RP Confession Thread

[LadyRochester]

Because why not? Keep everything respectful and anonymous if you are trying to reference another person, though I encourage you don't.

 

1. Looking back at some of the first RP I engaged in, I cringe. Jesus fucking christ, I'd punch myself in the face. (And I started role playing about a year and a half ago, maybe a tad more.)

 

2. I treat characters like characters in my favorite books/shows, if a character dies, I actually suffer their loss. (No hard feelings OOC, at least not after the initial first few moments of "WHAT WHY")

 

3. I /love/ talking about characters with other roleplayers, as I mentioned before, it's like talking about my favorite characters in books and movies. The deeper the discussion gets in the character, the better. I'm like the fangirl that asks too many questions and won't shut up.

 

4. I tend to bite off more than I can chew regarding RP, I'm improving in this sense, but I have promised people rp in the past that never happened.  (I apologize if you happen to be one of these people.)

 

.... What about you?

[Aoi Fukiku]

Because why not? Keep everything respectful and anonymous if you are trying to reference another person, though I encourage you don't.

 

1. Looking back at some of the first RP I engaged in, I cringe. Jesus fucking christ, I'd punch myself in the face. (And I started role playing about a year and a half ago, maybe a tad more.)

 

2. I treat characters like characters in my favorite books/shows, if a character dies, I actually suffer their loss. (No hard feelings OOC, at least not after the initial first few moments of "WHAT WHY")

 

3. I /love/ talking about characters with other roleplayers, as I mentioned before, it's like talking about my favorite characters in books and movies. The deeper the discussion gets in the character, the better. I'm like the fangirl that asks too many questions and won't shut up.

 

4. I tend to bite off more than I can chew regarding RP, I'm improving in this sense, but I have promised people rp in the past that never happened.  (I apologize if you happen to be one of these people.)

 

.... What about you?

My word! You've touched on pretty much everything I would have. The only thing I would add is....

 

I am a complete ass to my characters. A cruel god if you will. I love to see nothing go their way. I enjoy making them suffer one way or another whether it be emotional or physical pain. Not in the emo sense mind you but more in the sense of conflict.

[Spethah]

Due to point one being a rather negative subject, I'm putting it under spoiler tag so I don't ruin your pretty day. No seriously, I mean it. 

 

 

1. I am extremely distrustful of the RP community because of the near constant negative experience (Minus the FCs I've joined and a few friends I made in-game that just happen to check out the forums). No I'm not pointing at you and saying "AH YOU'RE ALL HORRIBLE" while I run around like a doomsayer proclaiming you guys to suck, but rather because of my experiences I've had to push my expectations bar so low that I actually don't feel happy about it. I've only experienced the positive side on Saturday during Grindstone (where I actually participated instead of watching for months on end)

 

 

2. I have a constant burning imagination. I could be cooking something for dinner and have a thought or a scene that I think through with my character and wonder how they would do such a thing. It can happen anywhere with anything and it's probably my main source of inspiration for RP or writing in general. 

 

3. If I'm allowed to and I know I'm not going to get glared at for it, I could talk for hours about my character and even how they would react to yours. I don't develop my character much, I give them a personality and a backstory that backs up the reasoning for that personality and attitude but I can talk sooo much about them just based off those two/three things. It's horrifying.

 

4. Despite having English has my native language, despite taking literature in Uni, I typo like a complete amateur and it's kinda given me the name Speth or Spethah which I've accepted with open arms. You'd think that someone who's works wonders with words (if given enough food) would actually be at least decent with spelling but no! My brain doesn't understand that and I can throw typos around like it's Easter.

[Kiur]

1) From Yahoo chatrooms to Starcraft 1 to World of Warcraft, my RP was very bad. I have a memory of WoW where I horrendously godmoded and two players just walked away from it. Good for them, really.

 

2) Kiur is an imported concept, a character originally from From Vampire to Death Knight on WoW, she is now an insane necromancer here on FFXIV. Much of her concept has been tweaked so don't click that link thinking that's who you'll meet.

[Coatleque]

1.) I also love to gossip about character developments with other people. It's like standing around the water cooler after seeing the season finale last night on TV. "OMG, can you believe she did that?!" But the weird thing is we were all there when it happened, and I'M THE ONE WHO MADE HER DO THAT.

 

2.) I secretly wish I was talented enough to draw scenes of silly 'what-if' scenarios that we come up with. Like what if characters X, Y, and Z were drunk at a bar?

