Bleed-through

[Warren Castille]

Good morning everyone. I would like to discuss a serious problem that effects millions of roleplayers around the world. I'm talking about Character Bleed-through and the issues that that problem can create.

 

...Sorry, couldn't resist sounding like a medication commercial. In seriousness, though, I figure it's something we've all had to handle at one point or another. Our characters are close to us and a part of us and I know at least in myself that sometimes heaping problems onto my poor avatar's shoulders spreads some of the weight through the screen. Anyone keeping up in my thread (plug!) is aware that I keep throwing horrible things Warren's way. I realized I've spent a lot of working hours walking around in his head and contemplating, and well... It's dumb to be stressed out over problems I'm writing into his world, but hell, no one ever said roleplayers were logical or sane, right?

 

I realize I'm rambling a bit. tl;dr: anyone else catch on that they're stressing in real life over plots from the game/tabletop/LARP/elseworlds?

[Kage]

I don't know if -stressing- is the right word.... I'm certainly always thinking about the plots I am in involved in or the stuff currently happening to Kage in his face, my face, or out of my scope of view entirely.

 

I'm half expecting that as soon as I pop in game and am IC for Kage...some friends and acquaintances are going to throw a wonderful wrench into Kage's  plans and knock him out. So I sorta keep going "OK kage wants to meet certain characters 1 and 2. I want to give everyone not just the one kage meets but his friends too the chance to influence where this story goes."

 

 

Because god do I love telling stories and not allowing them the chance to change Kage's plans just doesn't seem like a good story.

 

So I think about it constantly.

[Coatleque]

Stressed out lately? Nope. Having a blast. My only stress is that Coatleque wants to help everyone but can't be everywhere at once.

 

In the past though, I RP'd as a Ranger Captain in a MERP environment. Inadvertently led a black Numenorean into a ranger stronghold. The things you do for love right? THAT was stressful.

 

I think it also depends on how strong you make the character to be. Coatleque would have very high wisdom/willpower, so she can shrug these things off easier face-to-face. On the other side her intellect is slightly lacking.

[Warren Castille]

"Stress" is probably not the right term for it to be entirely honest, but I meant more that there's a level of complexity that comes from living multiple lives? I sound like a dork.

[Kage]

As a new roleplayer, I decided to make it easier on myself by having Kage have a very large similarity to myself on how he acts.

 

Then he blew up and now I definitely spend lots of time thinking "How is he actually going to react to this. How would he react?... Kage you're a fucking doof I wish you wouldn't do this." I worry that if Kage gets involved shite is going to hit the fan. >.> Some people seem to really thrive on having things completely plotted OOCly and others just seem to like... wing it.

 

I mean my friends started to coin the term Kagetastrophe because of him. ; ;

[Eva]

From what I have seen there are a variety of thoughts on this matter, and the rigidity of that line that exists between IC and OOC.  Two - in particular - seem to stand out being more regarded than most, and neither is exactly invalid.

 

For myself I try to keep IC and OOC completely apart.  If Eva or Ben has a bad day it doesn't mandate that I be upset in "teh meatspace" or any other such thing.  I'm invested in the characters only so far as their stories go and that's really about it.  I've jibed that I sometimes view them as I might children, but it really is much different than that, and I'm not going to OOCly get upset if someone picks on my character or whatever.

 

The other school of thought seems to suggest that player become more integrated with their character and feel as they feel.  While there's really nothing wrong with this, and I will admit at times to having come down from time to time with a severe case of "the feelz" at particularly dramatic moments in the game, it has never really asserted itself after I log out.  I ponder or speculate and such, but I have known of RPers that do seem to invest their own emotions into what happens to their character and I've seen this lead to some pretty awful stuff in a few cases.

 

So I guess for my part, some allowance to more completely experience and understand a character's emotions and motivations and thought process might not be such a bad thing.  Stress comes in a variety of forms and those who manage guilds are apt to feel a certain amount of this no matter what - so I wouldn't dream of saying that if the game is causing stress you should log out or such.  There are absolutely rewards - and good RP experiences is one valuable take-away that is worth whatever aggravation may come for me every single time.

 

But I think if you're so over-invested in your character that any sort of negative things that happen to him or her are negatively impacting your life as a player than I think it's time to take a step back and evaluate your level of bleed-through, whether you're taking things personally that you shouldn't be, and possibly whether you are in the right guild or not.

