If you can't be nice to people outside the RPC, you don't belong on the RPC.

[T'caska Khevo]

Simply put, I think its sad if someone feels the need to run off and post anywhere about an issue they are having with someone or a group of someones.

 

A lot of us here take this game and our RP seriously but when it gets to the point that you start digging into the nasty parts of yourself to intentionally be mean to someone over internet, you need to stop and take a look at yourself.

 

Bad shit happens in real life all the time and a lot of us escape that real life to forget about it for a moment. Don't add bad shit to world we escape to. Something got you pissed off or down? Talk to someone IRL about it or go punch a wall for a bit. Don't hide behind freedom of speech just so you can make someone else look bad or feel bad.

 

Spread some love around or shut the hell up if you don't have any to spread.

[shotgunbadger]

No it's really not the same at all to say 'hey someone who's acting abusive, you're a dick'. That's like the dumb 'if someone starts a fight with you and you fight back you're both equally in trouble' school stuff, sure in the grand cosmic scheme you'd probably be the better person if you just ignored people like that but if you say 'man fuck you then' to someone being abusive the abusive person is still 100% the dick in that situation.

 

Like, I have no clue what spurred this so maybe I'm wrong and this is a vast plot to silence dissidents in the world's lamest dictatorial power grab or something but the principle of 'if you act like a dick behind our backs and we bust you we're not gonna forget that you're a dick just because you did it in a different place' is fairly reasonable.

 

They 100% have the right to say whatever they want on Tumblr or whatever sparked this, but as RPC is not the government (again unless the lamest dictatorial power grab happened in which case bow to your new Lala overlords) nor their employer or any other position of power over them, the RPC staff also 100% has the right to say 'you're a dick, you're probably not welcome here if you're a dick'. Freedom of speech is not freedom from consequence.

[OttoVann]

Hell yeah I'm bashing people who go on tumblr and act like savages about the FFXIV RP/RPC community, or at least 'poison the well' and expect no consequence. Damn straight I want to demean it. People should shun that sort of behavior, preferably in game, so it dies off.

 

By the way, I'm not talking about like diary entries, or you saw some rp that you thought was kind of bad and commented on it. I'm talking about witch-hunt fueling (and hoping to start) diatribes and just straight inhumane nastiness. These same people that act the fool then come here like its no problem that they are actively trying to make the world (or this place, and the world we rp in) a more negative place. They should be slapped, but since we can't have that, they should be ignored by people and avoided. That's my take and you won't here my apologize for it.

 

Whats your point? That they somehow have equal footing compared to me? Please. Why are you trying to conflate me with them?

[Melodia]

Spread some love around or shut the hell up if you don't have any to spread.

 

This. 'Nuff said.

[Warren Castille]

A lot of us here take this game and our RP seriously but when it gets to the point that you start digging into the nasty parts of yourself to intentionally be mean to someone over internet, you need to stop and take a look at yourself.

 

The people who need to heed this the most are the same sorts of people to think it doesn't apply to them.

 

"I'm justified! This guy deserves it!"

[ProvaDiServo]

I just wanna know why all the sudden this has become a major issue?

 

Like real life, there are some places on the web were shit just aint friendly and you gotta roll the windows up and slouch down behind the wheel as you pass by.

 

This isn't a new thing, and it's not going to go away because it hurts feelings, you know?

[Alothia]

I just wanna know why all the sudden this has become a major issue?

 

Like real life, there are some places on the web were shit just aint friendly and you gotta roll the windows up and slouch down behind the wheel as you pass by.

 

This isn't a new thing, and it's not going to go away because it hurts feelings, you know?

 

I think that the reason it has become a thing is because recently, there has been an overabundance of negativity in the FFXIV tumblr community. I have my tumblr. I see the negativity. It's there. I don't talk about it with anyone outside of my FC, because I don't feel it's my place. But I certainly take note of it. And I think it's a shame.

[LiadansWhisper]

Welcome to the internet (and to RP in general).

 

Where is that picture...