[Melodia]

1. I have an active imagination and enjoy writing. I love a good story. And when I can, I love to put that down in print. But this leads to two problems:

 

2. I am incredibly shy, nervous in social settings, and do inexplicably worry about how I will be received by others, even when they are good friends in game. And when I rp, I worry doubly that I am not boring or that I will have writers block and fail to be able to respond without it being a "scene-ender".

 

3. I have done erp with my character. Likely too much. Even so much so that it is a character trait of Melodia. Meaning she's tainted goods, and hard for others to take seriously. Someone once told me that "She has a reputation....one that I wouldn't like to have." I won't say who said it but it was soon after my rp partner finished playing the game and my current doldrums hit. Hard to redeem the character with a reputation. Hard to not worry how people will react to you. Doubly hard to try and behave when tells fly in asking for that other kind of rp. A mess of my own making, I know....but still a problem.

 

I hope I didn't just say too much.

[Aaron]

Hmmm my rp confessions uhh.

 

1 - I do feel Aaron is one of those characters that'll annoy tf outta you with how he views life and acts but still can't help but enjoy being around him. At least OOC that was the intention. People IC might despise him but hell can't please everyone.

 

2 - The rp community could be a lot less "My past is awful and dark." For some reason I see a LOT of character in game who at one point have said "My parents are both dead" or something along that line. NOW BEFORE YOU JUDGE ME DO NOTE my problem isn't with the dark past itself, but how it's portrayed seemingly for attention or sympathy. It just irks me when someone goes around telling everyone and their mother "My parents are dead I watched them due and was tortured" etc. It's one thing to have a sad background. It's another to flaunt it for attention. 

 

That's bout it atm me thinks.

[K'nahli]

1. Looking back at some of the first RP I engaged in, I cringe. Jesus fucking christ, I'd punch myself in the face. (And I started role playing about a year and a half ago, maybe a tad more.)

 

Technically, I started my first RP a couple of years back, but since I have participated in so little - relatively speaking - I still feel quite new to it and wouldn't dare call myself "experienced" or active.

 

...though having said all that, I have, on occasion, looked or thought back to some of my RP and I just.... don't know what I was thinking. I can't believe I was willing to write such things at the time and I become really, really embarrassed when I consider the idea that maybe my RP partner.... also... remembers.... *shudders*

 

It's like an even more intense sense of self-loathing than I tend to have with my appalling attempts at screenshot edits, haha ;;;;;

 

 

 

I also have a bad habit of altering some of my characters' dynamics because, due to the the large gaps I tend to have between RP sessions, my impression upon how or what they should be like/what I want them to be like differs from before. Not grossly, but it happens all the same.

 

And finally, I don't have a real talent for writing or story creation, so just today I was thinking about how my characters seem to lack... something. My friend has these characters who always have something going on in their own head, something other people don't know or don't see at first whereas I'm not sure I have ever worked toward emulating such a thing. I kind of just give characters a story along with their own internal conflict or reason for being a certain way at best but I don't really know... I am jealous of everyone elses' ability to write and conceptualise stories so well. Just once I'd like to create a character and story that my friend can love and be interested in rather than it always being the other way around. I realise I am relying on her to provide me with entertainment value but I am not doing enough to return the favour - or so I personally believe.

[Berrod Armstrong]

I have not stopped roleplaying since 2010. Even in skype I have three scenes awaiting my reply at the moment.

 

I enjoy power fantasies -- and I enjoy breaking them down to normal men/women for the sake of having them strive for that state once more. 

 

I take longer than I'd like to get back to people, and sometimes I just wish I had everyone ever on skype.

[Leggerless]

Originally my character concept included a dark and gritty past (e.g. what Aaron said about "both parents dead"). Thankfully, after a few months of actually RPing it out, I realized it wasn't the type of character I enjoy playing so I rewrote parts of my background story to... seem more cheerful.

 

Still a criminal character, of course, but nowhere near as gritty and more fun to RP as.

[Siha]

I also have a bad habit of altering some of my characters' dynamics because, due to the the large gaps I tend to have between RP sessions, my impression upon how or what they should be like/what I want them to be like differs from before. Not grossly, but it happens all the same.

 

And finally, I don't have a real talent for writing or story creation, so just today I was thinking about how my characters seem to lack... something. My friend has these characters who always have something going on in their own head, something other people don't know or don't see at first whereas I'm not sure I have ever worked toward emulating such a thing. I kind of just give characters a story along with their own internal conflict or reason for being a certain way at best but I don't really know... I am jealous of everyone elses' ability to write and conceptualise stories so well. Just once I'd like to create a character and story that my friend can love and be interested in rather than it always being the other way around. I realise I am relying on her to provide me with entertainment value but I am not doing enough to return the favour - or so I personally believe.

