of assistance to someone completely new to the area. And the society." "I shall engage in queries as they become relevant," the Xaela rumbled as he fell into long strides next to the three riders. "It is needless to ask without specific purpose." Gideon nodded genially, apparently expecting such a response. "I shall endeavor to keep such knowledge at the forefront of my mind, should sir require it under duress." The paladin let out a quick exhale through her nostrils. Her lips opened as if to protest again, before she closed them shut thinking the better of it. She always knew Gideon to hold his composure under almost any circumstance, and likely some abrupt mannered foreigner would be no different. She spurred Goldwind onward to take point. As Dragonhead faded to a distant vision of white stones behind them, the sky began to greet them with a light flurry of snow. The whistling winds called from the mountains to the north and filled the silence as the three riders kept an easy pace. Khadai maintained long strides without any obvious difficulty, keeping up with the longer-legged chocobos despite being afoot. Occasionally he would break out into a short jog when his pace slowed in comparison, but otherwise he managed to keep in step with the rest. It was when Roen could no longer see Dragonhead behind them that she turned to Edda. She tilted her head slightly to motion her forward. "Edda, may we speak...?" Edda snapped to attention, seemingly lost in thought before. She gave the paladin a bewildered expression before nodding quickly. "Y-yes, of course," she said, her cheeks slightly flushing. She straightened in her saddle and quickened her bird’s stride to catch up to the paladin. Roen pulled slightly ahead of the group, as if to distance their conversation from the men behind them. "I just... wanted to apologize. For before." The paladin kept her voice low. She only glanced to Edda for a short period of time, before turning her eyes back onto the road. "I should not have presumed things for you." "No," Edda said succinctly, but it was not with malice. "You should not have. But it happens enough that I am quite used to it - it is safer that way, some would argue." The noblewoman too looked to the view ahead, but Roen could feel a sidelong glance returning to her. "I understand," Edda continued, a smile in her voice. "It is only natural to be concerned for the safety of a dear friend." The paladin released a white puff of breath through her nose, her gaze bowing just a little with a nod. "...Aye." Her own response was soft, pensive. She chewed her lower lip for a moment longer, pondering her next words. When she spoke again, it was even quieter. "And I owe you more gratitude for..." The paladin glanced behind them with but a slightest turn of her head, but it was obvious who she was not quite looking at. She just pursed her lips and shrugged, leaving the rest unsaid. "Naturally." Edda nodded. "I am happy to do favors for those who ask it of me. Though I would have done so without your prompting, truth be told." She paused and looked to face the woman fully, her expression muted, but sincere. "You need not worry. I will see to his safety." Roen turned to meet the noblewoman’s gaze, and even though she did not say anything more, there was a sense of relief that bloomed within. She nodded again, sparing only the briefest of glances to those behind them before turning her attention back to the road. That was when Khadai broke his silence. “Are the animals wont to leave meals unfinished?” The paladin turned to the strange question, glancing first at the Xaela then following his gaze to an odd sight off the side of the road. She spotted the flock of carrion birds circling the sky in the distance. That spectacle in and of itself was nothing out of the ordinary, but as her gaze drifted downward, the paladin found herself squinting. Beneath the birds, there was an odd silhouette that stood out against the white snowy canvas. Something was protruding from the ground at a skewed angle, weighed by an object that was hanging from the top of the long shaft. She brought her bird to a stop, leaning slightly to try and get a better look. “No, they are not,” she muttered. "Just a carcass from a hunt, perhaps." The noblewoman too was craning her neck to get a better look, but her tone was nervous, hesitant. “Let me just check this out first--” Roen began, only to watch Khadai as he turned and darted off into a long loping run towards the scene in question. The paladin could only let out an impatient sigh as she watched his fur pack bouncing against his left shoulder, the Au Ra making a surprisingly quick pace through the snowdrift. She clucked her tongue for Goldwind to follow. She could hear Edda and Gideon following suit, although at a slower pace than her own. When Roen caught up to the Xaela, it became obvious that it was no remnant of a hunt that they had discovered. A thick wooden stake had been driven into the ground, its sharpened end pointed to the sky. And from its apex hung a limp, lifeless body, impaled through the chest. A pale horned female Au Ra hung from the end of the stake, her eyes lifeless, staring in frozen horror, and her mouth agape in a silent scream.

"Do these glasses make you think that I can't kick your ass?"

Roen stepped out through the heavy double doors of the Saint Reymanaud Cathedral, her eyes squinting as the darkness of the church was washed away by the snow-brushed brightness of a rare luminous afternoon. Snowflakes spun and twirled in their descent, and her breaths still puffed in a cloud of white steam before her lips. It was four bells after the midday, always on the sixth sun of each sennight. She had returned to this place of worship after their first two encounters; the first one was by chance, and second one by fortuitous happenstance. Then in the following sennights, she had found herself waiting for the same bell and day to return. It was all to speak to her anonymous confessor--a Duskwight knight of Ishgard and a fellow shield bearer. Roen still knew not the Elezen’s name, but it mattered little. She knew of his proud family, who held their duty to Ishgard above all else. She knew of their allegiance to the Holy See and their honored tradition of serving as dragoons. The paladin had also learned that her polite and well-spoken confidant had chosen to go against his family’s wishes and bear a shield instead. Was it that common thread--both of them being shield bearers--that drew her to seek his advice? Or was it the security in anonymity that she felt some freedom in sharing some of her deepest doubts? As they spoke under the arched roof of the cathedral, Roen found more commonality between her and the knight. Even though she could not ultimately admit to the exact nature of her own losses, she had shared with this stranger her guilt in failing someone who was precious to her. And he in turn, admitted the same. The blame the knight held for himself in losing his sister still seemed to weigh heavily upon him, even though he admitted it was a distant scar rather than an open wound. The paladin found herself promising to pray for his sister’s welfare, if a prayer ever left her lips. Where as he feared the worst, she held some hope that the one he held dear, still lived. Was that the reason then, that Roen felt free to admit her own guilt about her brother, the next time they spoke? While the Duskwight had forfeited his honor and duty to try and save his sister, and eventually be ostracized by his family for his sacrifice, Roen had done the very opposite. In losing someone she loved, she ran away from her family and friends. And when Delial and Kage sought her out to ask her for her aid, the paladin turned them away. She was not ready to face her brother or anyone else that cared for her. Roen had worked so hard to construct her fortress of apathy, she was not prepared to tear it down yet. But the fate of her missing brother still plagued her thoughts. Roen told herself time and again that she had sent the most capable tracker to aid them. If Kiht could not help Delial and Kage, who else could? Certainly not she. The paladin told Delial more than once that she did not want to be involved. The Highlander had acquiesced begrudgingly. The keen woman seemed to suspect that something had happened, but kept her silence on the matter. There was fire lit within her amber eye that Roen knew that Delial would not stop until Gharen was found. And she had Kage standing by her side. That should have eased her mind. That should have been enough. And yet… She could not ignore that small sliver of doubt whenever the apprehensions returned. She confessed those thoughts to the Duskwight knight; since he had been exiled by his family for choosing his sister over all else, Roen could not imagine that her revelation would be met with anything but disapproval. But no such censure came. He asked for more details on the circumstances, but when all was said and done, he sympathized with her need for solitude. Even from her family. He also offered gentle encouragement to allow herself to face her fears and her loved ones when she was ready. “What is it that you said about forgiveness?” Roen had said in response. “Another gifting such to me would mean little… if I am not ready to accept it." The Duskwight then answered her with something she was not expecting, a smile. "I must say, it is refreshing to have one listen so intently to my words." That made the paladin pause, blinking. There was a reluctant and unexpected curl to the corner of her lips as well. "You have no idea... how your words stayed with me." She shook her head again but this time it was with less sobriety. “You are wiser than you know.” The knight only smiled wider with a dip of his head. "Ah, mayhaps I am then. I would not have considered such before." She exhaled, a quick release of breath with a hint of rebuke. "Then perhaps it is I who is out of sorts. I usually do not pay such close attention to strangers." Her tone remained neutral, but some of that somber cloud was dissipating from her mind. "Believing a deity speaking through you and all that." The Elezen grinned but shook his head. "I cannot say I would ever claim such for myself!" Roen pursed her lips, rolling her eyes slightly. "Would I be getting better guidance from the clergy then?" His grin was now ear to ear. "I do believe you stated you much preferred mine words to that of the robed clergy." "At least our attentiveness is mutual,” she acquiesced begrudgingly. “Aye, shield bearer. I do think your wisdom exceeds that of the clergy." Perhaps it was the fact that the organs had just finished their song and was preparing another, that her words carried a bit too far. Another Elezen noble seated on the pews ahead of them gave her an incredulous glare over his shoulder. The paladin pressed her lips together as she glanced away, clearing her throat. Amusement only seemed to grow on the knight’s visage as he shook his head at her. He offered the noble a polite dip of his head. "Quite mutual, indeed." He turned to her with an earnest smile. "I am grateful for these conversations, however." Roen widened her eyes, a sense of relief washing over her. “Are you? Whatever for? It is I who should be grateful. I always seem to come here and demand answers from you, Ser Knight. And never return the same consideration." The Elezen quirked a brow, apparently bewildered. "Is such how you view our interactions? Truly?" He canted his head in thought. “I believe I have learned much from speaking with you as well as listening. I have stared at mine self and mine own wounds. You have never demanded anything of me, my friend." The paladin chewed her lower lip. "I am... glad," she finally said softly. "In my own struggles, I know I have only asked. And asked again. It is you who have found a way to turn that into something hopeful and benign.” He inclined his head in a nod. "And I have but answered, conversed where I can. Tis enjoyable, truly." She snorted softly. "Enjoyable. Surely, you are just humoring me." The knight arched his brow again, with a hint of an admonishment in his voice. "Were it not, would I return time and again to speak with a woman whom I do not know?" Roen blinked. "...And here I thought I was the clever one, somehow discerning your schedule on visiting this place." "Truly?” A look of amusement split across his face. “I thought I found myself here in times that you would arrive." A hand rose to cover her mouth, and hide her sheepish expression. "Well then." She wrinkled her nose. "I suppose we were both clever and yet not as clever as we thought." "What a strange pair we are.” He then flashed her a bright, genuine grin. Roen regarded him oddly, but her expression eased with a slight curl of her lips. "Indeed." She exhaled, organ music filling the silence between them. "Gratitude," she said quietly. "Much and more back to you,” he nodded. Then as if remembering herself, she inhaled quickly and rose. "I should go, however. I have indulged myself long enough." The Elezen rose as she did. "But of course. It was, as always, a pleasure." He bowed deeply at the waist. Roen bowed in return, her frame having lost much of the tension from before. "I will... continue to think myself clever... next sennight." There is an upward tug to one corner of her lips. To that, the Duskwight laughed. "And I shall likewise do so. Be well, Shieldbearer." A stranger and a confidant… Roen raised her hand to shield her eyes as she looked up at the sky, the distant shafts of sunlight somehow breaking through the eternal grayness of this wintry place. That was when her reverie was broken by an approach of a familiar figure as Stray Oak lumbered up the steps leading to the Cathedral. “Deneith! Ser Tournes is looking for you.” The Hellsguard gave her a shrug when she quirked a questioning brow. “Blacke and Fenco again. They didn’t report back in time. He probably wants ya ta go track ‘em down.” The paladin let out a long exasperated sigh and nodded. Those two were becoming a thorn on her side when it came to their indolence. “I didn’t know ya were a religious type,” Oak said, eyeing the cathedral with some measure of suspicion. Roen shrugged, a small amused curl to one corner of her lips rising as she began to walk away. “I am not. But I have found that confessions are surprisingly cathartic.” [[Events that follow can be found here]]

