Death, Killing & You

[Roen]

Roen always believed that killing someone was a vile act. That violence should always be the last resort. When she fell in love with a man who used these means for what he believed to be for the greater good, she condemned his methods and tried to turn him away from that path.

 

Only in the end, she ended up killing him.

 

It was the first time she took anyone's life, and the act shattered her core beliefs. Heartbroken and riddled with guilt, she ran away from everyone she knew. It has been almost a year since the incident, and she is still struggling with bouts of depression and doubt. Her coping mechanism has been to isolate herself and dive into mercenary work, killing beasts and monsters. Only, even monsters sometimes turn out not to be clear cut evil things.

 

I haven't mapped out exactly how she comes out in the end; I will let circumstances, stories, and interactions decide that somewhat. I have an idea, but how and if it comes about, who knows? But yes, my characters struggles with the consequences after killing one person, albeit a person she loved. While it may not all be obviously present right there on the surface, it has not been easy for her, and in my opinion, it shouldn't be.

[Spikewerks]

In Eorzea, adventurers are accustomed to monsters and foes, and with dispatching them, often lethally. We have warriors brandishing huge axes, thaumaturges slinging fire and lightning, and archers and machinists firing projectiles into all sorts of foes. Violence is a normal part of the adventurer's challenges.

 

However, Zigovali is not an adventurer.

 

Zigovali lived on Pearl Lane for many years, so violence was something he did see, though not every day, and rarely lethal. He himself has been non-violent, both by principle and by lack of means. But his recent and rapidly growing proficiency in arcanima has given him access to many new offensive spells, including his new favorite, Broil.

 

Yet until last night, he had only used Broil on practice dummies, or on sufficiently-protected opponents in tournaments. But last night, he finally used Broil on an enemy, and the resulting blast killed them. He did not realize what he had done in the heat of the moment, but once the dust had settled, it dawned on him, and sent him into shellshock.

 

Zigovali now has to deal with the crushing guilt of taking a life--something he is very unaccustomed to. He has only been skilled in wordplay and diplomacy until now; he is not at all the sort of man to be alright with killing someone personally, and he definitely lacks the mental fortitude to resist the guilt. Will he ever use magick offensively again, having taken a life? We'll have to see.

[Sounsyy]

I should start off by saying that Sounsyy is not a morally good character. She has killed for personal reasons before, and would likely do so again if she felt that was the best option. She is Ala Mhigan, raised by a warrior people who revel in bloodbaths. She was a child soldier of the Resistance and later a naval officer to a nation of pirates and brigands. That said, she does suffer from severe PTSD symptoms and her mental illness does often affect her judgement. But its still very up in the air whether she is more damaged by the horrors of war or the taking of lives.

 

The Garleans were very easy to cope. She demonizes them and strips them of all human qualities. In her mind they are as cold as the mechina they use to claim dominion of the territories. She does not stop to think if a Garlean had a family or had feelings or regrets or aspirations because the Garleans who butchered her people never once thought if her father had a family. In her mind, every Garlean deserves the fate of its subjugated peoples.

 

Garleans and certain beastmen aside, Sounsyy has also taken the lives of more-or-less innocents. In her mind, they fully deserved to die. Her cold anger guided her blade. But she does feel some remorse for her actions, even if she does not regret her past decisions. Sometimes these kills keep her up at night. Other times she reminds herself that she would not be where she is today had she not disposed of these people.

 

/shrug

Sounsyy is a repeat offender of "crime of passion." Probably doesn't help that her father was a raging pirate psychopath murderer. Idk, like father like daughter right?

[Momoka]

Lunelle is a chaotic evil character by alignment. She absolutely has killed people, and continues to do so for her own personal reasons. Shes motivated  by a zealous "never again"  motivation, my primary inspiration for her was Magneto from the xmen. People expect her to be all MUAHAHAHAHHA like the joker because of her alingment but shes far from it. But kill she does, and will continue to do, until her goals are either realized, or someone stops her.

[LiadansWhisper]

Liadan has directly killed twice. Both times, it wasn't one, or even two people. It was more than a dozen.

 

She has incredibly mixed feelings about both situations. In the first, she didn't truly understand what she was doing, but in the second she felt backed into a corner with no other way out. While she did not directly wield the blade, as it were, that ended those lives, she directed it in both instances.

 

She still hasn't sorted through the emotions surrounding the second instance.

[Kurt S.]

Killing people? Kurt's done that a lot. Kind of comes in when the leve calls for say pirate extermination. It's as simple as they deserve it for him.

 

He won't kill or even try to hurt anyone without a direct rhyme or reason to it.

 

Now for game and wildlife. That's another thing entirely. It's kill or be killed after all. That and sometimes to catch your own fresh ingredients of a specific kind of boar native to this one region or other.