 

For our own guild, we prefer to experience the full spectrum of grittiness that Eorzea offers including some more mature topics like death, loss, and various other tragedies.  This isn't to say that there aren't lighthearted moments as well, but I have known some RPers that only want to be the heroes of all the stories and who always have to be saving the day and such.  Again, there is nothing wrong with this, but these types often don't fit in with us because they can be perceived as being somewhat Mary Sue.  This is the reason that a variety of different types of RP guilds exist.  Some favor that sort of always-lighthearted "cake and frosting" style RP and others want to cut right into the meat of things.

 

 

That got a little longwinded.  lol  For the rest of it though, where RL thought processes might permeate the IC/OOC divide, it happens sometimes, and the best we can do is look for some sort of IC reason/excuse for it.  I see it often when folks want to "ship" two characters, but often the reason is as simple as the character wants to see the other two characters together as well.  I sometimes go in with a sort of OOC plan of what might happen on any given evening, and often when I log out I'm left thinking, "Well that totally went a different way than I expected."  I just don't think that's a bad thing - particularly in Eva's case as she is more prone to get swept along with things than Ben who is more steadfast and set in his ways.

[Tiergan]

I think the closest I have had to what you describe is when I encounter real life scenarios and the 'Tiergan' part of my brain unhelpfully pipes up with a totally illogical suggestion because I have been in his head too much. Like "This room is leaves us too exposed. Stand with your back towards a wall to prevent getting attacked from behind and make note of all exits. Also, we can use the chair as weapons in absence of a sword."

 

Yes, Tiergan-brain, I am sure this will be plenty useful at Ihop.

[Coatleque]

...these types often don't fit in with us because they can be perceived as being somewhat Mary Sue.

 

I play Crofte as the type of person I wish I was in life, I think. At the same time, the above statement is what I worry about most. Someone smack me if I become that.

[Melodia]

I look at Ruru and I see pieces of me in him...the brattiness he exhibits at times, rash decision-making and quiet. Those are me. But then he also does things that surprise me. Once when I was stressing asking"But I don't know what to do. What is such and such happens and what about....?" And my friend stopped me and said "Do what Ruru would do." And I have learned to act more from my gut instinct with him. I do the initial thing that pops into my head. Last night in rp, Ruru was being a little ass to someone and ICly had to be hushed by Zhavi because the instinct felt right to be tough on this woman we were talking to.

 

But outside of the game I ponder ideas and such, but I don't really stress about it. I have fun trying to imagine how his story will play out and such in my head but I don't find myself overhwelmed. I enjoy it. And I don't bring Ruru problems to my world. LOL....but vice versa I think RL issues hurt the rp at times. I'm guilty of it. "I'm sad because of 'X' therefore rp is cancelled or Ruru doesn't want to talk to anyone. Yeah....that's no good but I'm a human being and if I messed up, then sue me.   I am just honest in that my opinion is the bleed through happens more from RL to IC than the other way around.

[Warren Castille]

...these types often don't fit in with us because they can be perceived as being somewhat Mary Sue.

 

I play Crofte as the type of person I wish I was in life, I think. At the same time, the above statement is what I worry about most. Someone smack me if I become that.

 

Echoing that. This is actually the like... fiftieth version of a "Warren Castille" I've ever played and the line blurs a bit between how he'd react and how I'd react. Comes with the territory, I think.

 

Also want to clarify that I'm not like, angsting out at my computer or work or anything. Just been spending a lopsided amount of billable hours with my attention on fiction.

[Coatleque]

Just been spending a lopsided amount of billable hours with my attention on fiction.

 

If it's getting in the way of RL work, I'd have to say pull it back some.

I'm lucky in that my work is sporadic enough that I can read forums in-between tickets.

[Berrod Armstrong]

...these types often don't fit in with us because they can be perceived as being somewhat Mary Sue.

 

I play Crofte as the type of person I wish I was in life, I think.  At the same time, the above statement is what I worry about most.  Someone smack me if I become that.

 

Echoing that. This is actually the like... fiftieth version of a "Warren Castille" I've ever played and the line blurs a bit between how he'd react and how I'd react. Comes with the territory, I think.

