Joining & leaving RP FC questions

[Aris]

Hello!

 

When choosing a FC it's not a decision I take lightly, usually doing lots of research before applying in hopes it'll be the right fit. But sometimes, for all sorts of reasons, things don't always work out.

 

In PvE companies leaving usually isn't a problem, however I'm wondering how it works with RP companies, and any implications ICly? If someone was to join for a few weeks, find it didn't fit them OOC and leave, is it awkward IC to do so?

 

Is it best not to get too involved IC while still settling in?

 

Am I thinking too much again?

 

Thanks for any advice!

[Unnamed Mercenary]

As someone who actively avoids RP/IC FCs (and atm, all FCs), let me just say "it depends".

 

It depends on how that FC is run.

It depends on the leaders/officers and members of that FC.

It depends on how you feel about the FC before,during, [and potentially after] your stay in it.

 

Some questions to ask yourself before joining a FC (or really any group):

 

1. Do your views on RP match up with theirs?
   
2. Do you get along with the members/officers/leaders on at least an OOC basis?
   
3. Do you have respect for those people?
   
4. Do those people have respect for you and/or the people you associate with?
   

[Syf]

It really depends on the FC and how they want to introduce people. Some RP FCs will require an IC review or interview, and you'll be invited based on those principles. Some FCs will want you to fit in as a person and will work to incorporate your character afterwards. It's best to contact somebody in the group to figure out exactly how their recruiting process goes, and tell them your own preferences for how you want to handle things.

 

Leaving is completely different, and will depend on whether you depart with the FC on good terms or bad, how quickly or slowly it happens. If you don't find the FC fun, or don't find your character fits in IC, then try and leave on good terms. If you wish to roleplay a scene out where the character leaves, let somebody know. Both leaving and joining are based on clear channels of communication, though it's not always so simple.

[Nebbs]

Dear Aris,

 

Yes you may be thinking too much, try warm milk instead of coffee.

 

Now, regarding an RP FC. Some will have trial periods etc.. but essentially if it is a mutually agreed leaving there is no reason it can not be managed with IC continuity.

 

The problem comes when it is not mutual. Either the player leaves with no word or the player if kicked from the FC. In these situations I expect that each side makes up what happened and claims it as truth. This is much like real life, where we start to believe our own false justifications for things. So really there is no problem.

 

There is just one problem area I can see, and that is where one side asserts something over the other. Such as the FC claim to have chopped off your arm and have it in a case, or the player says he burnt down the house. Here we are in the realms of god modding on things outside of your control. 

 

So my advice, keep it simple, keep it plausible and only define what you control.

 

Wishing you happy RPs and much lewt

[Warren Castille]

Leaving ICly over OOC differences is as awkward as it sounds. Does the character have a motive to leave? If not, it can be a challenge to suddenly justify uprooting and looking elsewhere. Depending on who your FC used to be, it can either be no issue or a big deal. Most upstanding people will understand the rift and gloss things over, either by not bringing it up or being vague, i.e. "Used to work with Aris. Didn't work out. Don't wanna talk about it." This keeps things neutral while not retconning the incident.

[Aaron]

Just give a preemptive alert that you might leave an FC if it doesnt suit you before they let you join.

 

My boss tells everyone that explaining both the positive and negative routes before you even begin beats not saying anything and eventually going the negative route (in your case leaving)

[Arik]

Like others have said, I really think it depends on the FC and the people within it. In the past, I've talked about leaving a RP guild with its members and then simply left-- neither party really needing to specify -why- I left, just that I did. We'd stay on good terms, still rp with each other, I just wouldn't share the guild tag anymore. Either way though, I do think it's always best to discuss it with at least the officers prior to departing or else you risk hard feelings. 

 

In our FC, we do require an IC meeting prior to joining, but we don't really set it up at all like the character is being interviewed (unless that's what the applicant actually wants.) Otherwise, we just arrange to stumble onto each other and play around to see how they fit in. After a bit, we'll find a way to shift conversation to the Company and if the character has been a good fit and expresses interest IC, we'll go ahead and do the invite.

 

Either way, we function relatively loosely compared to some FCs, mostly because we're not a very elaborately structured group. We're mostly just a bunch of miscreant adventurers that figured out teaming up would allow them to take higher paying jobs. As a result, membership is pretty fluid, and people could easily come or go as they pleased. But there are definitely other groups that are far more formally structured where that might not work-- and so it's just best to go ahead and talk things out with folks first to see how they'd like to handle the departure.

[Branson Thorne]

Do it my way "Hey this isn't really working out, nothing personal, just not to my taste. Good Luck and peace out!

 

If they find problem with that.....well sucks for them.

[Virella]

Sometimes don't work out IC, sometimes they don't work OOC. Personally I would just try to leave on good terms I was in a FC before were I genuinely liked the people in, however playtimes were hit and miss due to timezones difference. I sometimes still roleplay with some of them, so it really doesn't have to be 'burn all bridges' scenario!

