If you can't be nice to people outside the RPC, you don't belong on the RPC.

[Melkire]

[Moderator Hardhat]

 

I split off / culled the links to tumblr (EDIT: along with associated griping). We're here to have a discussion, not to point fingers or to incite drama. If you can't take part without doing so, then please refrain from posting.

 

(EDIT 2: Beast of habit. Next time, I'll let the posts sit and mod-note them for actions taken)

 

[/Moderator Hardhat]

[Flashhelix]

Trying to guilt-trip people into not talking shit about people/things they dislike on their personal blogs isn't going to change anything. If it does anything at all it'll probably just give them more to gripe about.

[Kalooeh]

I never understood tumblr's issues with the rpc. I keep seeing people talk about how bad the community here is and I havn't seen any issues?

Granted I mostly hang out in the RP Discussion, Character Development, and Balmung events/directory (Mainly just reading people's stuff).

But it's pretty much looking like it's people starting stupid shit on tumblr over stupid things more than there being any actual major issues here.

Either way a big problem here is the hive mind issue people tend to get where they hear someone is a problem from someone else, in a very public place (like tumblr), and people take it and run with it. Often enough talking about problematic people is helpful for people like me who want to avoid certain types because of issues in the past, but often enough too I see people making claims about someone not actually all that bad, but because the people following them are friends/followers they will believe whatever the person says and often enough go on a witchhunt too

 

I have made a few friends now that are worried about others attacking me for publicly rping with them or mentioning their characters names in my stories, rp logs, wikis, etc, because someone said something about them or posted something out of context to make them look really bad, and because friends want to support friends or people want to support the people they are following and like, shit gets blown up and jerkasses start attacking people.

[111]

I agree Kalooeh.

 

It's just that sort of like submarines beneath the surface, all these battles rage on other sites and cliques.

 

Then they just come on here to launch their torpedos.

 

I wish this could just be a neutral ground for peoples beefs. A no beef zone. Like those cows in india they can't eat.

[Nebbs]

In simple terms I don't see how debating nuances helps.

 

Yes people will have their opinions, but we are all free to ignore those opinions. We get to choose how it affects us. So choose to ignore the hate (if you get hate) and be happy.

 

[EDIT - image removed after warning.. instead I wrote the answer. Sorry I am a picture person not a wordy person.]

[Edit 2 - btw thanks for the rep for the pic also ♥]

 

Mod Note: User was sent a PM, as this post breaches the "image macro / meme post" rule of Section 1. No warning issued for first-time violation. - Melkire

[111]

In simple terms I don't see how debating nuances helps.

 

Yes people will have their opinions, but we are all free to ignore those opinions. We get to choose how it affects us. So choose to ignore the hate (if you get hate) and be happy.

 

[EDIT - image removed after warning.. instead I wrote the answer. Sorry I am a picture person not a wordy person.]

[Edit 2 - btw thanks for the rep for the pic also ♥]

 

Mod Note: User was sent a PM, as this post breaches the "image macro / meme post" rule of Section 1. No warning issued for first-time violation.

 

If you don't see how debating nuance helps, you don't need to participate.

 

I think arguing about sports teams is dumb, but I don't interject myself into the conversation and tell people how wrong they are for wondering which team of men in brightly colored outfits is better at moving a ball around than another group of people in brightly colored outfits.

[Nebbs]

In simple terms I don't see how debating nuances helps.

 

Yes people will have their opinions, but we are all free to ignore those opinions. We get to choose how it affects us. So choose to ignore the hate (if you get hate) and be happy.

 

[EDIT - image removed after warning.. instead I wrote the answer. Sorry I am a picture person not a wordy person.]

[Edit 2 - btw thanks for the rep for the pic also ♥]

 

Mod Note: User was sent a PM, as this post breaches the "image macro / meme post" rule of Section 1. No warning issued for first-time violation.

 

If you don't see how debating nuance helps, you don't need to participate.

