Thoughts about intersex (NSFW-ish discussion)

[CrimsonMars]

I'm in the process about writing my alts wiki page and I'm seriously thinking about making her born a hermaphrodite. HEAR ME OUT. I'm not doing this for the sole purpose of erp,  but just something my character has to go through. Xanadu would be fairly shy about it and may even go through some sort of gender crisis. If she were to 'mate' with anyone, it would be with whom she likes/trust. And even then, it would take a little bit of convincing. I know some would be a little turned off by the idea, and that there are some who are naturally futas or temporary become one themselves (via potions, etc). I'm just curious as to what some of you might think.

[Virella]

I'm in the process about writing my alts wiki page and I'm seriously thinking about making her born a hermaphrodite. HEAR ME OUT. I'm not doing this for the sole purpose of erp,  but just something my character has to go through. Xanadu would be fairly shy about it and may even go through some sort of gender crisis. If she were to 'mate' with anyone, it would be with whom she likes/trust. And even then, it would take a little bit of convincing. I know some would be a little turned off by the idea, and that there are some who are naturally futas or temporary become one themselves (via potions, etc). I'm just curious as to what some of you might think.

Don't see why it should be a problem tbh, as long you don't make your character's gender/sexuality ect the focus of your roleplay. Treat it respectfully, and I don't think anyone would have an issue with it?

[Aaron]

Go for it. 

 

Experimenting is what's makes life fun

[Mia Moui]

I think it's fairly traditional for players to swap genders for their characters so playing someone with ambiguous gender, no gender, nonconforming gender, trans, or intersex would be something I'd like to see more of.  People who are straight play as gay and gay people play straight.  People roleplay different races routinely.

 

The key is being respectful and not using it as the sole reason for the characters existence and their central motivating feature, in my opinion anyway.  I read a lot of young adult books and one of my pet peeves is the "issue" stories.  Be it gay or trans or class or race or mental/physical disability, it is almost always the focus of the story.  There wouldn't even be a story without that focus.

 

I much prefer stories where the character has something but it's not the star. Take Furiosa in Mad Max: Fury Road.  She is missing part of her arm and has made for herself a working mechanical had.  It's never directly part of the story, we are left to wonder how she lost it and how she made her prosthetic. It does not get in her way and she does not seek sympathy or whatever else.

 

Issue stories should exist, I think.  They are important.  But I don't think they should be the ONLY stories told or the ONLY focus of roleplay.

[S'imba]

I think it's a good idea so long as it isn't treated as a novelty. Don't say this is Jane she's a hermaphrodite. Well at least make it come off that way when people interact with them. Put some substance into it and try to avoid making it the front and center thing that makes the character interesting.

[Aoi Fukiku]

Here is how I see it. . .

 

If you want to play it then go for it. I don't really understand why there should be a need to ask unless you are going to go around telling everyone which in turn will ruin the whole experience. Only time such a thing would need to be known is if there becomes an intimacy with your character and another and they decide to go that far.

 

You shouldn't have to say anything else out in the open, IC or OOC about it otherwise. It is no one's concern on this forum.

[Miss Gaz]

Go for it!

[Steel Wolf]

I'm trying to write a character who identifies as female, even dresses in women's clothes but is male. It's been an interesting challenge. I'm kind of sitting on her right now because I want to flesh her out more in my head before I try to have her interact with people.

 

As a healer, I'm using the identity as a way for her to use it as a means to understand how all life exists and lives together. If she can bear a woman's heart in a man's body and be at balance, then she can better grasp the balance of aether and how it affects all life as she offers succor.

 

In my experience with the character in my headcanon, it has been a delicious and important challenge. It has offered an opportunity for empathy. It has made me critically think about how a person like that would be.

 

I love your idea. And I hope you can build it up. <3

[Lydia Lightfoot]

Personally, I'd say though that the kind of story you've suggested could be just as easily achieved while maintaining a specifically one-or-the-other physical anatomy. Lots and lots of real humans have that happen in their lives. Going with a "hermaphrodite" approach, while not impossible in the real world, does lend itself to feeling a little... snowflakey... in an RP environment. 

 

If you do it, do it with a mind towards biological and psychological realism, which is probably going to require you to do some research (hooray Google!). "Winging it", or, intentionally avoiding realism will give the impression that you are in fact doing it because of some sort of sex fantasy (which you've said you want to avoid).

