Describe your backstory in the worst way!

[Lamia]

Levinth: Last living son of oldest ishgardian noble family becomes a talking wall attempting to master politics and stab things with a stick repeatedly.

 

Lamia: Ex-ishgardian athiest flees home and attempts to change the world through fashion, hair, makeup and jewelry.

[Martiallais]

Martiallais: Youngest child is blacklisted/dubbed black sheep of the family for choosing family over religion. Then becomes every fantasy knight cliche ever in an attempt to save everyone.

 

Aedan: Yo ho yo ho, it's a pirate's life for me!...except he's only good at axe murdering people and terrible at actual ship duties. Grows a conscious (sort of) and decides to axe murder (mostly) monsters for Maelstrom, money, and hot ladies.

[Askier]

Askier Mergrey: Angry Garlean deserter turned terrorist who's abusive disposition toward his son is only sated during his constant self destructing boozing and whoring while chain smoking his lungs black.

 

Jin'li Epinoch: Rape survivor goes insane from traumatic childhood and goes about plunging the world into chaos as a coping mechanism.

[Tamm'lin]

Tamm'lin Maertena; Entirely too energetic catgirl murders a dude who totally deserved it with her best friend, who is also a potato, then runs away - Only to start a life of crime that really is mostly just mean girling the other bandits.

[Lady Whiteraven]

Benedict: Dirty bum with way too many emotional issues seeks meaning to life while butchering people who piss him off.

[FuzzyMattress]

Sacred Ash:Socially Awkward Roegadyn is doomed from birth to become a demonic ingredient, so he decides to delve even deeper into the study of dark arts while working as a butler.

[Rowe]

Socially inept knight fanboy-who-looks-like-a-girl tries and fails to make friends / adventuring buddies!

[Andromeda]

Iris - The most unlikely series of events to ever produce an Ishgardian noble. Ever. 

 

Izayoi - Turns out Eorzea didn't need more couriers.

[Delilah Scythewood]

Lili - Such MILF. Many children. Sky pirates and guns. Wow.

[Dravus]

Ill-fated idealistic Garlean half-breed with conflicted loyalties and a heavy burden atop his shoulders.

[Asmodean]

Aimless wander trying to find himself, ends up adopting a unicolt. Now just tried to fun work to the feed the little monster's unending hunger. Willing to work for food.

[Syerra]

Syerra: Idealist orphan claws her way up the social ladder, only to fall in love with heir to merchant nobility. Fate ties them together. Their secret lives may tear them apart.

 

(( Seriously, from this point of view, it's a Nicholas Sparks novel. ))

[TheLastCandle]

Yvelont: Exiled knight returns home, "dies;" becomes Batman with dragon motif.

[Mithgar Wirasch]

24 year old with PTSD and has an extensive background of being sheltered through his entire life for mating.

 

Doesn't know how to read properly & always gullible. (he is progressing though)

[Pastry Army]

Blind woman learns how to punch things really good like. Starts to get into lots of fights and teaching people how to punch good to.

[Noah]

Disobeyed daddy, got told to go away and think about what he did.

[Klynzahr]

Klyn: Unemployed sailor kills to pay the bills and runs away from the results.

 

Dani: Hardheaded career soldier gives up family to save the world and looses both.

 

Kuina: Betrays her homeland for knowledge, betrays her teachers for freedom, wastes her freedom searching for home.

[Kurt S.]

Sofine Iseterre.

- Rogue giraffe is framed for killing fellow rogues and being a pirate's mistress. Rogue giraffe actually kills fellow rogues in her quest to clear her name. Will never clear her name.

[Alothia]

Pink-haired cat girl turns Mary Sue because of a tragic past in which she did a lot of fucked up shit.

[Raeje]

Misplaced her family, almost burned to death, became an awkward weirdo.

[FreelanceWizard]

L'yhta: Whiny catgirl teenager runs away from home, becomes dangerously well-armed whiny catgirl adult who joins a cult.

[Warren Castille]

Man ignores destiny, is repeatedly slapped by it until he wises up

[Mia Moui]

An usually tall and angry catgirl kills sex traffickers for reasons.

[Heidrek]

Orphan shaped by the crucible of war doomed to only find meaning through further violence.

[FrigidChick]

Bertholdt Hoover: Feral Elezen child--(who was found & raised by Highlanders). At 16 he underwent a serious growth spurt-- and made the shocking realization that he's NOT a Highlander.

 

Sylvie Zan: Miqo'te who mistook a bottle of Fantasia for a bottle of Patron. 

She is now an Au Ra.

 

Dare Zan: Sylvie's twin brother, who's searching for his 'stupid', party girl sister.

 

Olive Yuu: Roegababe who easily gets seasick & hates fish. Pirate family poked fun at her so much, she ran away from home and resides in Ul dah. 

 

Ray Shinto: Elezen Possessed with a spirit from another world (Vana'diel). Drunk a bottle of Fantasia in hopes of forgetting his sh*tty former life. Now, he's an Au Ra male with memories of a former sh*tty life.