[LiadansWhisper]

I'll put it to you this way - it's different with every FC.

 

Just like you'll run into some PvE FCs who take it very personally when you decide to leave, you'll run into some RP FCs that take it very personally when you decide to leave - whether it's do to IC things or OOC things.

 

So do your best to maintain good relations with your previous FC if that is possible, but don't be surprised if it's not, and don't take it to heart.  You have to do what's best for you in real life, not what's best for your character in magical pretendy-fun times time.

[Aris]

Just to clarify, I'm not thinking of going in and causing drama!

 

Wondering more along the lines of - joining a FC that was said to be slur free, and realise a couple of weeks in that it isn't and that won't be changing, or that our timezones don't match up.

 

Okay, so, lots of communication, ask beforehand how joining and leaving is handled. Maybe join a FC LS first if there option is there. Keep things positive. Finish up any big RP commitments before leaving? Stay away from caffeine.

 

Thanks everyone so far! This is very helpful.

[LiadansWhisper]

Just to clarify, I'm not thinking of going in and causing drama!

 

Wondering more along the lines of - joining a FC that was said to be slur free, and realise a couple of weeks in that it isn't and that won't be changing, or that our timezones don't match up.

 

Okay, so, lots of communication, ask beforehand how joining and leaving is handled. Maybe join a FC LS first if there option is there. Keep things positive. Finish up any big RP commitments before leaving? Stay away from caffeine.

 

Thanks everyone so far! This is very helpful.

 

I didn't think you were.  Sometimes drama just happens, and sometimes people take a simple situation and make it dramatic.  Here's hoping that doesn't happen to you.

[Lydia Lightfoot]

It becomes very awkward, very quickly, to come up with IC reasons for an OOC split from an IC FC if said FC had any kind of ongoing story whatsoever (particularly if your character had become invested in said story). I've personally witnessed in other games numerous situations in which a player chose to remain in a guild which made them unhappy because they couldn't justify the IC of leaving... sometimes for months, or even years. 

 

In some cases it can cause the abandonment of a character, because rather than trying to resolve the issue and move on with the character, the player instead ends up making a new alt due to the belief that the main character's story is so wrapped up in the guild's story that they can't leave without it ruining the character. Or, they kill the character off, either of which gets the same general result - they aren't playing the character that they had spent so much time working on.

 

Unfortunately, I don't really have an answer to either problem. I just know they happen. S'why my FC, in spite of being for the purpose of RP, isn't an IC one. If someone decides they want to remove their character and migrate them to another FC, well, it's unfortunate, and of course we hope it won't be the last we see of them, but it doesn't ruin their character if they do so.

[C'kayah Polaali]

Most good RP FCs I've seen like it when people start RPing with them on the periphery, and have a way to gently draw you in, so you can try it out before you commit. A lot of them have RP linkshells for allies, so you can RP with them via that mechanism, or you can join the FC from an OOC point of view and only get involved in the deeper RP stories as you both are comfortable.

 

Any RP FC that insists that you commit before you're sure is probably one you want to avoid.

[FreelanceWizard]

Having been on both sides of the aisle on this one, I can definitely say that communication is key. It's very irksome as an FC leader or officer to see someone up and leave without a word -- if some member is being a jerk to you, for instance, the leadership of the FC generally wants to know about that! A simple tell of, "Hey, this isn't working out for me" is all it takes. It's also possible the leadership can address whatever problem you're having, too. If people are using slurs in a chat and that's against the rules, the leadership surely wants to know that so they can put a stop to it.

 

If your character's involved in the plots of the group, most leaders will be willing to help you write them back out -- or maybe you can stay involved, just as a non-member. Every group differs in how well that works; a strict military organization, for instance, probably doesn't have room for non-members in its stories, while a casual society of adventurers might well have a whole list of friends they call on for their plots.

 

If you're not sure things are going to work out, I would start before joining by approaching the leadership and explaining your concerns, rather than going through whatever app process there is and potentially leaving later. Most groups are going to be perfectly fine with setting up some RP and seeing how things play out. By way of example, right now Mysterium has two apps "on hold" while we and the applicants see how the RP goes with the characters in question. They might be resolved by the characters joining fully, just ending up as Dear Friends with the IC linkpearl, or perhaps even going their separate ways. This isn't even remotely abnormal for us; we have no problem "RPing someone in" over time -- no app required. If you're concerned about OOC issues, many groups have an LS for their friends and allies where you can get to know people first.

 

So, the long and short of it is, communication with the group's leadership from the get-go is key. If the leaders don't want to talk to you, or you don't feel they're addressing your concerns, you can always walk away.

[Kittycat88]

I say ask before joining. Most fc I've seen have established ways to deal with such things. Just ask how they deal icly with chars of people who left because they didn't click oocly.