 

I'm echoing this right here because these are seriously my hardest obstacles when it comes to RPing with others. I just don't feel like I'm interesting enough with my characters. The only other thing I can think of isssss...

 

I psych myself out hardcore when it comes to anyone that I've heard a lot about, or even seen them post a lot on the forums, no matter who it is. I once randomly ran into someone in a dungeon from here, that I knew tanked but who was DPSing at the time while I tanked, and nearly had a breakdown because I was so frightened that they weren't going to like me (they were nice the whole time, even though I never said who I was. ). It happens the same way in RP. And 10/10 times you all are wonderful and really nice, I know this, but still doesn't stop me from skittering the hell away. I wish I didn't do that.

[LadyRochester]

 

 

 

My word! You've touched on pretty much everything I would have. The only thing I would add is....

 

I am a complete ass to my characters. A cruel god if you will. I love to see nothing go their way. I enjoy making them suffer one way or another whether it be emotional or physical pain. Not in the emo sense mind you but more in the sense of conflict.

 

This. So much this. 

 

 

 

Technically, I started my first RP a couple of years back, but since I have participated in so little - relatively speaking - I still feel quite new to it and wouldn't dare call myself "experienced" or active.

 

...though having said all that, I have, on occasion, looked or thought back to some of my RP and I just.... don't know what I was thinking. I can't believe I was willing to write such things at the time and I become really, really embarrassed when I consider the idea that maybe my RP partner.... also... remembers.... *shudders*

 

 

 

THANKS FOR REMINDING ME OF THAT, DAMN.... I really hope they don't... Though most probably do...

 

Please kill me.

[K'nahli]

I'm echoing this right here because these are seriously my hardest obstacles when it comes to RPing with others. I just don't feel like I'm interesting enough with my characters. The only other thing I can think of isssss...

 

I psych myself out hardcore when it comes to anyone that I've heard a lot about, or even seen them post a lot on the forums, no matter who it is. I once randomly ran into someone in a dungeon from here, that I knew tanked but who was DPSing at the time while I tanked, and nearly had a breakdown because I was so frightened that they weren't going to like me (they were nice the whole time, even though I never said who I was. ). It happens the same way in RP. And 10/10 times you all are wonderful and really nice, I know this, but still doesn't stop me from skittering the hell away. I wish I didn't do that.

 

I get nervous like that as well, haha ;  One time I shamelessly worked up the courage to ask someone(Berrod I believe) for a screenshot since he was queued for something and not RP'ing(if memory serves) and not two seconds after he kindly agreed I was basically bthinking:

 

("Why? Why are you doing this to him? Why are you wasting his time? Why are you forcing him to be kind and oblige to your stupidity when he doesn't even know who you are? Just take a screen, take a screen, apologise a million times(but quickly) and leave the man alone")

 

 

 

(_ _) ;;   I'm glad I am not alone with this kind of fail at least.

[Sylentmana]

1. I RP a lot solo, but usually limit my RP with others to short passing interactions. This is largely due to the fact that I'm terribly slow at typing and very shy.

 

2. I prefer to use the game's mechanics and rules to dictate what a character can and can't do rather that focus on telling stories. Unfortunately, this seems to clash with many players as RP seems to have evolved to encompass a more story driven play style. I'm slowly coming over to this way of RPing, though.

 

3. I've tried playing as other races but I'm always drawn back to Miqo'te. As a result I currently have a Seeker with a very Hyur name. Since I'm too cheap to pay for a name change (especially after paying to transfer her to Balmung) I've adjusted her backstory to explain her unusual name. *Update* I've finally been able to settle with her being a Xaela. I found one last Fantasia that my retainer had. Her situation is still the same with her having a very Hyur name.

 

4. I have two versions of my character: One for solo play which follows the main story with my character as the WoL, and one version for public RP with her being less "special". Her background is essentially the same regardless of version.

[Martiallais]

There are a lot of posts here that echo things I feel (+1s incoming for those posts!) but since I haven't seen this noted yet...

 

I worry that I'll be seen/judged as not a 'serious' roleplayer because I don't have a wiki, unfinished or otherwise. There are people who I know that don't post or frequent the forums even who have pages up for their characters. The truth is I have word docs with tons of info on them about my characters and just...haven't done it yet. This is partly due to nerves (there are some really AWESOME wiki pages out there) and partly because every time I go to do it, I make a mess of the formatting.