 

I think arguing about sports teams is dumb, but I don't interject myself into the conversation and tell people how wrong they are for wondering which team of men in brightly colored outfits is better at moving a ball around than another group of people in brightly colored outfits.

 

I don't need to but I choose to. *hugs* I still don't think you will help anyone with nuances.. if it was even your exchanges I was referring to.

[Gone.]

Yes people will have their opinions, but we are all free to ignore those opinions. We get to choose how it affects us. So choose to ignore the hate (if you get hate) and be happy.

 

This greatly oversimplifies the negative sides of socialization. If you happen to have anxiety and/or self-esteem issues, ignoring things isn't an option, much less a consideration to begin with. It will haunt you for a very, very long time.

 

It's why sweeping harassment and bullying up under the rug just makes things worse by neglecting the issue entirely, if not harmful to those around us. Words can and do hurt, even kill. Just take a look at all the high profile suicide cases there have been over the past year. It's all the proof anyone needs.

 

That people don't seem to realize why situations like this are concerning honestly scares me.

[Warren Castille]

Yes people will have their opinions, but we are all free to ignore those opinions. We get to choose how it affects us. So choose to ignore the hate (if you get hate) and be happy.

 

This greatly oversimplifies the negative sides of socialization. If you happen to have anxiety and/or self-esteem issues, ignoring things isn't an option, much less a consideration to begin with. It will haunt you for a very, very long time.

 

It's why sweeping harassment and bullying up under the rug just makes things worse by neglecting the issue entirely, if not harmful to those around us. Words can and do hurt, even kill. Just take a look at all the high profile suicide cases there have been over the past year. It's all the proof anyone needs.

 

That people don't seem to realize why situations like this are concerning honestly scares me.

 

I'm inclined to agree. It's nice to tell people to be optimistic about these sort of things and I'm sure is coming from a positive place, but it sounds like "It's YOUR fault if people hurt your feelings!"

[Nebbs]

Yes people will have their opinions, but we are all free to ignore those opinions. We get to choose how it affects us. So choose to ignore the hate (if you get hate) and be happy.

 

This greatly oversimplifies the negative sides of socialization. If you happen to have anxiety and/or self-esteem issues, ignoring things isn't an option, much less a consideration to begin with. It will haunt you for a very, very long time.

 

It's why sweeping harassment and bullying up under the rug just makes things worse by neglecting the issue entirely, if not harmful to those around us. Words can and do hurt, even kill. Just take a look at all the high profile suicide cases there have been over the past year. It's all the proof anyone needs.

 

That people don't seem to realize why situations like this are concerning honestly scares me.

 

 

I agree and I don't think we can fix tumbler (it is a symptom of humanity not a cause), some things "just are" and resilience and support are the only defence, unless you have ways to sanction and rehabilitate people.

[111]

Yes people will have their opinions, but we are all free to ignore those opinions. We get to choose how it affects us. So choose to ignore the hate (if you get hate) and be happy.

 

This greatly oversimplifies the negative sides of socialization. If you happen to have anxiety and/or self-esteem issues, ignoring things isn't an option, much less a consideration to begin with. It will haunt you for a very, very long time.

 

It's why sweeping harassment and bullying up under the rug just makes things worse by neglecting the issue entirely, if not harmful to those around us. Words can and do hurt, even kill. Just take a look at all the high profile suicide cases there have been over the past year. It's all the proof anyone needs.

 

That people don't seem to realize why situations like this are concerning honestly scares me.

 

 

I agree and I don't think we can fix tumbler (it is a symptom of humanity not a cause), some things "just are" and resilience and support are the only defence, unless you have ways to sanction and rehabilitate people.

 

Cool, we've established that you think this is an unsolvable problem.

 

Thank you for your input.

[Nebbs]

Yes people will have their opinions, but we are all free to ignore those opinions. We get to choose how it affects us. So choose to ignore the hate (if you get hate) and be happy.

 

This greatly oversimplifies the negative sides of socialization. If you happen to have anxiety and/or self-esteem issues, ignoring things isn't an option, much less a consideration to begin with. It will haunt you for a very, very long time.