Things never bode well when the day sneaks up on me. I never oversleep. Roen took the stairs two at a time, annoyance lengthening her stride. She fastened the buckles on her gauntlet as she tried to dismiss the haze that lingered over her thoughts. She'd awakened from her bed to realize that bells had already passed since the sunrise; she had never been a late riser for as long as she could remember, but recently, she had been waking feeling more exhausted every sun. Crossing the courtyard, she saw that Goldwind already being saddled up. Roen paused as she spotted Bellows near the stables, overlooking the preparations for her journey. It was strange to see him aid in such things, but when he gave her a mock salute with an unpleasant smirk, she could see that he was eager to see her go. The paladin did not give the sellsword another moment of thought. Her focus needed to be on the journey to Ishgard that awaited. Before that, she needed to speak to Edda. She felt a slight pinch of dread as she approached the noblewoman’s quarters, recalling the conversation with Khadai the night before. Even if she was looking out for her friend’s best interest, it still did not sit well with her that she was trying to decide for other people. But surely, Edda could not actually want to continue on in this journey... “Come in,” came the soft response after Roen knocked on the door. The paladin entered to find Edda sitting on the edge of the bed, her hair still loose and uncombed since her slumber. She was buttoning up her gown, a grey toned coat with tailored sleeves. Completed with black gloves and black leggings, the woman looked every bit the aristocrat Roen knew her to be despite her disheveled hair. “Did you sleep well?” Roen inquired quietly. "I always sleep well," Edda said softly as she clasped the last button into place and straightened. She swept her hair neatly over her shoulder. "What can I do for you?" "I thought we could speak alone for a bit," Roen said in a neutral tone. "I am not certain how much opportunity we will have on the road for some privacy." "That is fine. Of course. What is on your mind?" Roen pursed her lips in hesitation at first, not knowing what subject to breach first. She took a few more steps to stand in front of the woman. "First, you are free to go. The knight captain deemed yesterday's affair resolved. He sees no reason to suspect either of you. And he has allowed me to accompany you both to Ishgard." She glanced over her shoulder toward the door. "I... returned last night with the sword. My apologies that I tried to wake you. I am glad for your rest. I did return the sword to your companion." "I see. That is fortunate to hear." Edda rested her hands on her lap, her thumbs tracing over her fingers, shifting between each one in a seeming rhythm. "That your Captain was able to see reason speaks well for Dragonhead." She looked up from her hands at Roen, a slight tug at the corners of her lips. "Are you displeased with his decision?" The paladin blinked, clearly not expecting that. "Displeased? Why would you ask that?" "Do you wish to go to Ishgard?" Roen shifted her gaze, looking to an absent point on the wall behind Edda. Her answer to that had vacillated ever since the idea was proposed. "I have no opinion about it either way." That was not quite the truth. "I have been to Ishgard multiple times now... so I am familiar with the route. Both of you could use a guide." Edda exhaled slowly, humming through it in a deep tone. "That is true. I for one am most pleased by the news - I am sure Khadai will be as well." She lifted her left hand and held it up against the dim morning light now streaming through the window. Fingers spread, the woman glared at the back of her hand for a moment, as if willing herself to look through it. Her eyes returned back to Roen, her arm still outstretched. "You, however, seem rather listless. Did something happen?" The paladin shifted in her stance, fighting the reluctance that held her thoughts hostage. Was this not the reason she came to speak to Edda after all? "I asked you last eve, how long you planned on traveling with Khadai." Roen exhaled, raising her eyes steadily to the noblewoman. "I asked him to find another guide in your stead." Edda lowered her outstretched arm slowly, back to rest the hand in her lap. She bowed her head, her expression sobering slightly. "Ah. I thought you might. If not you, then him. One of you, either way. And now it is both, yes?" Roen knitted her brow in thought. "I am no longer of the mind that he is dangerous or... suspect in his motives.” She canted her head, as if to try and glean Edda’s mood. The woman’s enigma was something that Roen had come to accept long ago, the noblewoman always having her mask of polite decorum in place. And yet they had always spoken with honesty in the past. “Serving as a guide through a land beleaguered by war… it is not something I thought would appeal to you." "Hmph.” Edda scoffed, and looked to her left to glare at the wall. "It does not appeal to me, no. A great many things do not appeal to me - but I do what I must. I know the limits of my own abilities far better than anyone else. This was something I chose to do." She looked back up at Roen with a stony expression, eyes searching. "Yet I am not so brazen as to intrude where I am not wanted. Why even see me as far as Ishgard? I am perfectly capable of returning to Gridania now, on my own." That made the paladin pause, staring back at the woman. It took her a moment before she could respond, and it was with a rueful twinge to her lips. "Ah. Then you have my apologies, Edda. It is not your intent that I doubted, nor do I seek to deprive you of what you want to do. But..." She sighed, her shoulders dipping slightly. "I did not want to see you come to harm because of your good intentions." Roen paused, recalling the conversation from the night before. "Khadai seems to be on an exploratory journey of his own. He honestly does not know where he is to head next. How long did you intend to stay with him?" "As long as it took to discern what his intentions were," Edda said evenly. "Whether they be for good, or not." "I asked him the same. His purpose for being here. He does not know." The paladin exhaled, her expression softening. "But last night he did join in the offensive against an aevis attack. After watching him rush into battle to help those who were threatening to arrest him, I no longer think him to hold ill will against those here. Despite his bloody history." "You seem to trust him a great deal now." The noblewoman observed simply. Though her words seemed unfazed, a shadow was cast over her expression, her face darkening. "Nay, I still know him not. But he seems to be willing to answer questions with candor even if it may implicate him." Roen looked back at Edda, her eyes slightly narrowing. "He even told me that he killed three masked assailants in the Shroud. Something that he suspected, you came across." "Yes, I did," Edda responded in an even yet guarded tone. "You hid that fact... for his sake?" "Mostly my own." "Your sake?" Roen canted her head. "You had come across them after the fact." "And?" The paladin’s expression hardened. The shift in Edda's mood with her short taciturn answers were obvious. Roen could not help but mirror it. "And nothing. It is done." Her own words were clipped. "I have not spoken to my knight captain on the matter, nor will I. You witnessed the aftermath, if you feel that what you found warrants further investigation, then I will leave that in your hands." "It will be handled, of that you have my assurance." Edda paused, and studied her expression. "Would you have preferred me to put him to the sword?" "Nay. Not after..." Roen shook her head. "I do not doubt your intentions, Edda. I just wished that you would have at least been honest with me." The paladin did not want to give voice to her doubts about the woman, nor the sting she felt when she had suspected more duplicity. "Never mind. Perhaps I presumed too much." "It would have served little purpose at that point in time, other than to further your own doubts of him. Had that occurred, the series of events that followed may not have gone as smoothly as they did. There is little cause in withholding the truth - but there is a time and place for it." Roen’s frown only deepened at Edda’s response. A part of her knew it was a reasonable course of action and yet… Two knocks sounded from the door. Roen ignored it. "Very well,” the paladin turned back to Edda with her stony mask back in place. “You can discuss with Khadai whether you intend to continue on with him. That is up to you. I will not presume more than I already have." "The decision has already been made, Roen. Surely you realize that." Edda spoke softly, then turned to the door. "Come in." The door opened to admit a familiar figure of a man, a well dressed valet by his uniform with dark well trimmed hair framing his face. He entered with a small tray--it contains two metal mugs, snow-stained, but with steam rising from them. He strode past the two women to set the tray down on the table first before inclining his head politely to the both of them. "Mistress and Miss," Gideon said evenly. Roen stared, eyes wide at the man. "I have prepared a bracing drink using the kitchens downstairs; a heated brew infused with chocolate. The original recipe called for a dusting of kukuru powder, which the serving staff are sadly lacking. I have improvised as necessary." Gideon gave another bow toward Edda. "I was informed Mistress was entertaining company; the second mug is yours, Miss, should you wish to take it." The paladin was frozen still as the valet bowed to her. No words came. "Thank you, Gideon," Edda said softly. "Dishes have been prepared for yourself and the assorted occupants and guardsmen of the camp. Is there anything further you require?" Edda only shook her head at Gideon, before rising and taking her mug of hot chocolate. She sipped it twice before leaving the room without a word, and shut the door quietly behind her. Roen stared at the door in silence. . "Very good, Mistress." Gideon said to Edda's closed door, apparently accustomed to doing so. He glanced to the paladin for a moment, inclined his head politely then also turned for the door. "When did you get here, Mister North?" the paladin finally blurted, her voice hoarse. Gideon turned back around with a nod, his movements smooth and practiced. "I arrived in the early hours of the morning, Miss, shortly in the aftermath of whatever incident concerned the aevis horde. As matters seemed to be under control, I inquired as to the particulars of Miss' lodgings, and made myself appropriately useful." Roen swallowed. She found herself staring at the distant wall, not looking towards the valet. Seeing him here, it had unnerved her. "I see. Are you going to accompany Miss Edda to Ishgard then..?" They were just words to fill the silence. "I am duty-bound to accompany my mistress wherever she may require my services, Miss." The man’s response was placid and unaffected as ever. "Then… you are satisfied in her occupation?" These were questions she had wanted to ask Edda. One of many things the paladin had wanted to broach the woman about before it was curtailed. Roen had entrusted Gideon’s employment and safety to the noblewoman before she disappeared. Before she had sought out Nero at Aleport. Before so many things happened. But now as she found herself standing here before the man who had been her confidant and source of comfort through most of all that happened, Roen could not bare to meet him in the eyes. Nor exchange any other words than pleasantries. Was it because aside from Kiht, Gideon was the only other person that Roen had shared the news of Nero’s death? Not the manners in which he died, but with Nero’s involvement in the death of Gideon’s former masters, it was something that Roen felt at least the valet deserved to know. "Miss is occasionally reluctant to assign me any actual duties, insisting that I put my own needs first. Aside from this eccentricity, I am managing." Roen barely heard the words. Gideon's expression could only be described as politely blank. "...Did... Did you get my letter..?" "The one heralding your disappearance? Indeed so, Miss." "You need not worry about... avenging your former masters." She set her jaw, and despite her attempts to stay neutral on the matter, her fingers were curled into tight fists by her side. "At least... on one account." "I am sorry to hear, Miss." Gideon bowed, but this time, he remained bent for a couple of seconds longer - not an expression of servitude but apparent solemnity. It comforted her not. "...are you?" She shot him a look, not liking the stirring of emotions within. "Is this not what you wanted?" "Wanted, Miss?" Her throat felt constricted, and she felt anger rising from within. She was not sure who it was directed at. "There was a time you wanted death brought to those who were responsible for what befell your masters. This... is a good thing... aye?" Her words were turning sharper as she continued. “The end to a murderer. A violent extremist." "It is true, Miss, that I sought revenge for those who had destroyed what is close to me. If you recall, Miss, I learned of Lazarov's culpability after having already known that he was a significant person to you. Though I did despise him, my desire to specifically see him dead lasted seconds." His voice softened. "I am... sorry that events transpired in such a way as to cause Miss distress. I am sure there was... little other course." Roen stared at him, her lips pressed tightly upon each other. "He is dead, Mister North. You no longer need to spare my feelings about the man." "As you say, Miss. I am merely clarifying. What I wanted proved to be something else." Her head dipped low, her hair falling over her eyes. A long pause of silence fell between them. "What you wanted. What he wanted. Must we know these things too late?" "My intent, Miss, was to remove myself from the equation, that my desires might not have undue effect. I imagine I sought something similar to what Miss pursued, though." The paladin shot him a dark look. "What I pursued was a hopeless wish. Born of .... 'singular devotion'... Mister North. It brought me nothing but pain and regret. I just... I just need you to tell me that at least you... at least someone is better off for this." "That, at least, is unquestionable, Miss." He looked at her, expression still calm and assuring. "But would you resent them for it?" "What if I did?" “I have long said that I am no man to judge, Miss, and I am happy to serve. If you require a vessel for blame, I would happily volunteer." Her face twisted with indignation. "That is not... that is NOT what I..." She felt herself tremble. She hated the fact that his very presence shattered the composure that she had been working so hard to maintain. It was as if the last many moons spent on constructing her walls and tending to the wounds that were now starting to show even the barest hint of closure, were all being undone. Was she so unprepared to see him? "Miss' hot chocolate is getting cold." He observed quietly. Her eyes flared with that, and she spun to snatch up the cup of hot chocolate and hurl it across the room. "Do think that matters?!" she screamed. The metal cup bent as it crashed violently against the stone brick, the hot chocolate then spilling to the floor and staining the rug. Gideon said nothing, for a moment, just watching her patiently. Then after a pause, the valet cleared his throat. "Normally, that is asked as a rhetorical question, Miss." Roen crossed the room again, long angry strides bringing her before the butler. "Are you going to lecture me now? On the ins and outs of rhetoric? Or will you simply bring me more cups of hot chocolate?" Her face burned, her voice shook. "Do you think I feel anything but resentment seeing you here?" That was not the truth, and yet those were the angry words that tumbled forth. Gideon raised a single eyebrow but said nothing. "My disappearance was intentional. I wanted nothing that reminded me of--" She stopped herself, shaking her head. She did not want to even say his name. A part of her knew that this was all in frustration, that Gideon was not deserving of any of it, but she did not care. "You being here… it only brings back all the things I do not wish to think of." When he said nothing, standing still with his hands behind his back, she spun away from him. "So do not stand there and be some willing martyr. I am furious, Gideon. All I feel is regret and... rage.. and..." She bowed her head. "And I am tired of... of blaming myself." Gideon still said nothing, even though his full attention was upon her. Roen spun back around, finding his silence and his serene demeanor absolutely infuriating. "Say something, Gideon. Tell me I am a fool. Or that my anger is misplaced. Or that it will fade. Or my sorrow is unjustified. Or..." Her eyes darted around the room frantically, as if something, anything would give her the answers that he would not. "Say SOMETHING." "I am not in the habit of dispensing false information, Miss." Gideon sighed and approached her. He closed his eyes for a moment in thought but when he opened again, he spoke slowly and with clarity. "I am no man to judge the validity of your feelings. Nor can I presume commonality between our having lost someone, blaming oneself, or being consumed with any given emotion, whether joyful or painful. If the sight of me makes you seethe, then I shall endeavor not to inconvenience you. Otherwise, I can only continue to support you as I have done in the past, providing small comforts where they may ease your mind, if briefly." His gaze fell on the hot chocolate trailing between stones. "I cannot in good conscience tell you, Miss, that the pain will fade. What I can tell you is that it may be wielded." A quiet gasp escaped her lips, her eyes now burning and glistening. She took one step back away from him, stunned by his words. Gideon turned from her and went to where the metal mug lay on the floor. Setting it upright against the wall, he began to scrub the floor. "I..." she whispered after a long pause. "I cannot breathe... Gideon." Auburn locks fell heavily before her eyes as she stared at the floor and her vision blurred. "There are suns where I cannot... breathe...." The valet rose, and taking a slow breath, he moved closer to her side. He removed a handkerchief from his coat and lightly dabbed at her cheeks and eyes. “...Yes, Roen." Roen pressed her lips tightly upon each other to stifle the sobs that wanted to rise. She bowed her head, her forehead just coming to rest against his chest. She stayed there for a long quiet moment, unmoving. Gideon’s hand froze mid-dab, just hovering. But soon enough the paladin gathered herself and straightened, her hands swiping at her cheeks. She squared her shoulders and brushed her hair away. “I should get ready to go,” she said hoarsely, taking one step back from him. Gideon inclined his head, stepping back to their appropriate distance. "...Will you not eat first, Miss?" "I am not hungry. I have things to prepare. You should look to Edda." Roen shook her head and turned for the door, her last few words murmured under her breath. "My apologies for the..." She gave a sidelong glance to the wall and the stain there, but her gaze continued to drift to the man behind her without truly looking at him. Gideon cleared his throat somewhat guiltily. "I... DID prepare Miss's favorite. I thought the dish particularly complementary to these more wintry climes...?" That made her pause at the door, blinking. There was a sad tug to her lips as she looked over her shoulder at Gideon. Ever providing the small comforts… It only made her feel worse. The paladin shook her head, her forelocks falling loose again before her eyes. Without saying another word, she abruptly left the room, intent on heading out to the courtyard. But when she reached the doors that led outside, Roen paused. She stood still for a moment with her hand laid against the wooden grains, before she turned away from the exit and headed towards the kitchens.

