If you can't be nice to people outside the RPC, you don't belong on the RPC.

[OttoVann]

Nice title I know. Thanks for opening the thread.

 

And by the way, I mean blogs, aka tumblr.

 

We all talk shit about a lot of people privately all the time, I know I do in private skype groups. This ridiculous stuff where you act one way on the RPC, then go on tumblr and act like a wild savage animal with no manners or sense of decency is lame.

 

Seriously, if you want to act like a public asshole on tumblr, just don't come here anymore. This isn't specific to anyone, so let's not play games.

 

If you can't be nice on tumblr, why should you pretend to be nice on the RPC? If you can't be nice about people who use the RPC on tumblr, why should you be on the RPC? In fact a lot of tumblr-centric people ruthlessly shit all over the RPC, and damn I'll be honest I gripe about the RPC from time to time too, maybe too much. However, I don't go on a public blog and go fullblast and then come here like its no big deal.

 

A lot of people, I guess rightfully so, bitch and moan about cyber-bullying and witchhunts, and then get on their tumblr and do just that. Check yourselves or just leave. Damn.

 

Oh yeah, if you are a complete animal on tumblr, people here should shun you like the hateful person you are. People in game should too. Maybe that would correct a lot of non-sense.

[Unnamed Mercenary]

*claps* Agreed, although I don't think tumblr is the only place that happens.

 

When did people start thinking it was acceptable to act in such a way? (Especially on something public like the internet).

[Michikyou]

Nice title I know.  Thanks for opening the thread.

 

And by the way, I mean blogs, aka tumblr.

 

We all talk shit about a lot of people privately all the time, I know I do in private skype groups.  This ridiculous stuff where you act one way on the RPC, then go on tumblr and act like a wild savage animal with no manners or sense of decency is lame.

 

Seriously, if you want to act like a public asshole on tumblr, just don't come here anymore.  This isn't specific to anyone, so let's not play games.  

 

If you can't be nice on tumblr, why should you pretend to be nice on the RPC?  If you can't be nice about people who use the RPC on tumblr, why should you be on the RPC?  In fact a lot of tumblr-centric people ruthlessly shit all over the RPC, and damn I'll be honest I gripe about the RPC from time to time too, maybe too much.  However, I don't go on a public blog and go fullblast and then come here like its no big deal.

 

A lot of people, I guess rightfully so, bitch and moan about cyber-bullying and witchhunts, and then get on their tumblr and do just that.  Check yourselves or just leave.  Damn.

 

Oh yeah, if you are a complete animal on tumblr, people here should shun you like the hateful person you are.  People in game should too.  Maybe that would correct a lot of non-sense.

 

 

I don't think I could of said it better myself. Thank you.

[Dravus]

It's a pretty dangerous thing to do. Especially when it involves influential players badmouthing someone on their blog who isn't there to defend themselves. Chances are they'll have a handful of followers - or in some cases a load of followers - who will then become biased towards whoever is the subject of rumours.

 

As a rule of thumb I'm not afraid to cut off all contact with any role-player who spends their free time badmouthing other players behind their backs. This isn't high school. It's also why I don't bother with Tumblr - especially given how readily many of its users are to completely freak out if anybody holds a different opinion to them on a particular subject.

[Michikyou]

Personally, I like to call Tumblr the Neverland for teenagers who cant grow up.

People drag on arguments and drag on negativity there as if it matters. Then in turn make people feel terrible for not agreeing.

[ShoggMommy]

*claps* Agreed, although I don't think tumblr is the only place that happens.

 

When did people start thinking it was acceptable to act in such a way? (Especially on something public like the internet).

 

Because it's easier to be anon on these sites, it's easier to just say 'fuck others'. For some reason tumblr is heavily known for this. I'm not sure when it changed to that I remember when it was like MySpace and was mostly blogging. However you are right, it's not just tumblr. But I think tumblr is just so easy to be anon a bit more than say facebook.

[Afghan Vet 2009]

Well said! I am glad someone had the courage to finally publicly say something about this toxic behavior that seems to keep occurring. 

Way to go Otto! You got my thumbs up for this!

[Nebbs]

I don't expect everyone to agree or get along, that seems to be human nature. People should be able to raise concerns and problems in a constructive way.

Privately do what you want, but publicly attacking someone or even the community is not great. We all say a few things when we a hurt, and they generally pass quickly.

 

However, regardless of the intent, if you want to be seen as vitriolic or a bully go ahead. At least then it is clear to all.