[Edda]

I don't think it's a bad idea, but one that could be executed quite poorly. As others have said, if your game-plan is to make sure everyone ICly knows your character is a hermaphrodite, that is more than likely not going to be well received. Play it subtly, and it could work, and even if no one figures it out, it might give you some extra enjoyment playing out that particular aspect. At best, if would give your character more interesting and unique internal monologues. At worst, it would be about as superficial as saying "my character has two sets of ears!"

 

That being said, I find that more often than not people take certain "quirks" of their character and play it so hard, there is literally no character past said quirk. "Oh, my character is totally gay xD" or "My character is just always really mad about being an ex-slave!" Not that these are bad things, but when they are constantly turned up to 11 and always at the center of that person's RP, things become dull, and quickly. If you think you can avoid that trap, then go for it. If you cannot envision your character outside of being a hermaphrodite, then perhaps it would be wise to rethink things.

[CrimsonMars]

Great points so far. I do see my character as more than a hermaphrodite but at this point, I'm debating if it's really practical. After all, I don't want to make it too snow-flaky either like Calliope mentioned.

[Gone.]

Two questions to consider before going through with such a concept:

 

1. Are you hoping to entertain some fetish?

2. Will this be the core focus to your character's being?

 

If you answer is 'yes' to either, then I would suggest not going through with it; you're more likely to offend than anything else.

 

It should also be noted that 'hermaphrodite' is considered dated at best and distasteful at worst. Think of it as akin to 'tranny'; just not a term anyone should have used to begin with.

[CrimsonMars]

Despite the mostly positive feed-back, I really am having second thoughts for personal reasons. Thanks for all the feed-back though.

[Dis]

I play an Au Ra who is intersexed.  She actually has a pretty hard hate for the state of her body, and wishes she was fully female.  She identifies as female, and the state of her body only comes up if someone shows interest in her and things lead to a bedroom situation, or if someone happens to get on top of her for some fashion, and suddenly gets confused by the extra parts.  It's a constant underlying thread of her existence, because it does happen to be part of her body, but it isn't the core focus of any RP for her. 

 

As for using the term hermaphrodite (leaving out the sociopolitical aspect of things), consider the time period that is represented in the game.  Especially in certain areas (Ishgard), they may not even have the term used, as it has a mythological root (greek gods), and is technically a more scientific term.  That said, I tend to go with more spiritual-esque terms.  Zehra refers to herself as 'twin-souled', but 'dual-sexed', or 'dual-bodied' also works.  It depends on the feeling you want to give your writing.  There are all sorts of terms out there, but the one I use is meant to reference the fact that she is intersexed. 

 

I see nothing wrong with playing a character who is one or the other, or a mixture of both sexes, as people so see fit.  Approach the character as a serious character, and you'll be fine.  Include it as a singular part of the whole of the character, and people shouldn't have a problem.  Approach it as a fetishist representation of something in a strictly ERP context, and people will likely get upset or draw away from you because that isn't what they 'want to be associated with', as if that aspect of RP is somehow dirty or wrong (psst, it isn't).

 

I haven't yet worked on Zehra's wiki, but I will, and when I do, I'll reference it, probably in part of her backstory, as well as in her physical appearance.  But it's just another fact of who and what she is, and that's how it should be treated.

 

I'll let other people tell you the reason not to use certain terms.  I've never cared about being specifically politically correct, so I won't jump on that bandwagon.  As far as 'snow-flaky', that's like walking up to an actual intersexed individual and telling them, 'you're a snowflake because your body is different, you should change it'.  This is meant to be a part of your character that has serious and lasting impacts on everything from their mental well being to the way they might be treated by partners with who they want to become intimate. 

 

Just like with any other character trait that is 'different from the norm', you have to put more thought and effort into it.  Unfortunately, you have to find a better way to justify it to the community or they look at it as if you're doing it strictly for attention, even if it's just a unique challenge you want to approach in your writing.  If you want to make your character that way, do it, and enjoy the challenge.  If you feel like you're not up to it, then don't.  But don't do or not do it because of how someone 'says' it might be perceived.  That is one persons perception, and people have many different ones.

[ZoktaiKhor]

The point of roleplaying is to fill a role out. The role itself can be almost anything you can imagine. So go for it. I was intersex before on another forum and it was one hell of ride to be honest.

[Lydia Lightfoot]

It should also be noted that 'hermaphrodite' is considered dated at best and distasteful at worst. Think of it as akin to 'tranny'; just not a term anyone should have used to begin with.

 

Dated, yes.

Distasteful, no (it's a medical term, albeit a dated one, as you mentioned).

 

Is intersex the more generally used term in clinical discussion in 2015? Yes.