"I hope you can remain a shield bearer. One without regrets." "Life oft has them, fellow shield bearer. We can only hope to carry the right ones in the end." Regrets. There were times when Roen had forgotten the weight of it. It was still there, like the cold that always pervaded Ishgard, but on some suns it was easier to ignore than others. Busying herself with fighting, patrolling, or just struggling to stay warm, daily tribulations would divert her attention so that even for just a few bells she carried on as if the last year had not happened. But in those rare moments where a smile or a laugh could have risen, Roen only felt a sense of emptiness inside, and it was then that she was reminded why she had come here. And in her periods of solitude, especially when the night fell, the memories returned. The paladin was thankful for her nightly patrols, for in the morning when she retired to her room, she immediately surrendered to sleep from exhaustion. Her mind seemed too tired to even dream. But in the few bells after she woke, before she was sent out on her next assignment, she had to seek out some other sort of a distraction within the city. And her steps led her once again to the Saint Reymanaud Cathedral. Despite the fact that the last time she sat within the church, the words that were imparted to her threatened to break her composure that eventually she fled her company, Roen found herself under the vaulted ceilings again, staring at the austere statue of Halone. And when the familiar voice greeted her from across the pews and the paladin recognized the Duskwight knight again, she was surprised that her apprehensions did not return. After all, was it not his words that made her return to this place for rumination? "More questions, I take it?" the Elezen asked quietly. "As ever.” She returned a polite nod to him. “I hear nothing but organ pipes here, and yet I continue to return to stare at a silent statue. I suppose the devout may glean more wisdom from this place.” The knight lowered his head with a quiet laugh before he rose and walked around the back to take a seat near her. "Mayhaps. Or mayhaps 'tis merely the calming presence which draws those near to such a place as this." Roen lowered her gaze, her tone one of apology. "I wish not to impinge upon your time of reflection, yet again." "If you were doing as such, would I have joined you here?" He waved a hand, nonchalant. "Be at ease, friend." Roen was not so quick to want to refuse his company this time. "Your words when we last spoke... they stayed with me.” Her confession was nearly drowned out by the blare of the organ. “I suppose, who better to ask than the person who imparted such wisdom?" He cast a sidelong glance her way. "It is my hope such was not of discomfort." The paladin met his gaze, her expression pensive. "Regret. It weighs upon me. You said... we hope to carry the right ones in the end. How does one know?" The Duskwight exhaled, seemingly considering her question for a moment. "Only in hindsight. In the moment we are distracted… and directly after, lost in our feelings and thoughts in what may have been or could have been. I am oft given to consider things logically. Weighing for and against for every decision and the outcomes thereafter." He sighed quietly. "Make no mistake, regrets, by definition are not pleasant." He glanced back to the paladin after a pause. "But some? Some can be lived with." "Hindsight." Roen exhaled, her frame sinking into her seat slightly. “We have no choice in that, aye? What is the alternative?" "The alternative?” The Elezen arched a brow. “To become lost adrift in the past, forever doubting, forever questioning. Never moving beyond the moment and moments of action or inaction.” He slightly shifted in his seat, his expression intent. “You must decide. Will you merely carry the matter or learn from it? The past, as they say, can repeat itself for the unfortunate." The paladin stared at her fists on her lap, avoiding his scrutiny. "And yet, if you cannot reconcile that you did the right thing, if you forever regret and question..." "Do you believe you did the right thing?" A long pause followed. This was the same question she had asked herself many times over since Aleport. "I did. I believed, for many suns, nay sennights that followed, that it was the only choice I could have made." A deep frown darkened her expression. "But… I have only recently discovered something that I did not know at the time." The Elezen turned back to the statue, crossing his arms. "Mm. This was something you had no way of knowing, I take it?" Roen shook her head. "I thought I could live with what I did." Her voice was barely above a whisper. "That the sacrifice that was made... the price was something I was willing to pay. But the cost... turned out to be so much greater." "You cannot change the past, however." Her head dipped in acknowledgement, and stayed there, held low. "Would that I could." "A wish shared by countless, of that I can say with certainty. No. All that we who live can do is move forward. T'would be a disgrace to those who cannot, to do any less." He turned his head back towards her with a warm smile. "Perhaps it is naive to think as such, but I am of the mind that as long as one draws breath, there can be hope. Scars serve to remind of the wound itself, as it takes time for them to heal.” "You seem hopeful, shield bearer.” Her own voice sounded hollow in its sentiment. He was naive. She wanted to tell him so, this stranger who still bore hope for the world despite the pains and the darkness that pervaded it. And yet, she wanted that unwavering faith for herself again. She narrowed her eyes on the Elezen. "I would guess you are my senior by many years yet. Do you have scars of your own?" The knight nodded slowly. "Of course. Scars come to us all, though as we have agreed, those who carry shields oft are prone to being wounded while protecting others." “I thought, bearing a shield would be the most honorable and unquestionably the right thing to do.” Roen sighed. “The thought of being able to protect others... it called to me. And yet I found that in trying to protect everyone, to save everyone, I failed so many." The paladin hung her head once more, her tone one of remorse. "My hubris blinded me to the possibility that I would fail. And the consequences it would bring." The knight’s voice remained calm, soothing. "And yet, in the desire to save many, you have done so. Not all as none… none among us could do such. While we have failed few, I am certain many more have been saved." Roen felt a constricting grip around her heart. "But..." She peered back at him, struggling to keep her composure. But in this, she could not. "What if that one person you failed... was the one you wanted to save most of all?" The serenity in the knight’s countenance faded then, as he met her gaze only for an instant before he looked away. He bowed his head and his dark hair covered his face, hiding his expression from hers. She saw his lips part, but no sound came, not for several moments more. When he finally spoke, his voice had lowered, perhaps a sign of the wound she had inadvertently found. "Then… we resolve to be better,” he said quietly without looking up. “To never let such things happen again beneath our watch.” Roen watched him in silence. It may have been his own sadness, or the fact that this stranger who had only been a source of consoling smiles and steadfast hope had wounds of his own... that she found her own melancholy lessening somewhat. He was not so naive after all. "Is this the scar you bear?" When the Elezen looked back to her, it was with a sad twinge to his smile. "More than one, I am afraid. But yes. It is." "How long?" she whispered. "How long before the wounds closed..?" The Duskwight exhaled slowly. "That I cannot say. The wound has healed and yet at times I feel the pangs of the injury. Oft due to memories, a sight shared, promises made. It is sad to know such ebbs and flows with time only serving to lessen the bite." Roen frowned. The memories of sights and promises… they were what plagued her thoughts. These were not words of comfort for her. "And you saved many at the cost of one?" "One saved me, I am afraid. And the other… saved yet sacrificed in one fell swoop." The paladin gave him a sidelong glance. "Would you make that choice again?" The knight curled a wistful smile, looking back to Halone. "I have asked myself such time and time again. If I were to have died then, all whom I have saved or helped in the time after… what would become of them? Would another aid them? Would they perish without me? Such is folly to think, in truth. And yet… what is the worth of one? Of myself?" He paused, as if to replay the memories in his mind’s eye. “She was sacrificed but yet may live. Otherwise, death was assured.” Roen watched him carefully, her brows knitting as she tried to understand the pieces of his own history he was offering. She did not want to pry further, but recognized the distant melancholy that colored his mood. "So perhaps all is not lost. There may still be hope for you shield bearer, that this scar will heal completely." "Time, as they say, shall tell the tale." He studied the statue in contemplation for a moment longer before looking back to the paladin. "Yet and still, I would not cut mine arm away to remove a scar. I must simply carry it." His expression had lost its amiable air, his countenance that of intent determination. Roen blinked, considering his words. "One day, perhaps I too will say the same about mine own. " She nodded, her own composure regained. "You at least give me some measure of hope of that possibility." The Elezen smiled, bowing his head politely. "I am grateful for that. Forgive my saying such, but you yet appear to be in short supply. By appearance alone." The paladin curled her lips in a reassuring expression, but no warmth rose from within. "I am afraid my wounds are still fresh." She turned back to Halone. "I pray that time will… lessen the bite someday. But the strength of your resolve... I have yet to discover it for myself." The knight too turned his gaze back to Halone. "Perhaps that too will come in time. I pray Halone will guide you to such." Roen took those words to heart, before she stood and bowed. "Gratitude, yet once again. It seems you are the one that answers my questions when I seek them from a silent deity." The knight stood as well, bowing in return. "Were I of the clergy, mayhaps I would say she merely speaks through me." He canted his head, his eyes studying her for a moment. The paladin’s expression softened. "I think your own scars and experiences do better." The Elezen returned a smile and a nod. "As of now… I will merely state I am glad to provide aid." "I shall leave you to your prayers, kind ser." "May Halone guide you, shield bearer. Be well." The hum of pipe organs had faded, at least for a moment, allowing the echo of Roen's bootsteps to crawl across the high ceiling as she exited the cathedral. She heard only her thoughts, however, but for the first time in a long time they weren't deafening.