[Sailor July]

I love Tumblr with a passion, so I feel so sad when I see people knock Tumblr down like it's a horrible place. I know amazing, open-minded and supportive people on there.

 

However, there are people on Tumblr, who are horrible. I treat my Tumblr like it's my little place on the web. I talk about what I like and don't like. Some people are against my hobbies and beliefs, and that's okay - I'm not there for them. If someone is targeted because they're speaking their minds, on their personal place, I feel like that is a form of bullying on its own.

 

What you're talking about, though, sounds like people who name and shame and or act vile towards certain people, a group or the community as a whole and I think that is wrong. There's rightful free speech, and then there's being an asshole. 

 

I can't say who does or does not belong here, but if they dislike the people and or community so much, than there's no real point to stay. It's toxic for them, and for people they may hurt and I say that as someone who has been on the end of having toxic friends and being a toxic friend because of mental disabilities.

[g0ne]

I do not know what happened, but what's with all the negativity recently? 

 

Why can't we all just SMILE and hug and be happy and get along well, despite differences. People have differences, even twins aren't the exact same, but that doesn't mean you can't get along. :<

[Clover]

I use Tumblr on a daily basis, and I must say that I never notice any drama. Granted, I can't check every single entry from the FFXIV tag, but still, I don't understand where the idea that Tumblr is a dramafest for immature people came from (?_?)

Most of the things I see are people posting screenshots and having fun.

 

As for this case in particular, I can't comment because I don't know what it's about.

[TheLastCandle]

Seems like something that would be better served by a PM to the person or people you're addressing rather than inciting drama and further validating many people's opinions regarding the community here. Because that's exactly what this thread is going to accomplish.

[industrythirteen]

So, Imma say screw it to my own advice, just once, I think. I have posted on tumblr, about some issues that have cropped up on the RPC. I haven't said anything about anyone, or lambasted anyone personally, or any particular groups. I've merely taken the topic at hand, and run with it, sharing my thoughts on things like introversion and roleplay, responsibility for roleplay and decisions. Why didn't I post here, instead? I had too much to say. Way too much for what I consider to be an appropriate-length forum post. If I'm gonna wall of text, I don't really want to do it here, if I can help it. Also, maybe I felt a little safer because, it is my tumblr. So, there is that, too—I'm a little full of shit, at least a little bit. I enjoy a little gossip here and there, but I am mostly interested in putting my ideas out there.

 

But, do not get into a blame storm. Do not do the blame storm. For as terrible as tumblr can be, it's also a really great place, too, with lots of creativity and art and beauty, design and inspiration. I think of it as like, a microcosm, or a little biopsy that is the entirety of the internet condensed into one very small place. So, the best and the worst (blame storms included) is often highlighted. I love tumblr, and I get a little squinty side-eyed when people shit all over it, as if it's tumblr's fault somehow. Nope. It's just people being people. We're all people, with different temperaments. People can be really awesome, but they can be kinda crap, too.

 

[Vali]

Seems like something that would be better served by a PM to the person or people you're addressing rather than inciting drama and further validating many people's opinions regarding the community here. Because that's exactly what this thread is going to accomplish.

 

Well said

[Gone.]

We have people that can't even manage this on the RPC itself. That some are abusive over on Tumblr really doesn't come as a surprise for me whatsoever.

[Dravus]

Seems like something that would be better served by a PM to the person or people you're addressing rather than inciting drama and further validating many people's opinions regarding the community here. Because that's exactly what this thread is going to accomplish.

 

Usually I'd agree but I feel like this is something that needs to be highlighted. More people need to be aware that what they post online can and will haunt them in the future. Otto isn't naming and shaming either so it's not like he's calling out individuals directly.

[Maril]

Every place has it's share of people with questionable ways of dealing with things. I noticed this trend of directly/indirectly addressing what appears to be mostly private dramatic situations quite a while ago, it even seemed to go on when everyone agreed that the tone here was too harsh. I don't particularly like seeing it, but I doubt people will ever stop doing it - don't mistake this for a defense of the behavior. I tend to note who's doing it when I see it and honestly, without deeper know into the situations, it just them in a bad light. I tend to avoid rping with people that go dramatic in public because I don't want to end up as the victim for a misguided hate-campaign - even if someone has done something bad, I don't think that's a proper way to deal with it. I don't think I'm alone in avoiding/being careful around people with this kind of behavior, and considering we're all here to find RP it all seems very like a very detrimental thing to do.