 

Though of course he also grew up on his mother's stories and she WAS a pirate captain. Now she's a privateer but still.

 

Allene, on the other hand, hasn't killed a man or woman and would probably be haunted by it after the fact. For animals and beasties she makes it a point to always have an edge over and read up on them. Though her method will always be the quickest cleanest way. Not that she isn't capable of being cruel to them.

[desmond28]

I am relentless with my character on death. He has lost several loved ones to death. He himself has killed many criminals over his career and in service to the Maelstrom. This is definitely not overlooked by me. It plays a huge role in his story, who he is, why he makes the choices he does, and why even if a happy moment comes along or even a happy day, it will soon be overshadowed by the faces of those he's killed or lost to death.

 

That being said, Paul is violent and kills (if necessary) for his work, not as a murder. He operates within the law. In a social setting he is the most gentle person. He doesn't want to get involved in a dispute. It's like if you're a cook for a job, the last thing you probably want to do is cook when you get home. But for Paul, the instant a situation involves him, he can react in a split second. It's like a switch goes off and he's already plotted in his head how he will engage any hostiles.

[Darien Cadell]

I think death is to some degree a desensitized thing in a world where being old is a rarity because people die to violence more often than they don't. That and each character's background would affect how they view death and killing. A first kill could be a simple rite of passage in one family or a nightmare-inducing trauma in another.

 

For someone playing the mercenary- help the city deal with bandits, help the Grand Company deal with Garleans -type of adventurer who has willfully chosen that type of work and knows what's involved, killing another person who has been deemed "in the wrong" is probably less of a big deal than for characters who stay out of that line of work. But if a young person who's never killed anyone before chooses to do that kind of thing, if they have any empathy at all and haven't had their choices directed by their past (vengeance, hatred, whatever), I think it probably should affect them at least the first time they kill someone, however briefly, while they work out if it's something they're capable of doing regularly.

 

As for my character, she lost part of her family the usual Calamity way. That didn't get her down too much, but it did drive her to a mercenary type of lifestyle. While she would have valued most lives very highly, she probably cut her first other-person kill on Garleans in the Shroud, who to her would have been absolutely worthy of any death she could have handed them, and probably viewed killing them as no different than culling an overpopulation of morbols.

 

When she was later forced into a situation where she had to kill people she knew and loved to make it out alive, she went off the rails and lost all sense of value in life, including her own. She worked as a straight up assassin, killing any target for the right price, because she was good at it and every kill seemed to keep her alive.

 

She came out the other side of that and has regained her sense of "every life has value," but not entirely intact and undamaged mentally. She still does mercenary work, but is much more careful about which jobs she takes, avoiding murder entirely and probably only accepting kill-type jobs if rescue is involved. So she's been dramatically affected by her life as a "killer," but not at all in the same way as, say, I would be.

[FallenFedora]

I find death, stress and the act of killing another areoften overlooked in writing and roleplaying in general, especially the long-term effects it can have on the mind. Killing in particular.

 

I feel that we are somewhat desensitised to killing as roleplayers due to the medium most of us here use, where it is indeed a game which rewards us for killing mindless AI over and over, however should Hydaelyn be a living, breathing world as seen through the eyes of our characters, things would be much different when mindless NPC becomes a living person with their own needs, goals and fears.

 

Killing another being is a hell of a thing, even in a worldwhere death is commonplace. Using now not-so-random NPC as an example in death, our characters take away all they ever were and ever will be, often seeing the looks on their faces and in their eyes whilst doing so owing to the often up close and personal combat of the setting.

 

To most that is bound to have some kind of effect as veryfew people are capable of killing another being and forgetting about it the next day as if nothing ever happened, even the most justified & lawful Paladin-type.

I have to agree wholeheartedly - I cannot think of a time, in any game in which I've roleplayed - in which any single character I've interacted with over the years took a moment to reflect on the significance of the act of taking a life, or examined the consequences on the psyche. You're absolutely right - the vast majority seem to just shrug their shoulders at the prospect, war torn Eorzea or not. 

 

Unfortunately my main is an omnicidal nihilist who looks at the world with the most pragmatic of mindsets, so it isn't best expressed through him the reactions of taking a life, my alt is more suited to it, given he reacts with genuine regret and compassion well after giving the order to one of his lackeys to see someone dead, despite never once pulling the trigger himself. He forces himself to rationalize that it was for the best and to his own benefit at the end of the day, but the guilt is there, and it is swelling.

[RiniKett]

I cannot think of a time, in any game in which I've roleplayed - in which any single character I've interacted with over the years took a moment to reflect on the significance of the act of taking a life, or examined the consequences on the psyche.