 

It's why sweeping harassment and bullying up under the rug just makes things worse by neglecting the issue entirely, if not harmful to those around us. Words can and do hurt, even kill. Just take a look at all the high profile suicide cases there have been over the past year. It's all the proof anyone needs.

 

That people don't seem to realize why situations like this are concerning honestly scares me.

 

 

I agree and I don't think we can fix tumbler (it is a symptom of humanity not a cause), some things "just are" and resilience and support are the only defence, unless you have ways to sanction and rehabilitate people.

 

Cool, we've established that you think this is an unsolvable problem.

 

Thank you for your input.

 

Glad we could find some mutual ground, and thank you for being understanding *hugs*

[Nako Vesh]

I must say, I'm pretty pleased that this discussion didn't devolve completely into crying about "tumblrinas"/SJWs/feminists/triggerwarnings/whatever. I am sosososo tired of people screaming "damn you Social Justice Warriors!!!!11" every time someone disagrees with them.

[Edvyn]

ranting in private is fun

 

ranting in public is fun

 

if they brought chatlogs it's all good

 

the chatlogs never lie

 

if someone is shit and you must blog about them, say nothing

 

let them speak for themselves

 

8-)

[Sailor July]

I must say, I'm pretty pleased that this discussion didn't devolve completely into crying about "tumblrinas"/SJWs/feminists/triggerwarnings/whatever. I am sosososo tired of people screaming "damn you Social Justice Warriors!!!!11" every time someone disagrees with them.

 

This is really interesting, because I was thinking of something similar earlier. I don't support SJWs or feminism (I am an equalist), however I don't actively look for those posts and start yelling in people's faces because they do! I think you need to put yourself on the other end of stuff like that. Everyone has that which they do and do not like. I may not associate with some people because of their beliefs, but I don't try to change them either. I wouldn't want people to yell at me for supporting LGBTQ rights, for instance. Plus, yelling does nothing. If you want to actually change the world, lead by example and don't expect everyone to follow you, we're not all the same and that's a good thing.

[111]

Yes people will have their opinions, but we are all free to ignore those opinions. We get to choose how it affects us. So choose to ignore the hate (if you get hate) and be happy.

 

This greatly oversimplifies the negative sides of socialization. If you happen to have anxiety and/or self-esteem issues, ignoring things isn't an option, much less a consideration to begin with. It will haunt you for a very, very long time.

 

It's why sweeping harassment and bullying up under the rug just makes things worse by neglecting the issue entirely, if not harmful to those around us. Words can and do hurt, even kill. Just take a look at all the high profile suicide cases there have been over the past year. It's all the proof anyone needs.

 

That people don't seem to realize why situations like this are concerning honestly scares me.

 

 

I agree and I don't think we can fix tumbler (it is a symptom of humanity not a cause), some things "just are" and resilience and support are the only defence, unless you have ways to sanction and rehabilitate people.

 

Cool, we've established that you think this is an unsolvable problem.

 

Thank you for your input.

 

Glad we could find some mutual ground, and thank you for being understanding *hugs*

 

I wouldn't hug you if I was paid to do so.

[ArmachiA]

TUMBLR.

 

I have a Tumblr, but I mostly use it for fandom stuff, though I've been watching FFXIV drama over there (There's been a lot lately, yall are missing out!). I'm not really a part of the FFXIV Tumblr community myself, so I mostly just watch what they do while reblogging some Japanese idol gifs or talking about RP in general.

 

There are a lot of callouts and people can get mean, but sometimes I think callouts are necessary. Wait! Wait! There's a reason. There's been more than a few Tumblr callouts about sexual harassment that I think was beneficial for the community to know about. There is really no where else to go except to tumblr for those kinds of things. Stories, and proof, about how certain members of the community were pressuring others for sex and the like. It was pretty horrifying, and was brave of those people to make a callout. So in that regard, I think it's kind of a good thing that platform is there.