 

Personally, I use tumblr as a place to post screenshots of my adventures in xiv and in minecraft (playing a bunch of that whilst waiting on heavensward), and then I really like those question me-me's (I think that's what theyre called), I think they're quite fun even though I rarely get asked. I follow a number of blogs belonging to roleplayers in the community who use it for the same.

So there are good people on tumblr as well, and I'd encourage anyone to make a blog for these purposes - could drown out some of the negative ^^ (If you have a blog like this lemme know, I will follow you and like your things )

 

One thing will always be true though, if you talk shit about other people it's always going to come back and bite yourself in the behiney. It doesn't matter how anonymous or how secretive you're going about it, people have a knack for finding out, making assumptions and growling over it. If you don't like someones behavior, just take a deep breath and if you need a venue to rant, use a trusted friend - not a public channel/page, not your FC chat etc.

[ShoggMommy]

I do not know what happened, but what's with all the negativity recently? 

 

Why can't we all just SMILE and hug and be happy and get along well, despite differences. People have differences, even twins aren't the exact same, but that doesn't mean you can't get along. :<

 

 

This is so incredibly true of the internet I think at this current time. I think with increased anonymity it has created a sense of 'I don't have to be accountable for my actions'. It's not just on tumblr, it seems to be everywhere. It's rather unfortunate but I think the best way to combat it is to have fun regardless, to be positive, and not engage.

[Sorora]

It's a shame that people are acting this way on their blog instead of confronting them nicely about it.  

 

Everyone has differences with people, but despite anything that happens in game, everyone deserves a little bit of OOC respect in the sense that we all play this game, and no one deserves to have their name slandered over tumblr.  That being said, I don't really use tumblr, so I never see anything malicious when I do look through posts.

 

Perhaps then, if you see anything, rather than posting about it on the RPC (even if it's just a general posting), try to have a polite conversation with said people.  Most things can be worked out that way, I found. ^^

 

There has been so much negativity in general, and I've seen it here too so I also have been kinda shyed away from here, as well other forms like tumblr so I can form my own opinions of people.

 

It's not just the people with a lot of followers who get bashed either, it's sometimes some of the lesser knowns too.  I've seen that happen in game a lot.

 

TLDR!

Let's all get along! =D

[Michikyou]

The intentions of the post from what i understand is that people aren't getting away with furthering drama or talking about it more on tumblr compared to what they think they are. Certain things have happened on the RPC and people have gone to tumblr to flame that person instead of acting like rational adults in the situation. Sure, someone does something you don't like - They didnt publicly attack you did you? because tumblr is public.

 

The person you -are- attacking (if you are) can read what you are saying and cyber bullying and slander is ILLEGAL.

[Dravus]

The person you -are- attacking (if you are) can read what you are saying and cyber bullying and slander is ILLEGAL.

 

Just a note but whilst this is technically true very little is actually done to enforce it. Most people don't bother reporting it since even if it is taken seriously the legal chaos isn't something a lot of people want to endure.

 

Laws also differ from country to country and the internet isn't very well regulated in general. I suspect that those responsible realise this and thus act out because they can, essentially, count on getting away with it in many cases.

[ShoggMommy]

The person you -are- attacking (if you are) can read what you are saying and cyber bullying and slander is ILLEGAL.

 

Just a note but whilst this is technically true very little is actually done to enforce it. Most people don't bother reporting it since even if it is taken seriously the legal chaos isn't something a lot of people want to endure.

 

Laws also differ from country to country and the internet isn't very well regulated in general. I suspect that those responsible realise this and thus act out because they can, essentially, count on getting away with it in many cases.

 

I actually dealt with slander on tumblr, and I can attest that they will do nothing about it. I reported it, explained the situation. And I got messages back stating "Tumblr cannot say what Slander is, so we will not police our users' content in this regard." And said for me to take it up with the police themselves.

[Michikyou]

The person you -are- attacking (if you are) can read what you are saying and cyber bullying and slander is ILLEGAL.

 

Just a note but whilst this is technically true very little is actually done to enforce it. Most people don't bother reporting it since even if it is taken seriously the legal chaos isn't something a lot of people want to endure.

 

Laws also differ from country to country and the internet isn't very well regulated in general. I suspect that those responsible realise this and thus act out because they can, essentially, count on getting away with it in many cases.

 

I actually dealt with slander on tumblr, and I can attest that they will do nothing about it. I reported it, explained the situation. And I got messages back stating "Tumblr cannot say what Slander is, so we will not police our users' content in this regard." And said for me to take it up with the police themselves.