AAAAH! I DO THIS! And it drives ME up the wall!! ("Why did I use that word twice..." "...In the SAME SENTENCE EVEN!" /headdesk) Although I can't say I've said the same about someone else's post while I am RPing. So I think (hope) that I am being overly critical about myself but it isn't as distracting to those I am RPing with.

I never correct someone during RP. The little text window is terribly limiting, I don't get to see my full post most of the time before I hit enter, and most of the time I am furiously typing. I know what I want to say, but my fingers sometimes skip a word or misspell something. I know it happens to me, and it can happen to anyone. I don't feel the need to correct that. Usually the person I am playing with can figure out what I was trying to say, although if it can be grossly misinterpreted, I will correct myself immediately (or two sentences later when I actually read what I said...). Else I would prefer that the scene just kept going, rather than be bogged down by corrections. If I keep making mistakes, I usually stare at the screen in disbelief, bonk my head a couple of times, and apologize in party chat (( )) ... but I still just keep the scene going.

Roen would be that girl who stares out the window during history lessons daydreaming. She is not a troublemaker though, and would immediately apologize if caught or asked a question that she obviously did not know the answers to since she wasn't paying attention. Book oriented studies and things that requires rote memorization, she gets bored easily, her thoughts wandering elsewhere. She is very good at athletics, and anything that requires coordination. Sports, dancing, drawing... name it she is all over it! Also quite competitive in those things she is good at. Roen would be either the bane or a favorite of her philosophy teacher though since she is opinionated and would be open to discussing anything. Her grades are average, good in some subjects, not so great in others. As for friends, she is not the popular girl; she likely has some geeky friends, and she wears loose, comfortable clothing. Kind of a straight arrow though, doesn't smoke, doesn't drink nor do drugs. She also doesn't act cute or feminine around boys, so others might mistake her for not liking them at all when in truth, she is kind of awkward about that.

Most of my RP throughout my history in FF, have been outside of the FC. Even though every FC I've been a member of have always been RP-oriented. I look to RPC more than my FC to find people to roleplay with, honestly. Not that the people in my FC weren't lovely. I just found more than enough outside of the FC to occupy my time. But I am hoping to change that with my current FC... at least soon.

They were supposed to be dragonkin. Roen stared at the bloodied men and women huddled on the ground, their hands shackled behind their backs. More bodies laid beyond them in the snow, crimson stains spattered beneath them and across the frozen landscape. Severed limbs and scattered weapons littered the road, as well as the overturned caravan that still billowed smoke from the conflict that had ended mere moments ago. Heretics. Roen had been sent to assist a squad of mercenaries and temple knights as they were to intercept what was thought to be a group aevis attacking a caravan on the road to Falcon’s Nest. But when they arrived, it was not dragonkin they found, but rather a group of armored men and women--declared to be heretics by the temple knights--attacking the convoy. Dragonkin were easy to identify. Scaled, horned monsters that bore fangs and claws as they tore into human flesh, Roen felt no hesitation in fighting such fiends. But these assailants were Elezen and Hyur; they wore the same faces as those she had defended, and spoke with same intelligence and fervor as any religious zealot that she had encountered within the walls of Ishgard. And now, with naught to comfort them but the anticipation of what was to come and the frozen embrace of the frigid breeze, the fires of pious belief that had fuelled their crusade had vanished and in its place knelt the desperate common peasants in tattered, rusted armour, barely mustering the energy to shoot baleful glances at their opponents. “Line them up!” Ser Marat shouted to the men. The mercenaries that Roen had accompanied then began to lift the chained captives up along the side of the road. Their knees trembled with each rough pull that forced them to kneel in the soft snow drift. The Elezen gave a nod to the rest of the temple knights who then began to draw their swords once more. The symphony of steel leaving scabbard caused one of the heretics to visibly cringe, and the knights grasped their weapons upright in both hands in practised stances. Though their faces were not visible beneath their helmets, their hardened gazes focusing on the heretics said enough: this was to be judgment. “What are you doing, ser?” Roen asked under her breath as she approached the commanding temple knight. Although Ser Marat had recognized her from their encounter in Brume many sennights ago and had accepted Ser Tournes’ offer to have her join his ranks for a sun, his expression quickly soured at the question. “Execution, Deneith.” Ser Marat said pointedly, in the same way that one might describe the current colour of the sky. The paladin's eyes widened. “Should they not undergo a trial?” The knight arched a contemptuous brow. “We witnessed their crimes against Ishgardian citizenry firsthand. They bore arms against the sanctioned knights of the Holy See. There is no ambiguity in their guilt, Deneith.” His words were clipped and scathing. “No trial is needed. Only the administration of their sentence.” A dark scowl twisted her expression as she turned from the Elezen to the scene on the road; the prisoners were put to their knees with their heads bent forward to expose the nape of their necks. The rest of the soldiers had their swords drawn and ready, standing almost completely still like statues or chess pieces. Roen wondered with dismay if this was a regular practice for them. The mercenaries and the knights all looked to Ser Marat for the final order, but it never came. A distant warning shout and the aggressive howl of a hunter's horn brought all eyes to the fore. Through the light flurry of snow appeared several riders, many of them armored. Contrasting sharply with the functional chainmail of the temple knights, the new arrivals wore shimmering silver plate mail, immaculate in their polish and make. Their faces were hidden by helmets topped with flourishing azure tassels, matched by brilliant barding donned by their chocobos. Ser Marat barked another order and the Ishgardians parted so they could approach. Only one rider rode forward, dressed in dark cerulean robes trimmed in silver, the insignia of Ishgard emblazoned upon his breast. His face was obscured by the cowl of a heavy woolen cloak, but his steps carried confidence as he strode up to Ser Marat and leaned close to confide in the temple knight. Roen was not within earshot of the conversation, but she could see the temple knight’s expression shifting from irritation to one of reluctant acceptance. “Of course we will comply, Inquisitor Bellamont,” was all the paladin could hear from their exchange, bitter words only barely kept from being uttered from behind clenched teeth. But she watched Ser Marat give a deep bow to the head rider, who now visibly wore robes of the Inquisitor under his heavy wool cloak. A second rider -- a lean, aged Elezen -- rode forward, dark eyes narrowed with disdain as he looked down the length of his long nose. He, too, was dressed in the cerulean robes of the Inquisition, but he was lacking in the first inquisitor's shroud. His hawk-like features glared balefully at the execution line, and it was impossible to tell if his scorn was for the heretics or the knights. “Give praise to Halone, for the bell of your death has been belayed.” His eyes swept the row of heretics, many of them who now looked upon him with an expression of shocked relief. “All these transgressors are under arrest by the authority of the Inquisition.” Roen exhaled, some tension lost from her shoulders. She never thought she would be relieved to see an Inquisitor, much less witness them granting what seemed to be a mercy to heretics. “Rise to your feet, sinners. Some of you will be afforded the fortuity of atonement. Raise your voices in both praise and sorrow for the tribulations you shall face, for should you conquer them, even you may be redeemed.” A few questioning glances were exchanged between the mercenaries, but the knights were immediate to obey. Such was the authority wielded by the Inquisition. The heretics were brought to their feet and lined up, leather collars clasped to their necks as they were strung together and marched away “Where there is fear, we carry light.” The Elezen’s cold voice rang clear as a bell as he and his armored soldiers disappeared into the snowfall along with the prisoners. Roen breathed a sigh of relief as she watched them ride away. More than a few of Ser Marat’s men grumbled in seeming disappointment as they began to gather up what was left of the caravan, but the paladin remained staring after the Inquisitor and his company. It was the first time since Roen's arrival to the north that she had witnessed any act of leniency granted by the Holy See. A tentative sense of gratification filled her heart, knowing that despite the strict and unbending fealty demanded by the theocracy, the church was still capable of some measure of forbearance. Perhaps Coerthas, was not such an unforgiving place after all.