Is intersex the more generally used term in pop culture and media in 2015? Not yet.

 

Is nitpicking which medical term is used in a forum thread productive? Not really.

[Gone.]

I play an Au Ra who is intersexed.  She actually has a pretty hard hate for the state of her body, and wishes she was fully female.  She identifies as female, and the state of her body only comes up if someone shows interest in her and things lead to a bedroom situation, or if someone happens to get on top of her for some fashion, and suddenly gets confused by the extra parts.  It's a constant underlying thread of her existence, because it does happen to be part of her body, but it isn't the core focus of any RP for her. 

 

As for using the term hermaphrodite (leaving out the sociopolitical aspect of things), consider the time period that is represented in the game.  Especially in certain areas (Ishgard), they may not even have the term used, as it has a mythological root (greek gods), and is technically a more scientific term.  That said, I tend to go with more spiritual-esque terms.  Zehra refers to herself as 'twin-souled', but 'dual-sexed', or 'dual-bodied' also works.  It depends on the feeling you want to give your writing.  There are all sorts of terms out there, but the one I use is meant to reference the fact that she is intersexed.

 

I see nothing wrong with playing a character who is one or the other, or a mixture of both sexes, as people so see fit.  Approach the character as a serious character, and you'll be fine.  Include it as a singular part of the whole of the character, and people shouldn't have a problem.  Approach it as a fetishist representation of something in a strictly ERP context, and people will likely get upset or draw away from you because that isn't what they 'want to be associated with', as if that aspect of RP is somehow dirty or wrong (psst, it isn't).

 

I haven't yet worked on Zehra's wiki, but I will, and when I do, I'll reference it, probably in part of her backstory, as well as in her physical appearance.  But it's just another fact of who and what she is, and that's how it should be treated.

 

I'll let other people tell you the reason not to use certain terms.  I've never cared about being specifically politically correct, so I won't jump on that bandwagon.  As far as 'snow-flaky', that's like walking up to an actual intersexed individual and telling them, 'you're a snowflake because your body is different, you should change it'.  This is meant to be a part of your character that has serious and lasting impacts on everything from their mental well being to the way they might be treated by partners with who they want to become intimate.

 

Just like with any other character trait that is 'different from the norm', you have to put more thought and effort into it.  Unfortunately, you have to find a better way to justify it to the community or they look at it as if you're doing it strictly for attention, even if it's just a unique challenge you want to approach in your writing.  If you want to make your character that way, do it, and enjoy the challenge.  If you feel like you're not up to it, then don't.  But don't do or not do it because of how someone 'says' it might be perceived.  That is one persons perception, and people have many different ones.

 

You're completely missing my point entirely.

 

It has nothing to do with being 'politically correct', a poor excuse to begin with. Sensitivity towards people who actually deal with awkward and uncomfortable gender identity issues on a day-to-day basis is important. Like, really important. They get enough shit in real-life; no reason to carry it over into their chosen escape.

 

I don't have a problem with ERP, either, but as a transwoman, I do not and will never appreciate anyone turning my situation into a vehicle for their fetishes while employing the usage of disrespectful terminology (tranny, shemale, etc.), virtual or not. It's disrespectful and above all, incredibly demeaning.

 

Now I know for a fact Chiyo would have no intention of doing any of this, but for the sake of discussion, I feel it incredibly important to bring the subject up before feelings are incidentally hurt.

 

Is that really so bad?

 

Dated, yes.

Distasteful, no (it's a medical term, albeit a dated one, as you mentioned).

 

Is intersex the more generally used term in clinical discussion in 2015? Yes.

Is intersex the more generally used term in pop culture and media in 2015? Not yet.

 

Is nitpicking which medical term is used in a forum thread productive? Not really.

 

Yeah, no, please read the above. It's not nitpicking in the slightest.

[Lydia Lightfoot]

Dated, yes.

Distasteful, no (it's a medical term, albeit a dated one, as you mentioned).

 

Is intersex the more generally used term in clinical discussion in 2015? Yes.

Is intersex the more generally used term in pop culture and media in 2015? Not yet.

 

Is nitpicking which medical term is used in a forum thread productive? Not really.

 

Yeah, no, please read the above. It's not nitpicking in the slightest.

 

Hun, I'm not uneducated, and I'm involved in plenty of LGBT rights situations myself. You're totally missing the point that these are both medical terms - neither is slang, a slur, an insult, etc.