 

 

:thumbsup:

 

With that said, there are hypocrites everywhere, including in the RP community.  It's not confined to tumblr, or any other social media platform.  It's in your social circles, your job community, your schools.  Some people simply have multiple faces - one they show to you when facing you, another they show to others when your back is turned, etc.  The only difference I've ever seen is that, in general, role-players tend to be a bit more passive aggressive about it than other groups of people.

 

That said, if someone is harassing you, there are options.  And no, saying they think you suck is not "harassment."  That's just an opinion, man.  But if you are actually being harassed, report the harassment to the owners of wherever it's posted (if online) or the police (if via phone, texts, or emails).  It may take you making repeated reports for anything of note to happen, because most companies (and even the police) tend to err on the side of caution.

 

If you're concerned with someone slandering/libeling you, that is a whole other kettle of fish.  In the US, at least, it is considered a purely Civil matter, which means that you're probably going to have to take it to court to do anything about it (which is expensive).

 

Or, you can suck it up, shake your head, and move on.  The people who matter won't believe the lies.  The people who do believe the lies don't matter.

[Unnamed Mercenary]

I just wanna know why all the sudden this has become a major issue?

 

Like real life, there are some places on the web were shit just aint friendly and you gotta roll the windows up and slouch down behind the wheel as you pass by.

 

This isn't a new thing, and it's not going to go away because it hurts feelings, you know?

 

I think it's because a of a recent influx of people trying to say "this is my personal blog/diary/journal" to get away with "PSA: I THINK THIS PERSON IS BAD AND EVERYONE SHOULD HATE AND AVOID THAT PERSON TOO!" posts. ...it's not a personal piece of writing when it's literally being used to promote negative behavior. ...We're all adults (or close enough in the border cases) to know how to be respectable people. I don't see the need to publicly post something that will be forever indexed and searchable (by let's just say Google for speed) forever.

 

The internet archives everything. One of the things the university I attended preached was that social media was effectively a digital tattoo. Let's be respectful and work on solving issues, everyone (that reads this). I'd like to think we're above having to "vagueblog" or "call someone out without saying their name, but they'll totally know it's for them".

 

Moving on to stay positive is a good step. But it also requires acknowledging whatever negative things might have happened and the intentions behind them. Good intentions and lead to bad actions. Bad intentions can look like good actions, in just the right light.

 

Like the first rule of the RPC, let's be excellent to each other here and elsewhere.

[Askier]

Hell yeah I'm bashing people who go on tumblr and act like savages . . .

 

Whats your point?  That they somehow have equal footing compared to me?  Please.  Why are you trying to conflate me with them?

Well. Yes. You just called them savages. 

 

From my perspective, no matter what they said, you just made yourself like them by demeaning them with that insulting word.

 

They are humans just like you and me. And certainly not agreeing with them is allowed. But to attack back just keeps the cycle going.

[LiadansWhisper]

 

 

I think it's because a of a recent influx of people trying to say "this is my personal blog/diary/journal" to get away with "PSA: I THINK THIS PERSON IS BAD AND EVERYONE SHOULD HATE AND AVOID THAT PERSON TOO!" posts. ...it's not a personal piece of writing when it's literally being used to promote negative behavior. ...We're all adults (or close enough in the border cases) to know how to be respectable people. I don't see the need to publicly post something that will be forever indexed and searchable (by let's just say Google for speed) forever.

 

I'll admit that I've seen a lot of what I can only call witch hunts (sorry, but it applies) wherein a person is accused of something fairly awful, and while there is no proof, they are essentially labeled the antichrist, with people exhorting others to publicly shun them, etc.

 

It's one reason why I avoid Tumblr in general (tho I have an account there), and why I tend to look at people who are seriously into Tumblr with a squinty eyes.  I know there are many people on Tumblr who are nothing like that, but it's really hard to tell just in general.

[shotgunbadger]

I use Tumblr almost exclusively for cute fan art, pictures of butts, and weird stuff like birds with arms.