Roen let out a long sigh of relief. Blood of the dragonkin dripped from her sword as her chest rose and fell with the exertion of the battle. Ser Tournes had initially held her back from running after Khadai when he had made his move. The paladin could not help but pause and watch the Xaela warrior as he swung his sword with expert ease, and with a quickness that belied his size. He drove the aevis back, his blue-steeled sword crashing violently against the aevis’ strikes. Roen flinched once when she thought his head would be cracked open by a whip of the aevis’ tail, but it was narrowly dodged and batted away. Then the opening came and the rest of the knights rushed in. Idristan had released his hold on her shoulder as she too darted forward to help with the assault. From the corner of her eyes, the paladin could see the blue blur of the greatsword and its wielder as he leaped off the side of the rampart. Agile one, he. Roen made a silent note of the dexterity that was afforded to the tall warrior, likely the reason she found him in layers of leather armor rather than the thicker plate or chainmail that she preferred. “Good work, Deneith.” The temple knight approached her from behind, a smile creasing the Elezen’s usually sharp features. “Your diversion proved successful.” Roen glanced from the knight captain to the edge of the battlement where she had last saw the Xaela jump off. “It was Khadai’s idea, ser.” “Mm,” the Elezen pondered out loud, following her gaze into the night, although neither of them were close enough to to the edge to spot the Au Ra. “Impressive.” “Captain!” A familiar voice broke through their exchange as both of them turned to see Bellows running up from the other side. “Are you not suspicious that nearly a dozen aevis got within the walls without being detected?” A long stream of white breath was released through the Elezen knight’s nostrils. “What are you saying, Bellows?” “I’m just finding it mighty curious that all them dragonkin jus’ happened to sneak in on the same night that a certain foreigner was also ‘sleeping’ under the same roof.” Roen rolled her eyes. “Did you not just witness him charging in, nearly getting killed, while creating an opening for the rest of us?” The paladin was about to continue when Ser Tournes stepped in between them, the tall Elezen towering over the Midlander mercenary. “Enough.” It was his controlled tone that immediately quieted the Hyur. “This foreigner you have been accusing did take part in our offensive against the dragonkin, and as you and I plainly saw, risked his own life in doing so. I will not have you continue to accuse the man that I have already determined was free to go.” “But captain...!” Bellows began. “That will be all.” The paladin shook her head as she watched Bellows plod away; the Midlander was still clearly resentful. Only a few other soldiers paid him any mind, but most were busying themselves as they were beginning to clear the dead bodies away from the aetheryte. “You should get some rest, Deneith.” The Elezen knight gave her a scrutinizing look. “You look like you can use it.” He held up a hand before she could protest. “Your conjury is not needed this night. I believe most of the soldiers avoided grievous injuries. And yet even still, we have chirurgeons at hand. And you have another journey in the morn.” Roen nodded absently, for her aching limbs leaden with fatigue would not let her do anything else. As the adrenaline of the battle was wearing off, her lack of rest in the last two suns was becoming painfully obvious to her dulled senses. “Thank the Xaela on my behalf,” Ser Tournes said before turning away to organize the rest of the soldiers in their cleanup and repair. The paladin turned, wiping the blood off her sword and sheathing it. Her descent down the rampart was not as quickly paced as her climb. But even as her steps grew heavy, there was a certain sense of gratification that filled her lungs. Despite all the suspicions cast his way, Khadai had set his apprehensions aside and aided those who feared his foreign nature. Roen was surprised to find herself as relieved as she was at the thought. Perhaps she could not fault Edda for protecting the Au Ra so. Was he simply just someone who was lost, who needed a little bit of guidance to find his way? Roen spotted him standing in the middle of the courtyard, his massive sword still in hand. He seemed to be watching those that passed by him, his emerald eyes darting to and fro as if to take in the whole scene. Most were giving him a wide berth, especially with the dragon attack that had just ended, but a few wary glances were thrown in the Au Ra’s direction. “Well done,” the paladin said as she walked up to him. While she did not smile, there was a hint of appreciation in her voice. “You are quite effective with that sword.” Roen studied the odd blue-steel of the weapon in his hand briefly before she continued. “The knight captain extends his gratitude. I suspect that more suspicion would have been cast your way otherwise with this aevis attack. I am not certain how they even got in undetected.” She glanced over her shoulder towards the aetheryte and the milling of soldiers there. She frowned as she found herself scanning the crowd for Bellows. Should she tell Khadai that some were still holding onto their suspicions even after that display? Perhaps not here, and not now. Drawing a breath, she turned back to the Au Ra with a tired expression. “But that is neither here nor there. You should get inside, you are not dressed for the night’s chill. We can talk about… reconciliation in the morn.”

The paladin narrowed her eyes, scanning the battlement above. Ser Tournes was standing next to giant spear wielding dragonkillers on the eastern side of the aetheryte crystal, still shouting orders to the formation of knights surrounding the aevis. Her jaw set, she gave a quick nod to Khadai. “Follow me.” Roen ran up the ramp, breaths coming quick. Idristan scowled when he saw her approach, but she could see that he was looking not at her, but rather the massive Xaela behind her. “Captain,” she said breathlessly. “We need to break the aevis’ barricade. This is a standoff and as more time passes, the more damage they can do to the aetheryte, if that is their intent.” The Elezen’s sharp gaze returned back to her, his eyes narrowed. “They are using their size and the limited landing to their great advantage. What do you suggest, Deneith?” The paladin looked from the temple knight to the dragonkiller next to him. “We need a moment’s distraction. We only need one opening.” Ser Tournes arched a thin grey eyebrow. “We?” He glanced from her to the Au Ra once more, and this time she followed his gaze to the blue-steeled sword in the Xaela’s hands. “He is a warrior in his own right, and we need all help we can get.” Roen said before the temple knight could object about needing a foreigner’s aid. “His sword has greater reach, and if the aevis are as unfamiliar with his kind as most are, perhaps it would serve as an element of surprise. Even if it just buys us a fraction of an opportunity…” “Eugennoix!” Idristan drew the attention of the knight on the dragonkiller next to him. The knight answered with as stiff salute. “I trust your aim is one of the best.” “Aye, ser!” “Shoot one of the small spears down the rampart. Do not hit the aetheryte.” “But… captain..?!” “Can you do it, Eugennoix?” Ser Tournes held up a hand to cease all questions. “Aye or nay.” “Aye, ser!” came the nervous answer, and the knight shouted to those around him, who ran forth to begin turning the giant ballista about. Soon the metal gears were creaking and turning as the deadly points of the imposing spears were lowered to parallel the stony battlement. “All clear the way!” Idristan shouted into the biting wind. When the soldiers turned at his command, Roen could see their surprise in their sudden shift in stance. The phalanx quickly dispersed on the north side of the rampart to allow a path for the dragonkiller lance. The paladin could also see stirring within the encirclement of the aevis as they too spotted the massive weapon pointed their way. They shifted a little, as if they were anticipating a possible fire, although they were more daring than the soldiers--as if they doubted that such a thing would be fired upon so close to the aetheryte. They are frighteningly intelligent, Roen came to an alarming realization. They would recognize a ruse if this was one. But it was not. “Fire.” As the temple knight gave the command, the dragonkiller answered with a powerful blast, one that tossed Roen’s hair to the side even though she was standing a few fulms away from it. One of the smaller spears shot out from its barrel and flew like lightning through the air. But the trajectory was slightly slanted downward, and wisely so, sending the missile skittering across the ground halfway down its path. Its metallic edges sparked and screeched against the stones, sending a few aevis along that side lurching away on instinct. Soldiers too quickly leaped away on both sides of the aetheryte, even though they had already safely moved well out of its path. Eugennoix was true in his aim; the lance skidded along the narrow path between the edge of the parapet and the brass base of the aetheryte. This was the moment’s distraction that Khadai had asked for. Roen glanced to where the Xaela was, to already find him gone.

Some RP screenshots! “You got broody. Lost the idealistic streak. Kind of… I owe you a drink.” Roen looked back to Spahro with narrowed eyes. “A mistake of naivete and inexperience. It is nothing you did or did not do.” “I’ll agree to that, but I still owe you a drink. Old you, with stars in her eyes and red in her cheeks. I shouldn’t have been so eager to kill that. Wasn’t fair.” “…Do you believe in sacrifice?” “I believe sometimes such is necessary. Part at times must be sacrificed for the better of the whole. ‘Tis neither easy nor as noble as is depicted in tales.” “Nay. It is not easy.” A pause. “…Or noble.” “Not to the one whom offers up the sacrifice, no. Perhaps to those who remember it.” “Beneath the conflict of swords and wings, the blood of principle spills upon snow and mountains. The sea of mist shrouds a timeless testament, upon which the eternal march shall be impaled.“ His expression was blank, as if he too did not hold any awareness as to the words’ meaning. Roen gave him a sidelong glance. "Where do those words come from? Is that a prophecy?” “It is not. It is a….” Khadai paused, as if struggling to find the right word. “It is a wish, of sorts.”

The metallic bellow was unmistakable. The large bell was only ever rung for one thing. Dragons. Roen bolted up in her seat. She had fallen asleep at the tables near the kitchens, having finally succumbed to fatigue while trying to glean whatever information she could about the Au Ra from thick, ancient tomes. There were not many books in Camp Dragonhead, not like the Observatorium, and what little literature she did find had no information on this warrior-like race. She had thought to just ask Edda on it, but after discovering that the noblewoman had hidden certain facts from her, the paladin thought it best to do her own research. But the previous night spent in patrolling and searching for Blacke and Fenco, then followed by a full day’s journey on foot to Camp Dragonhead, even she could not deny the call of sleep. Once the question of Khadai and Edda’s freedom was put to rest, the weariness came crashing down upon her like a sudden tidal wave. Roen thought to only rest her head on the table for a moment, but it was not until bells later that she woke, the clangor of the alarm shattering her slumber. Adrenaline allowed her to ignore the stiffness of her limbs after having dozed off in her armor; the paladin rushed outside with little delay. Her eyes widened at the scene near the aetheryte, counting the numerous aevis surrounding the massive stone. While knights and soldiers flanked them on both sides of the battlement, they were unable to fully engage them in such a limited space. Roen was able to spot Ser Tournes, shouting orders from one of the nearby parapet, waving off the Berta that was being swung around toward the conflict. The moons that she had spent under the temple knight’s command still did not prepare her for these kinds of tactics. She was just hired on as a sellsword to provide an extra blade during a conflict. Where should she go? It was already crowded near the aetheryte. She spotted Bellows and Stray Oak up near the battlement stair, their weapons bared. She reached for her sword as she started forward in their general direction, when she spotted another figure in the snow. Khadai too had ran out into the courtyard, and he was halfway in between the inn and the aetheryte crystal. He was standing still, his hand on his weapon but not yet drawn. He also was still in that ill-fitting dalmatica and slacks, nowhere near armored for battle. But the Xaela did not even seem to notice, or even mind the cold, for he was watching the scene intently. Hesitation was clear in his grim expression. “Khadai!” Roen called out as she hurried to his side. “You do not have join in on this.” Her breaths were quick puffs of white steam in the night. “But you are a trained warrior. They… we could use your help.” The paladin glanced back towards the aetheryte. “The aevis seems to be targeting the crystal, and I have never heard of them doing that before.” She paused, scanning quickly through the rampart. “But I am not certain how to approach this. There is limited space and the creatures know how to use it to their advantage.” She flicked a glance back at the massive Au Ra. “Any ideas?”

Last meal for Roen: Baked warmwater trout in a garlic butter sauce, an assortment of nopales dumplings, and chanterelle saute. A glass of sweet water. It also has to be prepared by Gideon North.