[DeathGodSkeith]

As long as you have lifelike reactions to your rp you should do whatever. If your character is intersexed im sure there would be some confidence issues, body issues, anxiety, etc. The point is to enjoy and make it feel like another life. I say go for it if you still want to. Ill roleplay with ya

[Dis]

-snip-

 

You're completely missing my point entirely.

 

It has nothing to do with being 'politically correct', a poor excuse to begin with. Sensitivity towards people who actually deal with awkward and uncomfortable gender identity issues on a day-to-day basis is important. Like, really important. They get enough shit in real-life; no reason to carry it over into their chosen escape.

 

I don't have a problem with ERP, either, but as a transwoman, I do not and will never appreciate anyone turning my situation into a vehicle for their fetishes while employing the usage of disrespectful terminology (tranny, shemale, etc.), virtual or not. It's disrespectful and above all, incredibly demeaning.

 

Now I know for a fact Chiyo would have no intention of doing any of this, but for the sake of discussion, I feel it incredibly important to bring the subject up before feelings are incidentally hurt.

 

Is that really so bad?

 

I leave it up to others to deal with the term, and the political correctness surrounding it.  When I'm speaking to someone who identifies that way, I ask what their chosen pronoun is, and refer to them that way.  I don't go into detail about their sex(es) and the way in which they're interpreted in that fashion, if at all. 

 

I don't normally bring up my gender, situation, or preferences, but since we're going there, I'm going to say that as a pansexual genderqueer individual, I get my fair share of hate. 

 

I feel as if I should direct you to the Wikipedia, and the disambiguation for Hermaphrodite as an entry.  A lot of people use the phrase as a scientific descriptor, because, as said before, intersex is still a relatively new term.  I won't debate the specifics about it with you, but given that one of my best friends told me about the term a year ago, and I had never heard of it before that point in time, and I like to consider myself pretty decently learned, it's still pretty new in frequent use.

 

These terms are still gaining traction, so of course they're not commonly used.  And the terms are interchangeable.  Considering that they're referring to a character who would have both male and female reproductive organs, that isn't an inaccurate term to use.

[Virella]

Dated, yes.

Distasteful, no (it's a medical term, albeit a dated one, as you mentioned).

 

Is intersex the more generally used term in clinical discussion in 2015? Yes.

Is intersex the more generally used term in pop culture and media in 2015? Not yet.

 

Is nitpicking which medical term is used in a forum thread productive? Not really.

 

Yeah, no, please read the above. It's not nitpicking in the slightest.

 

Hun, I'm not uneducated, and I'm involved in plenty of LGBT rights situations myself. You're totally missing the point that these are both medical terms - neither is slang, a slur, an insult, etc.

Amen.

 

Getting insulted over nothing is not going to help; especially due to the context that word was used into, it is really, really a neutral way of describing it, given Chiyo was using the medicial term for it in a neutral, open discussion about it.

[Unnamed Mercenary]

[[steps in as a mod]]

 

Let's keep the thread on topic please.

 

This is about RPing as someone who is intersex, not about the social discussion involved with it.

 

I'd like to recap Section 3 of the expanded rules (if you haven't taken the time to at least skim them, I would highly recommend it)

 

Section 3 - Discussion & Prejudiced Comments

• Discussion of a sexual nature which isn't tasteful.
  
• Attacks on, or promotion of, specific religions.
  
• Posting racist comments.
  
• Posting comments that attack another's sexual/gender identity (including but not limited to sexist and homophobic comments).
  

 

With that said, the rules do go both ways. Please do not use gender or sex identity as a means to prove a point or to further an off-topic discussion. The RPC is not really the place to have social, political and/or religious debates. While there is no rule outright banning them (like on many other forums), the staff here would like to encourage users to be respectful and not resort to jabs or passive-aggressiveness in posts.

 

[[steps out]]

[Dat Oni]

[Ahem, Franz beat me to the punch.]

[Dat Oni]

Sorry to double post, but I need to bump this thread. 

 

I'd like to say, intersex can be quite subtle, instead of cases like futanari. For instance, the character could be female with vaguely male qualities to her overall body shape, examples of her brain not knowing what to make of the two genders being in one body during adolescent development. One of the intersex characters I've seen on the RPC wiki went this route; her upper body was decidedly female, but the shape of everything below was less so. A distinct lack of womanly curves, for instance.

 

Overall, how you choose to go about this is up to you. Just try to avoid it being the only defining trait to your character.

[Hyakki]

Using the contents of your character's pants as the foundation of their entire existence is terrible and there should be so much more to them than that. Gender shouldn't matter at all in the grand scope of things.

 

Also, this is just a pet peeve but I loathe the term "mate", you're not an animal.