[ɴᴘᴄ]

• I prefer for roleplay to occur organically, over-world. To that point, I generally do not put in for events or story arcs as such. While I realize that this means I will generally be a tangent to the greater community, the character development just doesn't feel right otherwise.
  
• Related to the prior point: I have a very difficult time initiating roleplay, and prefer to be approached when someone else wants to interact. I think it might be a sense that I am being pushy, when I should probably just ask OOC. But then, I've broken character.
  
• I get a little perturbed when the racial make-up of the world at large doesn't match the lore. Nothing to be done about that, though.
  

[Blue]

Not quite happy confessions, but confessions nonetheless.

 

1. Though I have been RPing for over ten years now, FFXIV was my first experience of an RP server. Prior to that, my RP was always within close-knit communities of me and a handful of friends.

 

And well.... I confess that my expectations of open-world RP were a lot higher than what the truth revealed it to be. It was a nasty bitter bite to swallow during beta when I entered open world RP and found out it was nothing like I had imagined. Even worse when launch came and I realized things weren't going to change because "that was just the beta!". Oh well... sometimes I can be naive too, I guess.

 

And mind you, I'm not addressing just the RP community, but the whole open world RP system, as well as the non-RP community. In my naivety, I had imagined open world RP as something close to The Sims, except the NPCs were players. I did not expect things like people jumping on tables, or players running around the streets without IC motive to do so, and so on. It was, again, naivety on my part, an utopistic dream that was sadly shattered >_<

 

2. Not really a confession since pretty much everyone knows that at this point, but... I roll my eyes and grimace every time I stumble on someone who feels the need to share their romantic/sexual RP-related actions in /em or /s... It's like having a couple kissing next to you and you can't look away (because the chatlog is there). I don't judge the people doing it, but the action, oh I do judge the action much. Eyeroll all the way. :roll:

 

3. I purposely do not visit the house of RPers with Personal Large Mansions because the politic voice in me tells me Large houses are not for single individuals to own. Shame on me.

 

4. I never log out. Sorry lobby server.

[Aduu Avagnar]

1. I can and have judged people on the quality of there writing. Not in instances where english isnt their first language and they are trying their best, but rather where no way you look at it can what was written be a legible sentence. Imagine how is touch the sky comes to mind.

 

2. I have high expectations of people I rp with. I have invested my time and energy into making a character that works within the setting, and researching how magic etc works, so when I see someone tear that apart I tend to get frustrated and walk away.

 

3. I have an incredibly bad time keeping in touch with people. Unless I am around them a lot of he time such as in the fc. Given this I want to apologise with people I have either promised rp to and fallen through or stopped getting in touch with. I havent forgotten you, I just have issues with time management.

[13uddy]

1. Looking back at some of the first RP I engaged in, I cringe. Jesus fucking christ, I'd punch myself in the face. (And I started role playing about a year and a half ago, maybe a tad more.)

 

I feel the same about pretty much everything before 14 years ago, and a decent amount of stuff since.

 

My first online RP experience (aside from some brief visits to some AOL RP chatroom) was this really odd forum superhero RP that involved an ongoing situation akin to DC Comics "Crisis on Infinite Earths" where worlds were bleeding into each other from across various established superhero settings as well as some original creations.  Looking at some of my old posts is like watching a young child trying too hard to tell jokes, but they keep messing up the lines and skewering the joke so badly that it is funny for completely different reasons than the joke itself.

[Kaiz]

1: I often enjoy the idea of roleplay more than the reality of it.

 

2: I'm fully capable of forging massive and wild story arcs but I deliberately fill up my time with random tedium so that I don't have to and then I expect others to do it.

 

3: I often use RP to fill social gaps IRL.

[LadyRochester]

You guys will hate me for the following confessions, but here we go:

 

5. I don't judge those who ERP, I really don't, in fact, I think sometimes it's good that characters share some intimacy, since I consider sex a very real thing. HOWEVER, whenever I see people ERPing in public, in ERP alts, or, you know, in a party but standing in front of each other (basically grinding) in a public area... I am the twat who runs up to them and spams emotes. I ruin their sexy times. I am the person you all want to slap on the face. I OOCily wear stupid outfits and force my character to twerk on them. 

 

I'm so sorry. Not really.