Roen ascended the stairs of the inn once more, the greatsword heavy in her grasp. “I will leave the responsibility of his fate in your hands, Deneith. He passed the test, I will not hold him.” Idristan Tournes reaction to Khadai’s “arrest” had been as the paladin predicted; she had come to know the knight captain as strict but fair in judgement. But Bellows voiced his dissatisfaction loudly, still arguing against the deaths of the two mercenaries. He also questioned Roen’s judgement in that she was showing bias because she favored the noblewoman, and inquiring about the paladin’s own past that she had yet to speak of. He seemed to be intent on turning the interrogation onto her when the temple knight finally stopped him with a raise of his hand and a stern look. The knight dismissed Bellows and Stray Oak--the latter who had stayed silent the entire time--and turned to the paladin with a warning that he did not share with the others. He confided in her that it would be best if she would escort the Au Ra to Ishgard, and in doing so discern the foreigner’s motives and nature. Additionally, it would distance her somewhat from Bellows and squelch the unrest that the mercenary’s suspicious nature was inciting among some of the new recruits. Roen did not know what to think about accompanying Edda and Khadai to Ishgard. A part of her was at least comforted in knowing that she could make certain of the noblewoman’s safety; she did not trust her care to the Xaela. The paladin did not think the Au Ra had ill intentions, but he seemed to be a magnet for trouble. And he would be even more so in Ishgard, a city full of people who looked upon all outsiders with distrust. She did not want Edda caught up in that mess. The paladin knocked softly upon the door to the noblewoman’s room. It had been bells since she had left the two earlier, and night had fallen long ago. There was no answer. Even a quiet call produced no response. Her mind set to purpose, Roen knocked on Khadai’s door. "Enter." Upon opening the portal, Roen found the Xaela not in the chair or upon the bed, but sitting on the floor with his back against the wall. He was dressed in plain, borrowed clothing from his appearance; slight tears around the neck of his tunic were visible where it seemed some difficulty was had with his horns. The clothing was clearly ill-fitting, though he looked to be of an Elezen's proportions, the tailoring was not as adaptable. The Xaela’s emerald gaze stared straight ahead at the wall opposite him even when she crossed the room in front of him. "You are free to go in the morn,” the paladin said quietly as she laid his greatsword onto his bed. "Yet you possess inquiries." Roen straightened, remaining at the edge of the bed as she studied the seated figure. The Au Ra was perceptive, that was never a doubt. "I have many inquiries. You have been frank so far, as far as I can gather, and have been willing to answer truthfully." She paused as if to mull over her questions. "Why are you here?" "To find information that will assist me in performing my function." The answer is almost immediate, and with very little hesitation. The Xaela still refused to look at her, keeping his gaze fixed on the wall. "I need more information than that.” The paladin took the opportunity to study him, for she had never seen an Au Ra before this past sun. Khadai had retied his hair back into the ponytail from before, jet black locks fringed with deepwood green. His ebony horns were capped with metal ornaments on the front ends, and in the light, small detailed patterns of facepaint were visible around his eyes and cheekbones. His expression was as severe as ever. “And why do you need Edda?" she added, her eyes narrowed. There was a pause. "I became lost." Roen quirked a brow. "That is it. You became lost.” It was a straightforward answer, and yet almost too simple. She was not sure she believed it. “Edda said she tried to initially run away from you. Why did she say that?" "I was attacked by masked warriors. I presume she found the aftermath, and drew her conclusions from there." His expression remained stoic, his tone neutral. There was no obvious guile in his voice. "Did they meet the same fate as the two I was looking for?" Roen knew there was a darkening of her expression as the paladin too began to draw her own conclusions. The Xaela sighed, as if he expected what was coming next. "The circumstances differed. They did not voice their intentions first. They merely attacked with intent to kill, and forfeited the possibility of discourse." "This was... in the Shroud?" He paused again. "The tall forest," he said, more to himself. Roen frowned. She had been to Gridania a few times, and the Wood Wailers’ compassionless attitude towards foreigners ("poachers") in their land were even at times harsher than in Ishgard. Masked bandits were also plentiful in the Shroud. And yet this was still more evidence of the violence that followed in the Xaela’s wake. And Edda had purposefully said nothing of it. Whether this was his fault or not, it should have been disclosed at least to her. There was a stirring of misgivings in her mind, ones that she had just dismissed mere bells ago. But he did tell me the truth when asked... when he did not have to, the paladin reminded herself. While Edda chose to conceal it, Khadai answered honestly. Despite his abrasive nature, the Xaela did not seem prone to deception. It allowed the paladin to set her suspicions aside for now. "You were intending to come here. To Coerthas. Why?" Khadai’s expression twisted into a perplexed frown. "I am… meant to travel here." "For what purpose?" The Au Ra pursed his lips in thought then pointed to the wall across from him where his gaze had been fixed. "I have carved patterns into the stone. Do you see colour?" When Roen turned to the opposite wall, her eyes widened to see faint but elaborate patterns on the stone wall that she had not recognized before. Whorls and curves were etched into it, all made with lines seemingly unbroken. When she focused on one section of the pattern, the adjacent section appeared to change to the eye. Some lines would become straighter while others would curl into semicircles, or bend. The shift only happened at peripheral vision, and when one focused on the source of the change, it reverted to its initial state. The optical illusion covered nearly the entirety of a single brick's surface. "What... is this?" Roen bent closer to the large stone, her eyes squinted. "Do you see colours within the pattern?" Her eyes roamed about the diagram once more, this time with care. The etchings were devoid of hues or shades; only the light marring upon the gray stone was visible. "Nay. Just lines. Or circles. Patterns. But... no colors." "That is why,” Khadai rumbled. "The information I seek is… related. For I see the faint colours, yet they are different. Foreign from what I know. I must discern why.” He drew a breath, and when he continued, his voice was monotonous and his intonations mechanical. It was as if he was reciting a prayer in a foreign language. “Beneath the conflict of swords and wings, the blood of principle spills upon snow and mountains. The sea of mist shrouds a timeless testament, upon which the eternal march shall be impaled." His expression was blank, as if he too did not hold any awareness as to the words’ meaning. Roe gave him a sidelong glance. "Where do those words come from? Is that a prophecy?" "It is not. It is a...." he paused, as if struggling to find the right word. "It is a wish, of sorts." He shook his head. "I am not equipped to explain it to you." Roen turned back to the Au Ra, crossing her arms. "And you need Edda for this?" "Not her specifically… at least, I do not have reason to believe so. She acts as my guide within this land as I seek my objective. And in return, I am to fight for her when she calls upon me." "She picked a capable fighter then," she noted mostly to herself. "Edda means to see you to Ishgard, that much is certain. I have agreed to accompany you both to the city, and I have no doubt you will need further guidance within that city." She paused, regarding him intently. "But will you consider your contract complete in terms of her agreement to you once you are there? She is not the best guide you could have chosen." "The terms of our agreement ended when we breached the snowline. She is obliged to me no longer. That is… the terms of her agreement with me." The paladin blinked. "I... see. Therefore she continues in your company because she feels that you need her. And she has already assumed responsibility for your actions." Khadai stared past her, back onto the barely visible pattern. "I do not know the appropriate course of action for this circumstance." "I wish to see you leave her company," Roen stated bluntly without emotion. "She has taken on a responsibility that should have never been hers, one she is poorly equipped to handle should there be any complications." She paused, her voice quieting. "She is my friend. I do not wish to see her in trouble. Especially when undeserved.” It was then that the Au Ra finally looked to her for the first time in their conversation. His face was one of utter confusion. "She is no longer obliged to me," he said awkwardly. "I do not understand why you have opened discourse with me about this." Roen stepped closer to him, as if that would press her point. "Not by contract. But she feels some obligation to you. And in honoring that, whether it is truly binding or not, she has put herself into a situation that is not suitable for her." The paladin was careful to keep her tone neutral. "I am not faulting you for this. But I am asking you to part from her company. By refusing her generosity." There was just a slight widening of his eyes, as if a realization had dawned on him. "I understand," he murmured. "From the beginning she has stepped outside of her capacity by serving as a guide. Therefore it would be inefficient to utilize her abilities for that which she is not meant for." He seemed to be agreeing with her. "What would be the optimal course of action? Is there another within a role that may provide me assistance?" The paladin narrowed her eyes. That was not quite her sentiment, but in a literal sense she supposed it was. "You need to find another guide. One more suitable. Perhaps we can find you one in Ishgard." She paused and bowed her gaze. "Although… that may be difficult in and of itself. By the very nature of your appearance, I fear your will incite much suspicion from those within that city. You are in a land where people have fought dragonkind for over thousand years. Where people have shut their gates to all outsiders. I cannot see them welcoming someone like you with open arms." Khadai frowned. "....Do they possess doors for arms?" Roen cocked another brow. That question sounded earnest. She studied him for a moment, as if to expect another sarcastic retort. When none came, she sighed. “No. They are... just arms." She paused, electing to believe that it was his comprehension in figure of speech that was lacking. His grasp of their language was otherwise adequate, if not surprisingly competent. "It is just a turn of expression. They will not be very hospitable." "I understand,” the Au Ra rumbled. Silence fell over the conversation for a time before he spoke again. "You act within a military capacity. So, too, do I. Is there no possibility of reconciliation between these roles? You and I possess similar responsibilities. Are you not fit to clarify misconceptions of the western continent?" The paladin narrowed her eyes, trying to follow his logic. “I suppose I am.” "Then I propose a transaction of services." His tone was awkward, but he trained his eyes intently upon hers. "I request information of the western continent. In return, I offer my body and abilities." Both the paladin’s brows shot upwards towards the ceiling. "Your..." There was a long pause as she stared at him with her lips pressed tightly together. "Is that the offer you made to Edda?" His expression was puzzled. "Is it not adequate?" She licked her lips, searching for the right words. "You do mean, your body as in... your capacity as a warrior." She cleared her throat. That did not quite sound right either. "What I mean is, your fighting prowess,” she added hastily. Khadai then stood, as if to display himself. Roen stared at him again incredulously, for that gesture did not help. "Yes." He seemed confused and studied her face. "Are you cold?" It was more of a statement than a question. She immediately made a face even without thinking. She could already feel the burning in her cheeks. "Your..." She cleared her throat again. "You may want to work on that... proposed transaction. That is... if you are going to continue to offer your... services... here. In the Western continent." She let out a long suffering sigh. "It could entirely mean something else." "What is this other interpretation? I wish to know." The paladin grimaced. She opened her mouth then closed it a few times before deciding on what to say. But it still came out in a nervous stammer. "Well. To uh... offer ‘your body’... in our ... in this land... this place... it ah... you could be offering services akin to prostitution." She scratched her head, she had never been at ease with this subject. "I do not understand this word. What is the definition?" Xaela still seemed clueless. "I wish to obtain this information to understand the avoidance of this interpretation." Roen hung her head, her hands falling to her sides. Of course he does not know what that means, she chided herself. She forced her voice to calm as she peered up at Khadai, willing for him to understand her this time around. "Prostitution is when you offer… sex. For money. Or services." She rolled her eyes away away at him. It was more out of annoyance at herself than the Au Ra. "Understand?" He still wore somewhat of a bewildered look, but he nodded. "I understand." Determined not to be flustered, the paladin squared her shoulders and forced her gaze back onto the Xaela. She was feeling rather silly. "So unless that is what you are proposing in the transaction, I suggest you choose another word." Khadai frowned. "I have erred. Edda may be unaware of this interpretation. If my offer was inadequate, then I must needs clarify the transaction for her. If this transaction is to be performed equitably, the availability of this second offer must be made known to her." Roen quickly shook her head. "I am fairly certain that she chose to interpret it as you offering your services as a warrior. At least that is what she has told me in what she has agreed to. I do not think you need to--" The Xaela continued, despite her protests. His expression was intent. "Referring to our own transaction of services. If the first interpretation is found lacking, then I offer the second interpretation in addition." He nodded once as if to himself, seemingly satisfied with the proposal made. Khadai was met with a long, silent stare. Her lips moved as if trying to form the words, but it was awhile before she actually made any sound. "No," she said hoarsely. "I am certain that is not... not necessary. No." He was staring at her. "Is the first interpretation sufficient?" "Yes!" she blurted out. "I mean… no! That is..." She released a sharp breath through her nostrils. "I am certain we can get you a guide that is more willing." The Xaela was squinting at her, as though he could not fathom whatever words she had left unspoken. Roen took a deep breath to collect her thoughts. "I am not even certain why you are here. And now I believe even you are not sure of your purpose." "I am not, though I wish to be," he said austerely. "One who is merely a guide may not be sufficient. Our overlapping of responsibilities may offer each of us experience with which we can reach further reconciliation." His emerald gaze met hers. "Is my offer inadequate?" The paladin sighed. She wanted to object. Continuing in their company beyond Ishgard was not something she had even remotely considered. She had not come to Ishgard to aid a foreigner in some enigmatic journey. And yet… did she truly know what her own purpose was in this frigid place? "Let me think on it,” she said quietly, her gaze growing distant. Khadai nodded. "I shall heed your words, and refuse Edda's generosity. Though she steps outside of her role, she must travel with me until my debt is repaid and our transaction completed in full. Our transaction is not done until I am called upon to fight for her." Roen frowned. Why did Edda need such a favor? From a foreigner no less? She dismissed her apprehensions with a shake of her head. "There are ways in our lands where she can contact you from afar." "If that is true, then that is adequate. So long as I remain capable of being called upon." There was a wry curl to her lips. "I will show you one such way, soon enough." There was just a smallest part of her that drew some amusement from imagining how he would react to a moogle. When the Au Ra merely nodded in answer, she turned toward the door. There was a thought that then crossed her mind, one that she had set aside earlier. "She will likely be angry with me, that I asked you to leave her company," the paladin said quietly without looking at the Xaela. It brought another fleeting reminder of Mister North, he who would tell her that others deciding people’s fate for them was not something he appreciated. And that Roen should be above such pretension. "That is between you and her," the Xaela said matter-of-factly. “Aye,” the paladin acknowledged with a tinge of regret as she opened the door. "Be ready to leave in the morn."