[OttoVann]

I'll take it for the team on this, feel free to heed my advice and shun me and more.

[Desu Nee]

My opinions on tumblr in a nutshell

[LiadansWhisper]

I'll take it for the team on this, feel free to heed my advice and shun me and more.

 

Don't make me come over there.  :evil:

[Warren Castille]

I'll take it for the team on this, feel free to heed my advice and shun me and more.

 

Don't make me come over there.  :evil:

 

heyoooooooooooo

[Unnamed Mercenary]

Hell yeah I'm bashing people who go on tumblr and act like savages . . .

 

Whats your point?  That they somehow have equal footing compared to me?  Please.  Why are you trying to conflate me with them?

Well. Yes. You just called them savages. 

 

From my perspective, no matter what they said, you just made yourself like them by demeaning them with that insulting word.

 

They are humans just like you and me. And certainly not agreeing with them is allowed. But to attack back just keeps the cycle going.

 

What about when a given person continues a cycle with no other initiative? When they choose to be rude only for the sake of hurting others, threatening to "release a bunch of shit on [this] person"?

 

Yelling back at them isn't the best way to counter it. In fact, I agree that it would likely make things worse. ...but I do think abusive behavior needs to be called out, so the person can work on bettering their actions. I don't like to think people are inherently bad, or that they get their fun from watching other people (sometimes former friends or associates) squirm. But what about when direct communication no longer becomes an option? When a situation that could be solved by a calm, collected discussion instead turns into shunning and hate? Or even just evasion of the issue?

 

--

 

Hypothetical situation/question to all:

 

If I broke my arm and I was told to give it a rest while in a cast, I'd do so. Once my arm was healed, the cast would be removed. I've seen people who will just assume their arm has been amputated and pretend it doesn't exist anymore instead of trying to move it around and get it back into use. How would one go about trying to convince a person that their arm is no longer broken? That it's -OK- to use it again. Acknowledge it's there?

[OttoVann]

I'll take it for the team on this, feel free to heed my advice and shun me and more.

 

Don't make me come over there.  :evil:

 

I like green girls, bring it.

[Reiner Dorn]

 

Mod Note: User was sent a PM, as this post breaches the "image macro / meme post" rule of Section 1. No warning issued for first-time violation. - Melkire

[Desu Nee]

--

 

Hypothetical situation/question to all:

 

If I broke my arm and I was told to give it a rest while in a cast, I'd do so. Once my arm was healed, the cast would be removed. I've seen people who will just assume their arm has been amputated and pretend it doesn't exist anymore instead of trying to move it around and get it back into use. How would one go about trying to convince a person that their arm is no longer broken? That it's -OK- to use it again. Acknowledge it's there?

Takes time to remember that. I broke my arm once, badly so in a car crash. It's really hard to forget the pain, and sometimes it just strikes again, even if you arm is completely fine. Ultimately, it's like a mental fisioterapy, taking step after step to fully use your arm again.

 

That also depends on people, too. How I would go...simply give it time. Remember once in a while but not insist, because ultimately the effort comes from the person not me. And the person don't need to be constantly reminded of that, but reminded enough to yes, you can use your arm.

[Flickering Ember]

I use Tumblr on a daily basis, and I must say that I never notice any drama. Granted, I can't check every single entry from the FFXIV tag, but still, I don't understand where the idea that Tumblr is a dramafest for immature people came from (?_?)

Most of the things I see are people posting screenshots and having fun.

 

As for this case in particular, I can't comment because I don't know what it's about.

 

Same. I am following 70-something people, all Balmung folks. Not seen any drama. I have one time seen people talk about RPC on tumblr and it was all reasonable feedback that one of the mods even responded to. 

 

I guess I am just not following the people doing this? I don't have any examples to go off here. I don't think we can forcibly remove someone from RPC for doing that on tumblr but I can at least agree that tumblr is a part of the Balmung community too, not just RPC. We gotta take care of our community and that's all I'm gonna say.