 

Also want to clarify that I'm not like, angsting out at my computer or work or anything. Just been spending a lopsided amount of billable hours with my attention on fiction.

Sounds like you're engaged in your plot more than anything else! It's good as long as the play continues to be fun!

[Kage]

Yes, Tiergan-brain, I am sure this will be plenty useful at Ihop.

Hey, you gotta defend them pancakes!

[Dogberry]

With Dogberry, not so much. He's in a serious situation and I hope I never have to go through a double leg amputation, but it doesn't bum me out.

 

However, there have been a couple of instances where I've had "bleed-through". For some background, I grew up in a very strict religion that put an emphasis on isolating ourselves from non-believers and that we would survive a literal apocalypse. I don't want to go into details about what happened during my time with them, but I should also add that they practice a very strict shunning policy for anyone who leaves. When I left they went after me pretty hard.

 

So one day a friend of mine starts a Changeling: The Lost game. If you haven't heard of Changeling: The Lost, it's a game where you play a person who has been abducted by fairies, been turned into whatever they chose to make you according to their whim, and live at their mercy for an undisclosed amount of time, and then managed to escape after leaving a piece of your soul behind. I read through the book, and it basically read like a road map to my damage. I soldiered on, not wanting to let my friend down, and trying to convince myself that maybe expressing myself this way will be cathartic. It wasn't. I had to leave the game before I had a meltdown.

 

The second one was due to he immersive nature of LARPing. I play in a post-apocalyptic game called Dystopia Rising, and at my second event, almost right out of the gate, I started having a panic attack. Wandering up to the camp, seeing the shanty town they made reminded me of how I was told we'd be living at first in the "new system." By the time I reached the camp, and people noticed me, I was shaking visably, almost about to break down into tears. I surrendered my weapons, asked for shelter, and they brought me in and gave me some hot chocolate. I'm pretty sure they thought it was all in-character. I just tried to keep a lid on it, and their kindness kept me from spilling over. DR folk are amazing.

[Warren Castille]

Oh, it isn't interfering with my work. Hrm, I'm not representing my thoughts very well here.

 

This isn't even really a problem I've been having, I just wanted to get some insight as to what other people thought on it. My job is easy enough that I'm not losing performance despite my head being in the clouds, so no harm no foul.

 

Edit: Emphasis on "problem." It's happening but it isn't troubling. More of a "And how do they get out of THIS pickle?" fade-to-commercial type stuff.

[Coatleque]

Well... when my head's in the clouds I deflect with humor.

 

I think Warren just needs to learn some good pickup lines.

[Warren Castille]

Anything that refers to "the D" makes me laugh. I am the most mature.

 

Edit: Why, Lady Crofte, are you implying that Warren isn't equipped to battle for someone's heart without cavalry? No wonder people whisper behind our backs.

[Jancis]

Aww his oblivious and polite manner is what makes Warren such a catch!

 

Seriously though I do care a lot about my characters as well. I love them terribly and sometimes it is difficult to reign in and focus on how their suffering and loss is really a joy at times.

 

I do find some of my own frustration bleeding across the screen time to time and then, bam, Jancis is acting uncharacteristically. I even wrote that once in the role play that she acted differently and lashed out at someone because I was beyond knowing what the hell else to do. Lashed out with water. Knocked the guy on his ass. Yes, Alveo. :lol:

 

Now she role plays it with serious guilt if it's ever brought up.

 

The wiki helps and I have my own notepad of "if this; then that" to help me kind of stay in tune. Still sometimes I have to step back and "un-attach" myself from the character. It's like a good movie; just get drawn into it all.

 

Immersion! Magic! Aaahhh!

[Unnamed Mercenary]

I'm half expecting that as soon as I pop in game and am IC for Kage...some friends and acquaintances are going to throw a wonderful wrench into Kage's  plans and knock him out.

 

But that did happen. >_> <_>_>

 

On-topic, when I craft a character's story, there are certain...aspects of myself I'll use for them. That isn't to say the characters thought process or decisions would be ones I'd do as a person, but there is a certain rationality that I developer for the characters. It's fun to get into the mindset of another person, and play out how the life choices of the character influence decisions. It's also why I have to stop and think to get IC every now and then. I'll find myself saying "how would ____ react in this situation" a lot.