Gazes longingly at a huge list of contacts and potential scenarios drafted up in onenote over the last year an more m-m-maybe tomorrow... -is silently jealous of the drafts of potential scenarios- Oh and one more confession: 5) Sometimes I am waaaaay too self-conscious about leaving rumors on people's wikis. I love DOING it, but I want them to be insightful! Significant! ....Then too many times what I end up leaving does not measure up anywhere near what I had hoped to think up for them.

1) When arranging for RP with a player I am not familiar with, I comb through the forums and wiki to see not only what their character is like but also to get an idea of what the player might be like. 2) I generally can't say "no" when people I don't know ask me to RP with them. But that often leave me in the quandry of trying to think up an interesting scene/hook/twist/something/anything for that random encounter. It often delays the actual meeting, some don't even end up happening for whatever reason and I feel bad about it. I should sometimes just tell myself "oh just let it happen, it doesn't have to lead to anything." But as others have mentioned in another RP thread, context is so SO important to me. 3) I have a list of people I want to RP with that I haven't gotten the chance to yet. The list comes from browsing through the RPC where there are players/characters I really want to encounter somehow, and yet I can't think of a proper context in my character's current timeline/story to do so! So... I don't. But I read their IC/OOC posts on the RPC and go "-sigh- someday!" 4) I am horrible about spontaneous open world RP. I used to just walk around Ul'dah in my early days, or read a book in the Quicksand and open myself up to random encounters. Now... everything is scheduled ahead of time. I kind of miss those days, but I also recognize that my character's story is at a point where she doesn't just hang out at a bar. And my online playtime has to be balanced between RP and PvE so, prearranging RP seems to work the best for me.

I was reminded the other day (by Sounsyy's shameless plug no less) that I had written this up loooooong time ago for this prompt but never actually posted it! I thought about what would be the earliest defining moment in Roen's history, and it would have to be her Garlean mother dying when she was young. So what if her father never became involved in a project that took him away from home and her mother was never recruited by the Ala Mhigans and lived? Roen would have had a nurturing mother throughout her formative years, she likely would have felt no need to rescue anyone and thereby never taking up the sword and shield. She would have been a lot less tomboyish and would have never tried to sneak into the Battle of Carteneau to impress her negligent father. Would she have never come to Eorzea...? Well...

“Mayhaps for you,” Bellows pushed himself off the wall he was leaning on. Roen flicked the Midlander a glance as he strolled near the bed, snatching up a towel and tossing it to the Au Ra who had risen up out of the bath tub. The paladin only kept the nude figure in the periphery of her vision, since he was not the greatest threat in the room at the moment. Rather, it was the mercenary she had brought with her. “Quit flustering the ladies, eh?” The Hyur’s banter held no mirth, nor did his crooked grin. He snatched up a towel and tossed it at Khadai backhand, in an almost derisive way. He strolled to the side of the bed and picked up the Xaela’s greatsword by its long hilt. Roen turned fully to face the mercenary and tilted her head with a warning. “What are you doing?” Bellows tried to heave the massive sword over his shoulder, but settled for sticking the tip into the ground instead. "Captain said he was to be held for questioning.” He gave Roen a sidelong glance with a nonchalant shrug. But there was more behind his narrowed eyes. “We should make sure the captain don't have questions of his own, eh?" The paladin quickly glanced to Khadai. This was an attempt to provoke him, that much was clear. The Au Ra remained eerily quiet and made no moves towards the mercenary. But he gave Bellows a hard stare, and while Roen did not see any obvious animosity on his expression, it was obvious that the Xaela was intently watching the Hyur. "Edda. I require clarification to this situation.” He finally broke his silence. “What is the appropriate course of action?" The noblewoman brushed past the paladin and stepped into the room, glaring at Bellows as well. “Just what is the meaning of this? Put his sword down this instant.” She brought one hand down from the cusp of her towel and held it out to her side with a flourish. "You would be wise to heed Roen's decision, and give your superior your report. If he has any cause for concern, or any further questions, then he can come here himself!" "Tsk, tsk." Bellows shook his head, his finger tapping on the hilt of the sword. "Your highness," he addressed her, his words dripping with sarcasm. "Your noble attitude won't get you any where with me. I know your type. Bossy, used to getting what you want. You're not in your mansion and we ain't your servants. This man is under suspicion for murder, and until the captain says so, I can't have him detained in here with deadly weapons." The mercenary leaned in and spoke the last two words slowly as if speaking to a child. "Enough, Bellows," Roen said sharply. "I will make my report, the captain will make his decision." She gave Khadai one more glance before turning back to Edda. "It is but temporary. It will be returned to him once the decision is made." The Midlander let out a loud snort. "Yer assumin' a lot, Deneith." He wasn't looking at her though, he was squarely meeting the Au Ra’s gaze. His tone was daring. "What if he orders the Xaela’s execution in the morn, eh? Mayhaps I use this sword to do it." It was then that Edda quickly closed the distance between herself and the mercenary and struck the man clean across the face. Without even waiting for his response, she turned her back to him and looked to Roen with a stern look. "You would do well to tell your captain to take care in who he hires. You may keep the sword for now. I will come to retrieve it at first light, tomorrow. It will be returned to me." "The princess has got a bite!" Bellows winced and rubbed his cheek. The paladin ignored him. "Leave this room, now." Roen glared icily at the Hyur to which he snorted but complied. Oak soon followed, the look on the Roegadyn’s face uncertain. The paladin kept her silence as she watched the Midlander leave with the Hellsguard, their armored footsteps growing more distant down the hallway. She let out a quiet sigh of relief that the matter did not escalate despite Bellow’s efforts. And yet, a part of her still could not blame the man. For all he knew, this towering Au Ra cared nothing for the lives he took, even if he had the justification of self defense. Killing soldiers under the jurisdiction of the Holy See, no matter how loose the affiliation, never boded well for anyone. Roen wondered how much of this Edda truly understood. She knew the noblewoman was learned in many things, and yet with her flash of indignation in Khadai’s defense, Roen believed Edda’s perspective in this could be slightly biased. Roen glanced to the woman and found Edda’s gaze keen with determination. The paladin wondered why the noblewoman defended the Au Ra so fervidly. Did she care so much for all who were in her association? A sidelong glance was then afford to the Xaela. Khadai still stood unmoving, not caring for the moisture running in rivulets down his body. He held an odd expression as he continued to stare out towards the hallway. It was still an austere countenance, but now somewhat unreadable. Gone was the impatience and contempt that always seemed to etch his dark, scaled visage, and in its place was a perplexed foreigner. The paladin turned back to Edda with a tired sigh. “He was trying to provoke him.” She turned her head towards to Khadai without really looking at his form. “It was fortunate that you did not take the bait.” The Xaela jerked his head towards her, his glance one of disapproval. “I do not understand,” he rumbled. But that was all he said before he picked up the towel that was thrown at him to dry himself. "They fear your actions, and so they seek to neuter you by stripping you of your weapon," Edda stated simply. All of her earlier vexation had faded, and now Roen just felt weary. "Had there been an incident, had you shown yet another proclivity to react with sudden violence, consequences would have been much more dire." The paladin glanced up at Khadai, careful to keep her gaze strictly above his jawline. "But I think you proved my case rather than his." Khadai frowned, his confusion evident. "I am treated as if I am a weather pattern, or a storm," he murmured as an idle observation. "I do not understand," he repeated to nobody in particular.

The ceremonial chords of the organs pulsated through the Saint Reymanaud Cathedral, echoing off the vaulted ceilings and permeating through every beam and stone. It was as if they wanted to herald to the world the august might of the Goddess of War, whose statue stood erect upon the altar with her spear and bronze greatshield at her sides. The shafts of colored daylight filtered in through the stained glass windows above her and crowned her head with an unworldly halo of brilliance. The vision of Halone was meant to inspire awe and wonder to all her supplicants who looked upon her. But rather than a paragon of strength, Roen only saw a lone, armored woman standing in solitude. Her stance was dignified, her shoulders squared with purpose... but the figure seemed cold and empty. She wondered if the woman within had ever been plagued with doubts. Did she ever falter under the weight of the knowledge that people of Ishgard all looked to her for deliverance? Or did that not matter to the Goddess of War, who only sought to unleash wrath upon all her enemies? Roen often found her steps leading her here, to this place of worship, whenever her thoughts and wanderings became aimless. She did not like such idle times, especially within the city, but on too many occasions she was left to her own devices in between nightly patrols. Perhaps it was the music, or the austere architecture, but her seat at the back of the Cathedral became her refuge where she could come to drown her thoughts. Sorrow had become an unwanted, ghostly companion, and Roen had become desperate to part from it. All of Ishgard seemed to implore the Mover of Glaciers for guidance, so why couldn’t she receive a similar epiphany? And yet, sun after sun, no such revelations came. Until one ordinary afternoon, when an Elezen supplicant joined her, taking a seat on the pews next to her. His armor, appearance, and mannerisms all spoke of an Ishgardian knight. But curiously enough, the Elezen was a Duskwight. The paladin peripherally knew of House of Dzemael, but had not come into much contact with Duskwights in Ishgard, much less one of knightly rank. "Is aught amiss?" he had asked. Roen was not sure why she did not dismiss his inquiry to her welfare. Perhaps a small part of her hoped to glean some answers of faith from a reverent knight rather than the silent idol. "Are you devout?" she asked bluntly. "While I would not call myself a priest, I have much faith, yes." He spoke softly but clearly; his regard of her was one of genteel courtesy. "I came here seeking answers. I am finding none." Roen returned none of the cordiality as they spoke. “Mayhaps then I can be of some aid.” He smiled amiably. “When I find myself here, 'tis oft to clear my thoughts. Providing such aid to another is but the least I can do." "Your Goddess of War." The paladin did not hold his gaze for long, her eyes going back to the statue. "She holds a great shield, and yet it is her spear that represents her. Is it wrath that drives her? Or the determination to protect her people behind that shield?" The Elezen pondered a moment. “While ‘tis true many see Halone's spear and look only to her wrath, some, including myself do not forget her shield. I am of the mind of the latter." His sentiments… they were so similar to her own not so long ago. His pride in defending his people was obvious in his expression. It only made her frown. "If one does not take up the spear, if one does not destroy one's enemies, does that not only prolong the suffering of those you protect?" "Such is true.” He did not seem to notice her darkened mood. “And yet the tale of loss is a common one amongst our people. I know not a single soul who has not been touched by it due to the war. One can wish to see peace without longing for war, can they not?" “Some would say such wishes are made of fantasies and dreams. For those who seek to take up the shield, they should warn those shield bearers, they also need to kill. I have wondered if Halone shares such teachings to those of her faith." Roen paid no mind as the knight turned to studied her, a curious look in his eyes. "One has need of both. To shield alone would invite a slow death, so one must needs strike with sword as well. I left behind the spear to take up shield some years past and I cannot say I regret such, despite my thoughts at the time." That made her turn to peer up at him. "Why did you? Take up the shield rather than the spear? Did you find what you were looking for?" "T'was not to search for anything that I did so.” He answered with a distant look. “Not at first. It was more disgust at those who sought to use their power to oppress others." He did not seem to take notice when Roen stiffened. "Taking up the shield was, to some, a dishonor. Father, brother, sister… each walked the path of the dragoon. And I would choose to do otherwise? Such was laughable. Dragoons are the elite. The highest and most holy defenders of our nation. A symbol of our strength." He then turned to her, offering her a small smile. "And yet, if the spear Halone holds is a holy instrument, why should the shield be any less such?" The paladin narrowed her eyes. "Many hold the idealism of protecting others and seeking peace without violent means as a virtue to be held above the rest." She sighed and fell back into her seat. "I have found such beliefs to be hollow." "Violence, at times, is unavoidable,” the knight said quietly. "Violence upon good people at times... is unavoidable." Roen echoed as she stared straight ahead. "Perhaps. This is not a world free from such. Beasts, men, all manner of creature exist… some of which only understand the language of violence." She was starting to find some comfort in his words. Was it his faith in Halone that lent him such composure? "...Do you believe in sacrifice?" The Elezen drew a long, slow breath. "I believe sometimes such is necessary. Part at times must be sacrificed for the better of the whole. 'Tis neither easy nor as noble as is depicted in tales." Roen bowed her head, her forelocks falling before her eyes. His words were not missing their marks, whether he had intended to or not. Suddenly what brief reprieve she had found in his wisdom had turned to remorse. "Nay, it is not easy." Her own voice emerged as a hoarse whisper. "Or noble." His voice had quieted as well. "Not to the one who offers up the sacrifice, no. Perhaps to those who remember it." She fought the warmth that threatened to blur her vision. A part of her was angry that she could be so easily stirred. Her hands clenched into fists as she remained silent for a long time, and the Elezen remained as he was, unobtrusively patient. The paladin swiped at her cheeks and inhaled deeply. "Perhaps I should have sought the teachings of Halone sooner. If such wisdom is imparted upon her followers." The knight offered a rather hollow sounding chuckle. "Mayhaps, though I would venture to say your questions may have found a different answer should you have asked others." Roen no longer turned to face him. "I have infringed on your time long enough, good ser. Gratitude for your time and answers.” He quirked a brow at her. "I trust your curiosity to be sated then?" The paladin shook her head as she stood. “Nay, but you reminded me that the world is full of losses. For me to dwell on mine own does nothing." The Duskwight rose when she did. “I am glad to have been of some assistance. Mayhaps should our paths cross again, you will have found some of which you seek." Roen allowed herself to peer up at him, unable to shed her lingering sense of sadness. "I hope you can remain a shield bearer. One without regrets." He looked upon her questioningly but eventually nodded. "Life oft has them, fellow shield bearer. We can only hope to carry the right ones in the end." The paladin shook her head quickly. "I am a poor shield bearer. I should have taken up the spear. The greatsword. The axe. Anything but the damnable shield." Her words were turning bitter. The knight canted his head, his voice remaining soft. "And why, praytell would that be?" Roen glanced to the exit. She no longer wanted to be here, speaking with this stranger about all the misery in her heart. "That is not a tale anyone should wish to hear. Nor one I wish to share." She bowed curtly. "My apologies, that I cannot offer you the same courtesy in suitable answers." The Elezen exhaled and waved a hand. "No apology is needed. 'Tis not my intent to pry, m'lady. Such… is perhaps still an open wound. Of this I understand well. It needs time to heal." There was a small pause before he continued. “Mayhaps 'tis forward to say as such, but there is little harm in one who bears the shield allowing some measure of selfishness." The paladin instantly glared at him. "But what cost? My past selfishness allowed for things that should have never happened." The knight folded his arms. "Tis one to measure is it not? We oft give of ourselves, every onze of our essence to protect others. If one does not allow time for yourself… you will simply give until you are spent. And should such a thing happen? Your shield will be of little use to anyone, especially oneself." Roen shook her head. "Ser... I have much to atone for." Her gaze lowered, and she knew not why her next confession left her lips before this stranger. “Perhaps it was not answers I sought here." Her voice was barely above a whisper. "Perhaps I sought forgiveness.” "Another gifting such a thing to you would do little if you have not accepted it for yourself, my friend." "Well then, it is futile for me to seek it here." She forced another frown to chase away all else. She bowed sharply at the waist before turning. "Gratitude, once again." Her armored footsteps echoed over the stone floor as she made her hurried exit, the music of the cathedral's organs now distant and muted to her ears.