 

Pfft, Rini? Duh. lol

 

But it's true, death really is overlooked, not just the trauma of killing, but the real trauma of losing people around you. Sure we have our sad backstories, but people who are willing to actually kill their character, and do it in the right manner, can almost be down right depressing. Looking back over story lines, sometimes years of roleplay just to have that person truly die, not brought back to life, can really change the way you play your character. Heck, even the ones not directly involved would feel the effects if the person was integrated into the server. For those who us who go to the Grindstone, imagine no more Judge. Not that he quit, but we actually know and our characters know that he died for X reason. Even if someone did his job people would always remember the guy on the horse that walked around yelling; he can't be replaced. Characters would really reflect on that and, in turn, look and feel more real. Life needs death, the circle of life, etc etc. It's a really interesting concept to think about.

 

I don't think this means for everyone to kill their character senselessly, but to have that option open if it seems like the best or most interesting hook, assuming you are okay with losing that character, can lead to some really interesting role play. I'm still waiting to be invited to an IC funeral. If Rini ever dies there will be a funeral! lol. And there might be some out there that I just haven't seen.

 

That's just my opinion, but it does give you something to think about. It also begs to ask, what would people remember your character for?

[LiadansWhisper]

I have to agree wholeheartedly - I cannot think of a time' date=' in any game in which I've roleplayed - in which any single character I've interacted with over the years took a moment to reflect on the significance of the act of taking a life, or examined the consequences on the psyche. You're absolutely right - the vast majority seem to just shrug their shoulders at the prospect, war torn Eorzea or not.[/quote']

 

Or, they may simply never have done the reflecting around you (or mentioned it to you OOC).

 

Sometimes characters go through things that other players have no knowledge of, because it happens when that character isn't around your character, or it's a private moment that they don't share with you. Unless you're omniscient, really all you can say is that you didn't witness a single character reflecting on the significance.

[Jana]

Sometimes characters go through things that other players have no knowledge of, because it happens when that character isn't around your character, or it's a private moment that they don't share with you.

 

I think it's a good distinction to make! Even Ridah who's coocoo for Cocoa Puffs has moments where she reflects on her actions, but I usually keep them "offscreen" because it doesn't match the scenes she's actually killing people in, nor would such a thought kick in immediately after melting someone. It's also IC for her to avoid showing weakness to her cohorts, which remorse certainly counts as to her.

[LiadansWhisper]

I think it's a good distinction to make! Even Ridah who's coocoo for Cocoa Puffs has moments where she reflects on her actions, but I usually keep them "offscreen" because it doesn't match the scenes she's actually killing people in, nor would such a thought kick in immediately after melting someone. It's also IC for her to avoid showing weakness to her cohorts, which remorse certainly counts as to her.

 

Yep. I think people forget that there is an internal story every character is going through. My character doesn't always, for instance, show visible reaction to emotionally-jarring situations. That doesn't mean she's emotionless, or that she doesn't care. She sees it as showing weakness, and she doesn't wish to appear weak (probably because she actually is physically weak!).

[Leanne]

Life is Precious. One of Leanne's sayings, as for anything.

 

Leanne's hardened about the idea of killing others, but she always preaches it as the very last solution, if all others came and went, and always taking such as a tragedy, regardless of circumstances, for the loss of life, regardless of being or individual is exactly that to her, a sad occurrence.

 

And as of late, Leanne began to grow increasingly impatient and weary of people that hold violence as their first approach, or glorifies and revels in the act of killing, losing a friendship or two over such matter.

 

But yes, indeed, sometimes, Leanne does not show much of a outward reaction besides maybe a little frown or disapproval. Not that she disregards the death, but at the same time, outside circumstances will not let her mind linger on it for too long.

 

Also it is worthy of saying, despite everything that I stated, I rarely believe any characters to be pure saints. Leanne may hold life as a very precious thing, but she also held and holds her share of grudges, sometimes down to murderous thoughts. She is a person with flaws and with the skills to kill people if she ever desires to do so, after all.

[Zanther]

Hum...good question. Since my time of making Zanther and rping (June 2015) he has not had many chances to kill someone. That said, so far he has killed, but it was a group effort against someone who used magic to transform themselves into some type of creature. In both cases, it was also a group effort, that did result in death for the person. Sadly I never gave much thought in his reaction.

 

That said, Zan would feel bad (as he doesn't like fighting unless needed and regards Rune and Grindstones as practice in case he needs to fight for real) to a degree. In his background, he was responsible for his mothers death by accident and has never forgiven himself for it (nor his father). His days (and up to today) in Limsa, he is part of the Rogues Guild and while he tries to get stuff back without killing, some blood has been lost and has a few deaths under his belt I would imagine. Viewing them as Pirates and other thieves who have probably killed innocent people, I feel he wouldn't be too torn up about it, but would still hate the fact that he had to kill someone(s) to retrieve something.

 

All in all, I'll be giving this some thought next time I do take a non-animal/viodsent life.