I don't think that justifies people actually doing it. ._.;

[ShoggMommy]

The person you -are- attacking (if you are) can read what you are saying and cyber bullying and slander is ILLEGAL.

 

Just a note but whilst this is technically true very little is actually done to enforce it. Most people don't bother reporting it since even if it is taken seriously the legal chaos isn't something a lot of people want to endure.

 

Laws also differ from country to country and the internet isn't very well regulated in general. I suspect that those responsible realise this and thus act out because they can, essentially, count on getting away with it in many cases.

 

I actually dealt with slander on tumblr, and I can attest that they will do nothing about it. I reported it, explained the situation. And I got messages back stating "Tumblr cannot say what Slander is, so we will not police our users' content in this regard." And said for me to take it up with the police themselves.

I don't think that justifies people actually doing it. ._.;

 

It's not meant to justify, rather, I'm saying it's a screwed up thing and people shouldn't treat others like that. It's -wrong-. And it's very unfortunate sites aren't doing their job and are doing the whole... Well...

 

 

'Hands off' sort of thing with how they handle their site. But I digress, people should be nicer! It actually may put a smile on someone's face if you (the generic you) were nice and told them something nice that day instead of lambasting them or talking crap about a community in a public forum.

[No Longer Exists]

*Peeks out from under his hat*

 

It is human nature to want to be recognized. We all do it in our own way, personalized by specific learned behaviors. We may not want to be famous (though, there is strong evidence that a large chunk of the populace secretly does) but, we do want to be recognized in some way. It is perfectly natural and normal. That being said, the internet allows the less self-assured to find that recognition anonymously which leads to these behaviors we're speaking of.

 

There's another important factor here as well, humans learn from each other. In olden times, this was evidenced by how towns developed dialects and communal moralities. The internet has effectively connected the entire world together and now everyone learns behaviors from everyone else. In that sort of massive environment, especially so in the context that the internet is still a frontier with very lax supervision, terribad behaviors will grow like weeds. As long as someone is doing it, someone else will assume that it's okay. Monkey see, Monkey do.

 

However.....

 

On this particular subject, it concerns me greatly that we can make such statements as "If you do X (X being something we don't like) then you don't belong here. Exclusion is in no way a means of positive change, it's simply avoiding the issue. I'd like to think that we want to be better than that, it's the impression I've gotten from discussions about the recent negativity and RPing.

 

There was a phrase going round the net a while back and I'm sure it's still in use today in some respect, but it exemplifies what I'm talking about here. "Go die in a fire"

 

Widely used as a means of expressing hate for another human being, this always made me sad to see because I cannot believe that we, an enlightened people, could condone actually saying to someone "I hope you die violently and painfully." over things like differences of opinion, political affiliation, and worse yet, recreational hobbies (See: Gaming). 

 

 

 

 

Back to the subject at hand.

 

A blog is defined as a website or web page owned or operated by a single individual or small group and is typically written in an informal or conversational style.

 

It's not public forum, per se. While the blog IS available for the public to see, it is essentially (and originally) a form of diary where ones thoughts, feelings, likes, dislikes, and individual interests can be chronicled. There's no filter in a diary, there's also no actual malice in a diary because it's just a bunch of text. In certain instances, the writer might act on something they said in their blog but the keyword here is -might-. We are not the Thought Police. We have no right to dictate an individual's feelings, ideas, or inner most workings and I, for one, am appalled by the idea that we are.

 

Judge not, lest ye be judged thyself.

 

Which brings me to the final point I'd like to make, because this post is long enough as is. Why go looking for trouble? This is kiddie drama. Who cares what Person B said in their blog or tumblr or facebook or skyped to a friend. They're upset, they're using a social acceptable outlet to release stress. Don't like it? Don't look. Have a heaping plate of self-esteem because we're all awesome people and what one person or a small group of people in the vacuum of netspace has to say doesn't actually mean squat unless you let it. I've been actually -attacked-, my business has been the subject of Doxxing, false, fraudulent reviews were posted that dropped my star rating from 5 to 1.5, I had pictures of my family stolen from my facebook by someone I thought was my friend and re-posted to public forums where they were openly criticized.

 

 

But at the end of the day, it's the internet. My business didn't go belly up, my information was secured, and I have enough self-respect to see that what a bunch of "super-cool" nicknames had to say didn't actually matter at all. I love my family and they love me. Life goes on, it's going to be okay.

 

Cheers

 

-Black Hat