Your Favorite ingame flavor text

[Riven]

Currently I'm a fan of this one:

 

[Miss Gaz]

[Aaron]

"It is said the Gods kill one of these cute creatures whenever a man thinks pleasurable thoughts are unfounded."

 

- Gaelkitten 2015

[Berrod Armstrong]

"It is said the Gods kill one of these cute creatures whenever a man thinks pleasurable thoughts are unfounded."

 

- Gaelkitten 2015

This x 12,000,000

 

Berrod Gaelikitten genocide war criminal of the year 1577

[Gegenji]

It's not quite flavor text, but one of the quest objectives for the AST58 quest caught me off-guard and got a laugh out me. The past couple have had you healing people with Aspected Benefic, and you're doing it again in this one... but the last one before plot happens is: "Why aren't you still casting Aspected Benefic?"

[Riven]

"It is said the Gods kill one of these cute creatures whenever a man thinks pleasurable thoughts are unfounded."

 

- Gaelkitten 2015

...Wait.

 

WTF HAVE I JUST READ? O___o

[Larson]

It isn't flavor text, but my most favorite thing from the entire game is:

 

*drumroll*

 

"A BEAUTY REBORN"

[René Robicheaux]

So eager is Jannequinard to talk with you, it is almost as if there were a giant exclamation point hovering over his head.

[Larson]

I forgot the Lalafell in the Golden Bazaar.

 

 

"You get a pot, and YOU get a pot. Everyone gets a pot!"

 

[Sigil.9054]

This one, solely because I typically RP Seldi as a courier, so my reaction was kind of a sarcastic, "I don't know, Seldi, do you??"

[Aaron]

"It is said the Gods kill one of these cute creatures whenever a man thinks pleasurable thoughts are unfounded."

 

- Gaelkitten 2015

...Wait.

 

WTF HAVE I JUST READ? O___o

Something amazing my child lol.

 

Another fave of mine is the Gravel Golem minion.

 

"Only you stand between it and a hard place."

 

And Morbol minion.

 

"For the record, his breath is the worst of your problems."

[Masaki Moui]

Bubbly Boy: Hey, that's one of Master Beatin's [toys]! If this is supposed to be a bribe...then you've got yourself a deal, adventuring man!

[Kage]

I'm sorry chocobo T_T;

[Desu Nee]

Not flavour text, but this one literally made me pause to laugh.

Brayflox junk 2strong

[Riven]

Not flavour text, but this one literally made me pause to laugh.

Brayflox junk 2strong

...

WHAT

THE

HELL

DID

I

JUST

SEE.

O_o

[Kurt S.]

Not flavour text, but this one literally made me pause to laugh.

Brayflox junk 2strong

...

WHAT

THE

HELL

DID

I

JUST

SEE.

O_o

 

You saw Lolflox being so damn confident, all heads are turned. 

 

3sexy5you

[GloryRhodes]

Catuar Blood.

 

"Actually, this clear liquid is far closer to water than it is blood... except, that is, for the cactuar it is taken from. For him it is most definitely blood."

[Elena]

Not flavour text, but this one literally made me pause to laugh.

Brayflox junk 2strong

...

WHAT

THE

HELL

DID

I

JUST

SEE.

 

 

O_o

 

 

This was great, lol

[Capheira]

I found this amusing:

 

[Ashe]

I died when I saw this.

3.1 just ripped on Alphinaud haha.

 

Ugly Duckling's is also funny.

[Ashe]

Not flavour text, but this one literally made me pause to laugh.

Brayflox junk 2strong

...

WHAT

THE

HELL

DID

I

JUST

SEE.

 

 

O_o

 

 

This was great, lol

I cried when I got to this.

Like legit. Cried.

[Faye]

I don't know why, but a personal favorite of mine will always be a male NPC in the Golden Saucer bragging to a lady, "'El Coloso" means 'The Coloso.'"

[Oli!]

I don't know why, but a personal favorite of mine will always be a male NPC in the Golden Saucer bragging to a lady, "'El Coloso" means 'The Coloso.'"

 

 

fantasy mexico confirmed

[Pastry Army]

So eager is Jannequinard to talk with you, it is almost as if there were a giant exclamation point hovering over his head.

 

This game is a gold mine of cleaver quips and flavor texts that both add a shocking amount of relative humor, fourth wall grazing moments, and pot shots to their own game.  And this is one of the best ones I've seen. 

 

Other favorite include:

 

Wind-up Odin: Summon your wind-up Odin minion, Guaranteed not to wipe out your whole party in one fell stroke. 

 

Smallshell: Summon your Smallshell minion. The mere sight of this wee wavekin may cause severe psychological trauma to those who spent years of their lives on faraway shores culling his relatives.

 

 

Buffalo Calf: Summon your buffalo Calf minion. Milk fed until tender and juicy. Not that anyone would ever think of eating him.