[Oscare]

I have to agree with the majority, I'm always thinking about my character's stories and interactions... and my mind wonders to alternatives in different kinds.

 

Such as, "what if Oscare said 'this' instead of 'that'," or "if he didn't do that, would 'X' be in a lot more trouble? Or would they be in a better situation?". These are the types of things I like to wonder about that because they can make for great scenes or writes or whatever!

 

My mind also likes to think of "What if World of Warcraft-Oscare was part of that scenes?", since you know, FFXIV-Oscare is like my nine-millionth incarnation of him. Those two are vastly different in personality and resources, which feeds my wanna-b ~~IMAGINATIVE~~ mind.

 

Simply put, my plots and interactions are always in the back of my mind. xP Especially with all you super wonderful RPers, you guys are plague, I tell you.

[Jancis]

My mind also likes to think of "What if World of Warcraft-Oscare was part of that scenes?", since you know, FFXIV-Oscare is like my nine-millionth incarnation of him. Those two are vastly different in personality and resources, which feeds my wanna-b ~~IMAGINATIVE~~ mind.

 

Oh Gods I do that all the time! Blending characters is tough.

 

My WoW character would be so furious at the nonsense Jancis puts up with and the weakness of so many people around her and would refuse to cry. I've spent years with her and so getting out of her mindset is tough; it's muscle memory for character reactions and they're all wrong! Poor Jancis!

 

I think especially starting out in role play it helps to have a character that is alike to you, or reflects the "rose-hued glasses" of yourself or whatever you want to aspire to be more like. It's easier and more fulfilling at points. Tougher role players who like the challenge go out of their comfort zone and try something off the wall. I could never get the hang of that.

[Val]

...these types often don't fit in with us because they can be perceived as being somewhat Mary Sue.

 

I play Crofte as the type of person I wish I was in life, I think.  At the same time, the above statement is what I worry about most.  Someone smack me if I become that.

 

Echoing that. This is actually the like... fiftieth version of a "Warren Castille" I've ever played and the line blurs a bit between how he'd react and how I'd react. Comes with the territory, I think.

 

Also want to clarify that I'm not like, angsting out at my computer or work or anything. Just been spending a lopsided amount of billable hours with my attention on fiction.

Sounds like you're engaged in your plot more than anything else! It's good as long as the play continues to be fun!

 

I have to agree with what Berrod said! I think it's okay to be caught up in the plot or engaged in such as manner as long as you're enjoying yourself, but I can certainly see how one could worry or become engaged.

 

I've based Val's personality off of multiple things. He has my sarcasm and wit, a friend's boldness, another friend's brashness, and thrown in with some highly illogical fears, needs, and a nice dash of ignorance. This can throw him into some pretty hilarious situations and Val can be downright offensive. I often worry that people will either be annoyed by the character because of this (because he's meant to be humorous more than anything), or take his thoughts/views/whatever and assume they're mine.

 

Early on, I would apologize to people before or after we RPed on Val's behalf so that they wouldn't continue to think this. Now I just sort of do the RP and hope people enjoy the character and try not to worry about it =)

[Warren Castille]

 

Early on, I would apologize to people before or after we RPed on Val's behalf so that they wouldn't continue to think this. Now I just sort of do the RP and hope people enjoy the character and try not to worry about it =)

 

I've had to apologize after several RPs because of things going downright catastrophically and the other party being distraught.

 

Don't break hearts, folks. Makes you feel like an asshole regardless of the context.

[Val]

 

Early on, I would apologize to people before or after we RPed on Val's behalf so that they wouldn't continue to think this. Now I just sort of do the RP and hope people enjoy the character and try not to worry about it =)

 

I've had to apologize after several RPs because of things going downright catastrophically and the other party being distraught.

 

Don't break hearts, folks. Makes you feel like an asshole regardless of the context.

 

I certainly try not to! Val will often go on rants in public about how much he dislikes something and often times that might be offensive for some. But.. it's the character, and I'll openly admit that he's a prick. It's what brings a certain amount of flavor to him. None of my other characters are nearly quite that offensive and, regardless, I do tend to get an ample amount of people telling me they enjoy the character =)

[Jancis]

Seconded!

 

Beyond the quick accent and slang the retorts and his priorities are a hoot!

 

I think that helps more with the stress is that you just adore the character. It's like a fun game of chess sometimes.