[Desu Nee]

I use Tumblr on a daily basis, and I must say that I never notice any drama. Granted, I can't check every single entry from the FFXIV tag, but still, I don't understand where the idea that Tumblr is a dramafest for immature people came from (?_?)

Most of the things I see are people posting screenshots and having fun.

 

As for this case in particular, I can't comment because I don't know what it's about.

 

Same. I am following 70-something people, all Balmung folks. Not seen any drama. I have one time seen people talk about RPC on tumblr and it was all reasonable feedback that one of the mods even responded to. 

 

I guess I am just not following the people doing this? I don't have any examples to go off here. I don't think we can forcibly remove someone from RPC for doing that on tumblr but I can at least agree that tumblr is a part of the Balmung community too, not just RPC. We gotta take care of our community and that's all I'm gonna say.

Tumblr is a beast with many masks. Most drama of Tumblr comes when you see stuff related to Feminism, Fandoms, SJW, this sorta thing. I dare to say 60 to 70% of Tumblr IS pretty chill, and fun to see. As I said, I go there for Cool Porn and Dinosaurs, and if I'm lucky, Cool Dinosaur Porn.

 

Ultimately, it really depends on who you follow and the tags you search. And, also ultimately, negatives are always enhanced on the Internet. 4/8chan is a place full of pedos mental sick people, Tumblr is full of SJW Muh Soggy Nee, Facebook is full of attention whores, Roleplayers are a bunch of no life sad basement dwellers, only kids play COD, Popular People are snobbish, etc etc etc.

 

You can really find a decent group almost anywhere, except if you browse Stormfront. Then, I'll just ask what the frick is wrong with you.

[allgivenover]

We all talk shit about a lot of people privately all the time,

 

Speak for yourself, unless you just mean your own social circle?

 

Seriously, this is not something "we all" do.

 

 

 

 

 

Look over my post history, if I talk anything close to shit I'll do it publicly. It also helps that I don't really talk to anyone here outside of the forum itself.

 

 

Yeah dawg that's what  I'm saying, if you make call outs publicly, I'm pretty sure you make em privately. Everyone complains about something in privacy even the most openly vocal, regardless of your association.

 

Except I don't.

 

Like I said, it really helps that I don't interact with any of you outside of the forum.

[Makyn Loneseeker]

Someone find a picture of the Baltimore Riot and tag it "suddenly, a thread on the RPC"?

 

In all seriousness, though, using harsh words on other harsh words is not going to solve anything. I'm going to take from earlier posts and say why can't we all just SMILE and spread love around and accept that others are different. Sure you have a voice, but why should you quell anothers?

[Alothia]

Again, just as I've said here before, if you feel like you're getting emotional over something, it's probably best to step away from forums and social networking.

 

Perhaps people don't intend for it to become bullying when they first post. Sure, they're just venting about stuff. But people have a hive mentality sometimes. And when someone responds to that and adds on, then yeah, it's justified. I should keep doing this. And so they do.  It's a vicious cycle.

 

One thing I love about Tumblr is the draft system. I can write something, save it as a draft, and then go back and read it later, decide if it's really what I wanted to say. Most of the time, I realize it was something I wrote in the heat of the moment, and it gets deleted.

 

I don't know that people go there inherently to start drama. I like to think that people don't. Sure, it happens. Sure, there are those people that will. But I think most people don't go to social networking with the intention of starting something. They just want to vent, want their voice to be heard, and move on. And that's great, as long as it doesn't make someone else feel like poop.

 

Are there times where I'd like to hold people accountable for their actions on other sites here on the RPC? Sure. But we don't moderate the rest of the internet. We can't. If people hold to the rules here, I can't hold them accountable for what they do elsewhere. 

 

I'd just like to ask, again, that people really think about what they're posting and not post in the heat of the moment: here or anywhere else. It's hurtful to other people sometimes. It can be hurtful to yourself. You never know who sees what you're posting. There's really no way of knowing. And if you wouldn't say those things to the person's face, you shouldn't say them anywhere else.

 

That's my 2 gil on the matter. Take it or leave it.