[FreelanceWizard]

L'yhta deeply compartmentalizes her life, and she has a nasty tendency to classify people as "good" (worthy of protection, redemption, and so on) and "evil" (dispensable and in need of elimination). This often makes her come off as quite callous, particularly when discussing it with people who don't share the same worldview ("They were evil. They were going to kill us, so I killed them first."). One has consider that she believes herself to be destined to save the world, so she's rather like a holy warrior, in her own mind. :dodgy: That she decries other "fanatics" is just one example of her hypocrisies. :roll:

 

All this worked for a while until she ran into people who started challenging this world view, from people who were "good" in her mind but worked to cross purposes and people who couldn't comprehend how she could so readily take a life but was caring and protective outside of battle. This has led her lately to reconsider her point of view and try, at least, to pursue non-violent solutions. However, as said in a popular film, "For those regarded as warriors, when engaged in combat the vanquishing of thine enemy can be the warrior's only concern." When she draws her staff to fight, the possibility of a non-violent resolution goes out the window.

[Mia Moui]

Because Mia Moui is always searching for her last remaining family, her younger sisters, she finds herself in considerable danger from sex traffikers, bandits, pirates, and even Wood Wailers.  Mia is not afraid to kill and won't hesitate if she believes it will further her agenda.  But murder can complicate things and if she's caught and found guilty, she'd almost certainly never see her sisters again.

 

She will work as a bodyguard or as security but won't take assassination jobs.  And in that role, she may need to kill.  But because of the world she lives in, death is not a stranger.  She's lost her entire extended family except for three of her younger sisters. Friends, acquaintances, and contacts have died from murder, sickness, starvation, & war.  Just look at how few older people there are in Eorzea, that's a world of death.

 

Still, she does have regrets.  She has nightmares.  She drinks too much in trying to quiet the voices, the loss.  She was hardened by her servitude to the Coeurlclaw King but she's not made of stone.  But I doubt she'd admit any of this to anyone and in RP, I might imply it but never provide the details.

 

The details are awful and I've no interest in dwelling there.

[GhostlyMaiden]

Nanagi will kill if she thinks it's for the right thing. If she truly believes that in the end, she is helping someone and protecting someone by killing another person, then she'll try do it Stroud. Valen. Will she maybe feel the regret later? Sure! But there wont be as much regret if she were to kill someone because she was manipulated into thinking that they were the "bad guy".

 

Kanako will use what resources she has and try to avoid killing if possible. The resources she uses can either be bribery, sweet talk, or letting someone try to stop X person she might have to kill. If it gets to a point where she is all out of options and she can't just talk her way out of it, then she'll do it. She'll do it in a heartbeat and ask questions later. The exception being if she thinks X person will give her some sort of leverage down the road or answers.

[Aden Dellebecque]

This is an issue I've dealt with and will continue to deal with on Aden the entire time I'm playing the character. He's coming to terms with the act, but he's very much doing so in his own way. There's little I can say about it as a blanket statement because he's still figuring out how to handle it. He doesn't want to become callous to it, but he has to learn how to handle it in a productive way. He'd always prefer to not have to kill anyone, but understands sometimes killing will be the only or best option.

 

However, he is going to make an exception for a certain someone and take great pleasure in holding them down while someone else gets the killing blow.

[Caspar]

Trained to do this from before she could properly read or speak, violence is Virara's "first language" and in much the same way as one colors all of her thoughts and interactions. The ability to take a life for reasons other than basic survival or sustenance is how Virara was trained to distinguish Spoken from non-sentient animals; to her the ability to murder, whether you elect to or not, but simply even having that choice, is what makes a human. If you were to take the opinion of certain others as fact, she was born with an inherent predisposition towards callousness and brutality, easily separating herself from her actions. This is only natural given that she was raised by a martial artist/assassin infamous in the underworld for her atrocities, and before that was a feral child with no concept of morals. 

 

However, does that mean killing has no effect on her? Absolutely not. It might be telling too much, but I personally don't believe in "natural born killers."

[Askier]

I'll be honest, the mental image of all these murderous lalafells terrifies me. :cry:

[GhostlyMaiden]

I'll be honest, the mental image of all these murderous lalafells terrifies me. :cry:

 

That was the plan! We have to be tough to make up for looking naturally adorable.

[Virella]

I'll be honest, the mental image of all these murderous lalafells terrifies me. :cry:

 

That was the plan! We have to be tough to make up for looking naturally adorable.

99.9999% of my villains are lalafells

[Caspar]

I'll be honest, the mental image of all these murderous lalafells terrifies me. :cry:

I'm sure we're all just gathered in one place.

 

It's fun to play with people's expectations, but it's more common than I thought. 

People just love taking something cute and twisting it into something evil, lol.