[Shoshopu]

Do talk to the officers before you leave to let them know why, if you'd like, but other than that I don't think you have any other obligations, social or actual. And it's in your right to completely retcon your time there and write something else to go there instead, as well, if you want- doesn't even depend on the severity of whatever reason you had for leaving, it's your character and you don't have to carry around every FC they've been in if you don't want to. Unless the FC is really, really big, or you RP with people who are friends of the FC but not in the FC, chances are their remained inclusion of your character in their story-thus-far, if they choose to do that, won't bleed into or interfere with other RP you find in the future.

 

I speak a little from experience here. I've retconned a character's existence in a guild before from her current and backstory and it ended up not affecting much, if any of my RP afterwards. I retconned for personal reasons related to the circumstances behind my leaving in the first place. What was removed ended up only being a small would-have-been chapter of her story, anyway, as I continued to RP with her with better groups. The one or two people who remembered my character's time with the first group were completely understanding of the retcon and went with her new story.

 

My example of my personal leaving of an RP group is more extreme, so for another example, people leave my FC occasionally if they're just not a good fit, or if they don't have time for the game anymore, or if they have found another group they'd rather RP with, and that's fine and dandy. They say their goodbyes and head on their way and there's no drama. I'm not sure all FCs are as chill but I'd be willing to bet most of them are.

 

It's your character, your time and your money to do what you want with, but good on you for wanting to leave in the least disruptive way possible! Here I suggest the less is more approach. Just be polite as you leave and move on.

[X'zirashah Bakt]

You have received an abundance of excellent advice that I won't reiterate. However, I did want you to know that you are not alone. I am very picky myself and like to see FC role-players "in action" even before I go through the application process to see if their role-play style meshes well with mine. Thus far that has worked very well for me, despite the fact I tend to run as a lone wolf and very independent most of the time. 

 

Trust me, you are fine. I'm fairly picky: non-good aligned, no "worship me" FC leader characters, and a certain high standard quality of role-play. If you ever feel like you're not doing great or too picky, just think of me!

[industrythirteen]

To me, OOC and real life always come first. Hands down. RP is a collaborative effort out-of-character before it is in-character, and requires working with other players to entertain one another. First and foremost, the player in question, usually, is our friend, or soon will be, and we should make every effort to include them, to work with them, to meet them halfway if there is ever a character or roleplay-based storytelling issue. It is still an out-of-character issue that should first be addressed. I personally think that a solid OOC foundation makes for a much better RP experience. 

 

That said, sometimes there just isn't a good fit between new member and FC, and that's okay. I personally don't subscribe to the idea of absolute guild loyalty. I think people know what is best for them, and they should trust themselves to make the right decisions for them. It really is okay to just say 'this isn't working for me, thank you, but no thank you,' and leave on good terms. It is also nice to give the FC leadership a heads up as to something that might be an on-going problem. While that may require an uncomfortable exit interview conversation, no one is under any obligation to have that conversation. For me at least, as a co-leader of an FC, I'd at least like to know what I could have done better. 

 

What I don't necessarily think is an ideal approach is to isolate or hold back during the initial trial-run of joining the FC. I think new members should be as active as possible, and established members too should help those new members adjust. That trial period is just as much, if not more, for the new member to figure out if the FC will work for them, as it is for the leadership to assess whether the new member is a good fit for the FC.

[Dis]

I think that all of the complications behind leaving a RP FC (or guild in any game, really), is why the FC that my husband I run is currently set up like a mercenary company.  If there's an OOC reason for you to leave like going to help friends, finding a group that you fit better with on an IC and OOC level, it's as easy as literally 'I've found other options that I want to pursue'.  Your character easily detaches from the company, and you can move on pretty seamlessly. 

 

I've left guilds for a lot of different reasons, some IC, some OOC, across multiple MMO's.  A lot of the time as long as you make sure that the departure is friendly, it doesn't seem to be a huge deal.  Being friendly is as simple as letting the leadership know that you want to move yourself and your character in another direction.  I've had to stretch to find IC reasons to leave, but I've never had to abandon a character to get away from that guild. 

 

Even with my character tangled very far into the plot, I've always been able to find a logical reason to detach myself from that group.  It all depends on what's going on.  I think, like with anything else, communication with the guild/FC leadership is very important in a clean and simple break.  Hard feelings make this more difficult, obviously, but it's still possible.

[Masaki Moui]

To me, OOC and real life always come first. Hands down. RP is a collaborative effort out-of-character before it is in-character, and requires working with other players to entertain one another. First and foremost, the player in question, usually, is our friend, or soon will be, and we should make every effort to include them, to work with them, to meet them halfway if there is ever a character or roleplay-based storytelling issue. It is still an out-of-character issue that should first be addressed. I personally think that a solid OOC foundation makes for a much better RP experience.

 

This is written better than I could express it and it's just the way I look at RP and the OOC communication and trust factor involved. With this in mind, I like to communicate with the FC or FC leaders if I can and leave on good terms. If I try my best to communicate my intentions and come to an understanding then I have a clean conscience.