 

6. Like I mentioned in 5, I don't judge those who erp, HOWEVER, I do silently judge those who erp as lalafells. I know in the world they are adults, and I know intimacy exists, but... I feel like the are still too child-like to be portrayed in a sexual way. This is clearly OOC bias, of course. I know rpers who have done this and I still respect them, but... I just can't wrap my head around it, I guess. It's not something I'd ever do.

 

7. I have declined rp with people based on the fact their characters look too stupid for me to take them seriously. Of course I don't tell them that, that would be awful.

[Asmodean]

Like a few other have said thinking about a random scene while at work or out on a walk is something I often do. However, most of said scenes never feel right, like it's not how my character would act or how it ends feel empty. Gets me through a rough day of work at least.

 

Other then that.... I hate myself for my wait and watch before every interacting with others. It carries over from real life in to game and can't just stop myself from doing it. I've feel like I missed a possible chance to get a new connection.

[Dravus]

- I dislike extensive planning. I've already planned out the rough direction that my character is going to go in. I don't like it when it feels like every last little detail has to be planned out in advance before I'm granted the 'honour' of interacting with someone. Role-play is a hobby that I take relatively seriously but it should not feel like a job.

 

- I've really come to be wary of a significant portion of FFXIV's LGBT community. So many bisexual and gay role-players have their character try to hit on Graeham and then get angry when they realise he's taken. Some stop role-playing with me altogether when they realise they can't get in his pants within a few hours of meeting him - and oddly enough this has yet to happen with female characters.

 

- Graeham is actually my first character that isn't morally grey. He's surprisingly a lot of fun despite my niche typically being grim and gritty soldiers/mercenaries with troubled paths.

 

- From time to time I miss WoW, or at least my characters and connections there. I spent seven years role-playing back in WoW and I do miss some of the stuff that it brought to the table, especially blood elves and their rich lore.

 

- Tavern role-play bores me. It's fine from time to time but there's so many more interesting ways to get 'slice of life' role-play without having one's character sit around in a pub and get drunk. Going on a fishing trip, or a trip to the market is much more engaging and equally easy to set up.

[Sig]

• Emotionally Taxing -- Sig is extremely bipolar and runs the emotional gamut.  I absolutely love RPing him, but it can be very emotionally taxing and disturbing at times, especially when he is in a poor or self-destructive mood.
  

• I Need to Shut Up More Often -- I have a bad habit for excessive length posting and dominating scenes.  So many good ideas flood through my head at such speeds that I find it hard to resist making large, entertaining posts.  Thankfully, I'm pretty observant of this, and can usually reign things in rather quickly.
  

• All RP Is Fun -- Sig has engaged in numerous obscenely violent combat scenes and intense ERP scenes.  He's also engaged in countless well-mannered, polite scenes, and solo-scenes involving simple things like sampling wine and carving simple wooden objects.  Variety is the spice of life, and I've yet to find a type of RP I have not enjoyed.  I find it somewhat silly how some gawk at tasteful ERP, yet proceed to lop off heads without hesitation in combat RP. 
  

 

• Too Much RP! -- I stretch myself too thin at times with RP (especially with my relatively limited play schedule), and feel bad about not being able to RP with everyone I want to RP with, ;_;.
  

• Creative Writing is Hard -- I come from a professional writing background, so finding colorful phrases or clever adjectives to describe scenes is difficult.  It's the opposite of what I do for a living, .
  

[Lilia Lia]

1.  I don't accept IC Fantasia.  Regardless of what other name you call it.  I will try to do my best to steer all my RP away from the topic.  If your race change is an integral part of your character I am likely to avoid interacting with you because I find the idea of complete race change absolutely implausible and I'm not interested in playing wide-eyed bewilderment at whatever super crazy thing you feel like making up.

 

2.  I think a "post order" takes too much spontaneity out of RP.  I think balancing attentiveness to the scene with your construction of your own posts and actions is part of good RP and it's something you should follow organically instead of setting limitations on it.  This is part of the reason I value RP with more/shorter posts as opposed to less/longer ones.

 

3.  I don't think it's necessary to describe your character doing every action that you can infer from their character sprite or the context, like standing, walking around, or even using emotes.  I think description of your character's actions should be limited to "body language" that forms part of the interaction they have, or something important that's otherwise inexpressible.

 

4.  I think people often assume that giving their characters flaws or quirks is the same thing as making them interesting.  It isn't.

 

5.  I think it's rude to expect people to wait 30 minutes for your paragraph post when you're the only para-RPer in a scene and everyone else is RPing in real-time.