“When I said ‘show ‘em yer hospitality, Oak, becomin’ the woman’s manservant was not what I had in mind!” Roen ignored the chatter behind her, as Bellows continued to chide Oak. They had found the Roegadyn in the stables, tending to Edda’s chocobo. The Hellsguard apparently did not know how to refuse the noblewoman’s commanding instructions and assisted her in obtaining a room and stabling her bird. While Bellows threw his hands into the air in exasperation, Roen could not help but be slightly amused. But the diversion was a fleeting one as they ascended the stairs leading to both Edda and Khadai’s rooms. The innkeeper had been cooperative in pointing out which ones they had paid for. “What else was I ta do? She was very… insistent,” the Hellsguard said glumly. “Let me take the lead on this, Bellows.” Roen gave the Midlander next to her a stern look. He had insisted on accompanying her on this task, and Ser Tournes had allowed it. The Hyur’s mistrustful nature was clear to her from the first day she had met him; even though he recognized the Au Ra for what he was, it was obvious he still regarded the Xaela with apprehension. The paladin half wondered if there was anyone Bellow did not consider suspicious other than Oak. “By all means, be my guest.” Bellows gestured with a sweep of his hand. “But I’m not here to watch ya have him cheat the test.” Roen paused at the top of the stairs. “Cheat?” “Yeah. Warn him ahead of time that this is a test. He’s s’posed to give himself up right?” “I understood the orders,” Roen said sharply. “But I will not see you provoke anyone needlessly either.” Bellows only smirked. “After you.” Roen paused at the door at the end of the hallway, looking to the spare keys she was given. She could just barge in, but likely approaching the Xaela with civility and reason was more likely to have a favorable outcome. There was a twinge of dread at the possibility that he would not react well, and blades would be drawn on all sides. The paladin pushed that thought aside, telling herself that Edda did not believe him to be a cold-hearted killer, and so Roen rejected the idea as well. But there was a small part of her that steeled herself for a possible violent outcome. She rapped on the door. There was first silence that followed, then oddly, she was answered with the knock from within. Roen looked quizzically at the door, for nothing else emerged. “Knocking?” Bellows snorted. “Let us warn the Au Ra, eh? Best to get him before her reaches for his weapons.” The paladin shot the Hyur a sharp glare. “But is that not the point?” She turned back to the door, and when still no voice answered, she cleared her throat. “Khadai? Are you within?” A moment later the door swung open without warning, and it was to Roen’s dismay that she found Khadai standing across the threshold from her, completely unclothed. She barely heard him say, “What is it?” in a rough tone as the paladin quickly averted her eyes. “Ah.” She was staring at anything else except for the naked man in front of her and spied a wooden tub within the room. “Apologies for the intrusion…” she blurted out. She ignored a low whistle from the Roegadyn behind her. “Well! I can’t say I’ve seen that!” Bellows snickered. Khadai just stood at the doorway and repeated his earlier question, this time annoyance lending an edge to his voice. “What is it?” It was then that the adjacent door also swung open and Edda emerged; the noblewoman was also mostly unclothed and wet, with a towel wrapped around her torso just below her clavicles. “Just what is going onnNN!” What had begun in a commanding tone quickly became a high pitched squeak, as she too averted her eyes from the Xaela, affixing her gaze pointedly at Bellows. The Midlander bursted out into a fit of laughter, as he found comedy in all this that still escaped the paladin. “We have perfect timing or what?” He laughed even harder when Oak let out a longer whistle. Roen rubbed her forehead and let calm return to her countenance. This was not the time to be flustered by some unexpected nudity of all things. She forced her eyes up at the towering Xaela and cleared her throat. “I have made my report to the knight captain. You are to be arrested and held for questioning for the death of the two mercenaries that you encountered.” Khadai regarded her for a moment, scratching his head. There were questions that passed before his eyes and his face curled in confusion. "Ask your questions," he said tersely, swinging the door open even wider before turning his back to them and returning to the wooden tub within. Roen watched dumbfounded as he took up a jug of steaming water and proceeded to pour it into the giant basin. It was at least a breath before Roen composed her next thought. “Can you at least put some clothes on?” she asked, a bit irked. “I am unable to bathe effectively while wearing clothes,” the Xaela said matter-of-factly as he continue to remove two steel ornaments that capped the ends of his horizontal horns, setting them aside. “You have questions. Ask.” “Wh-what do you mean, arrested?” Edda interrupted, and when Roen turned her attention (thankfully) to the noblewoman, she could see that the woman’s cheeks were ten shades deeper than Dalamud. “C-c-can this not wait?” It was Bellows that answered her first with a shake of his head. “I’m afraid not, m’lady.” He spoke the title without any deference. “Orders are orders. We don’t let potential murderers soak and sleep before we question them.” Roen could see Edda composing herself quickly enough, giving Bellows an utterly withering look. “I was not speaking to you.” When she met the paladin’s gaze, it was with a frown. “S-surely there must be some sort of… error. He has done nothing.” Roen exhaled with a look of an apology. Certainly Edda could not have expected for the paladin to lead them to Dragonhead only to then arrange for her companion’s arrest. That had never been her intent, but it certainly could be seen that way. But even still, the Xaela was not completely innocent. “This is just for questioning,” she answered the noblewoman calmly. “The knight captain needs to be sure that it was all in self defense.” The paladin was growing tired of this test. This deception. Khadai seemed willing enough to answer her questions and so far had not shown any signs that he would resort to any combat. “So you are yielding yourself? You will answer the questions posed? You will not resist being detained?” She repeated, this time for Bellows’ sake. If she could clearly illustrate the Xaela’s willingness to cooperate, this farce would be over. Khadai let out an exasperated sigh and turned from the tub to face them again, folding his arms across his chest. "I have not, nor do I, intend to reach for my weapon. I am currently confined to one location, that location being this room. You have questions. I will answer. Do not waste either of our time. Ask." His impatience was growing, this much Roen could already tell. Were all the Au Ra so easily irritable? “You heard the man,” Bellows pushed past her into the room, coming to lean against the wall next to the Xaela’s massive greatsword. The Midlander was not yet willing to let this charade end. Oak shifted in his stance behind her, staying silent. The Hyur had brought him along as well for backup in case reinforcement was necessary to subdue the massive Au Ra. Roen was determined not to let it escalate to that point. She strode into the room and came to stand a few yalms away from the Xaela who had resumed the task of filling his tub. Ser Tournes likely would have questions for this Au Ra, as would any other that would come across a stranger who had killed two men. Even while she believed in the story that was given, Roen had the advantage of knowing Edda to lend some point of perspective. But no one else here knew either of them. The paladin now had to convince her knight captain and the mercenaries that this Xaela was not dangerous. It was then that she realized there was still a small part of her conscience that also needed the same reassurance. Roen narrowed her eyes and resolve settled about her frame as she regarded the Au Ra. “You suffered no wounds from your encounter with Blacke and Fenco, the two mercenaries you killed. How did you know all other discourse had failed?”

Roen too has a fat kitten, sent to her as a gift by Kage. She is allergic to cats, sneezing or sniffling whenever they are nearby, but she did not have the heart to give the kitten away. But she also has not given it a name and she leaves it in the care of the innkeeper at the Forgotten Knight most of the time since she is currently on patrol duty in Coerthas. But whenever she does return to Ishgard and her lodging at the inn, the kitten greets her with purrs and nudging of her hand and Roen does not turn it away. It is likely one of few things she allows herself to return any kind of affection lately considering her glum disposition.

Welcome to the RPC! Aaah had you been here months ago, I would have loved to have had Roen run into you! I ran into so few actual down-on-his-luck Ala Mhigan Highlanders in Pearl Lane... Alas, my character has left Thanalan for the lovely frozen climes of Coerthas... but I wish you luck and much fun! Ul'dah is a wonderful RP hub.