 

There is a lot of passive aggressive BS there though. "I'm going to say this about this because it's my personal space so eff off" kind of stuff instead of just talking with the parties they need to talk to. It's not for venting, as much a people say it is, because you can easily vent in a place that's not as easily accessible to the general public. It's saying it in a place where you hope a bunch of people will agree with you and make you feel validated. It's not venting, it's inciting.

 

However, talking about people behind their backs? Everyone does it, I think in that instance intent and context matters. Just blowing off some frustration? That's okay. Got into an argument with said person and need to let it out for awhile? Just fine. Making a harmless, though somewhat mean spirited joke? That's okay, too. Doing it with the intent of being completely two faced and not dealing with your issues with said person and instead trying to poison their reputation to your friends so you can feel validated? NOT OKAY.

 

The thing is, it isn't Tumblr itself. The person who does it on Tumblr would just... find another place to do it if it wasn't Tumblr. There are just some toxic, immature people out there.

[Nebbs]

 

This greatly oversimplifies the negative sides of socialization. If you happen to have anxiety and/or self-esteem issues, ignoring things isn't an option, much less a consideration to begin with. It will haunt you for a very, very long time.

 

It's why sweeping harassment and bullying up under the rug just makes things worse by neglecting the issue entirely, if not harmful to those around us. Words can and do hurt, even kill. Just take a look at all the high profile suicide cases there have been over the past year. It's all the proof anyone needs.

 

That people don't seem to realize why situations like this are concerning honestly scares me.

 

 

I agree and I don't think we can fix tumbler (it is a symptom of humanity not a cause), some things "just are" and resilience and support are the only defence, unless you have ways to sanction and rehabilitate people.

 

Cool, we've established that you think this is an unsolvable problem.

 

Thank you for your input.

 

Glad we could find some mutual ground, and thank you for being understanding *hugs*

 

I wouldn't hug you if I was paid to do so.

 

That's okay they are free *hug* I'll save it anyhow

[ProvaDiServo]

I wouldn't hug you if I was paid to do so.

 

 

 

 

*Air hornx6*

[111]

 

 

I wouldn't hug you if I was paid to do so.

 

That's okay they are free *hug* I'll save it anyhow

 

To get this thread back on topic.

 

I also dislike adult males who use cutesy language like they're 12 year old girls. Does that happen a lot on Tumblr? We should discuss it.

[SessionZero]

 

I also dislike adult males who use cutesy language like they're 12 year old girls. Does that happen a lot on Tumblr? We should discuss it.

 

Can you give specific examples of cutesy language that triggers you you dislike?

[111]

 

I also dislike adult males who use cutesy language like they're 12 year old girls. Does that happen a lot on Tumblr? We should discuss it.

 

Can you give specific examples of cutesy language that triggers you you dislike?

 

Snuggly-Wuggly. If you post that on Tumblr you shouldn't be allowed on RPC.

[Nebbs]

 

 

I wouldn't hug you if I was paid to do so.

 

That's okay they are free *hug* I'll save it anyhow

 

To get this thread back on topic.

 

I also dislike adult males who use cutesy language like they're 12 year old girls. Does that happen a lot on Tumblr? We should discuss it.

 

I am sorry that my style offends you, you can always not respond and block me, that way you won't have to read any of my posts. Have a nice day disliking things.

[111]

 

 

I wouldn't hug you if I was paid to do so.

 

That's okay they are free *hug* I'll save it anyhow

 

To get this thread back on topic.

 

I also dislike adult males who use cutesy language like they're 12 year old girls. Does that happen a lot on Tumblr? We should discuss it.

 

I am sorry that my style offends you, you can always not respond and block me, that way you won't have to read any of my posts. Have a nice day disliking things.

 

No one ever said that *hugs*

[Melkire]

[Moderator Hardhat]

 

Discussion seems to have run its course. There does seem to be room for several off-shoots on specific subjects. If anyone would like to discuss those matters further, please create a new thread, as I'll be locking this one now.

 

^^

 

[/Moderator Hardhat]