Really struggling (Mateus)

[Telin Zulin]

A little background I played a little bit in stormblood and coming back on a fresh character. 

The problem is the lalafell race is really the only race I kinda wanna play its the one I like the best, however Im always seeing post and even in my test run I could not be taken seriously in rp or people would just flat out refuse too. Its really made me discouraged and having a hard time sticking with something. I keep thinking of going with Highlander just to say forget it, but I always feel like Im gimping myself by not actually playing what i really want to and even have a nice little backstory for him. 

 

 

[Tristan Carver]

It's not just Lalafell that have this issue.  It took me months to get involved with any Rp and I have over 20 years experience.  I had to reach out to numerous people OOC on here, in game and discord before I finally found some people who were accepting and not totally inclusive with their Rp.

 

I had the same experience on Balmung when I played during HW peak.  I tried several characters thinking it was something I has done wrong.  Turns out the Rp "community" isn't so much a community as it is a whole bunch of tiny factions that tend to keep to themselves.  Personal experience, of course.  

 

That said I'm quite happy with the Rp I have now.  Keep looking, talk to people in tells and DMs.  There's a place for your Lalafell.  

Edited August 16, 2019 by Tristan Carver

[Orianna Chant]

Man if I was active with my crystal characters I'd offer to help connect you. 

 

That said,  the best advice I can give is its not your character.  It just takes a bit of hitting your head against a wall to find a group to get into.  I'd suggest finding public events and throw yourself into them. Interact with who you can and eventually it'll just click. 

[Tarra]

I'm in the same boat as Tristan on this, in that it takes a huge amount of effort to find steady RP in FFXIV. I also have more than 20 years experience, but I kept coming across RPers who flaked out on me, ghosted off, or ended up as once-offs. It took a couple of months (this last time) to find a few people I enjoy RPing with and I'm really happy I kept at it to find them.  I still reach out trying to find more people to connect with, but it's not a fast, or easy process like it is in other RP communities. 

 

I know it can be discouraging, and I've honestly cried from the sheer frustration of it, going so far as to quit a few times in the past. This time I decided to dig in because I really enjoy FFXIV as a whole and getting solid RP would be awesome.  I've set up a routine of hitting a few events a week my character would attend and working on becoming a regular, while also forcing myself to interact with a new person each time.  When folks put up ads here and on discord, I send messages to the ones that share a similar RP style and have characters that read as if they have story potential with mine.

I've tried to pinpoint why the largest RP community across the MMO platform seems to have so many seemingly transient and finicky RPers, but I stopped worrying about it and kept swimming through them. The gems will show themselves to you eventually, I'm learning.

Stick to what you enjoy so that when you do start attracting like-minded players, they're liking you for what you enjoy. I wish you the best of luck and hope you find fun.

 

[Branson Thorne]

Yeah, TBH you're experiencing a double dose of it. Lala's in general are seldom taken serious, but you can also thank your fellow non-serious Lala RPers for that as well as most tend to play over cutesy cuddly characters. Add in the fact that it's already hard enough finding lasting, long-term RP and yeah, I can understand why it's a rough time for you. I don't have much advice that hasn't already been said, but if you want to RP (this goes for anyone in the topic here) feel free to add me on Discord and lets set something up!

 

Discord ID: SicketySix#7204

[FarsideFox]

I am probably repeating the same advice  already given here. But I just want stress, regardless of what the "general" opinion may be of a race or type of character this should NOT dissuade you from playing what truly inspires you. I've done it to myself, not playing a character concept that really excited me because of what I thought other people would think.. and it usually ended up with me resenting my own choice. If you have a Lalafell character that gets those creative gears turning then play that, you will, with patience find people who will take the character as seriously as you want them to. 

 

I'm somewhat a returning player - when I first tried FFXIV I played a lalafell and found a pretty awesome FC, my Lalafell while cute, was a brilliant and intense little character. The people I roleplayed with took that character as a serious character (though like all characters she had her quirks), granted I was  and still am pretty ignorant of how any of the races may be perceived by the community and maybe that's a blessing in disguise.

 

Play what inspires - sometimes that's hard (for me anyways) because if other people look down on what you're passionate about it can be painful. But I think its the best way to find the people who will also respect and engage with you for roleplay.

 

Best of luck to you!

Edited August 17, 2019 by FarsideFox

[Kirakira]

Maybe some silly advice from me here, but you should 100% play what makes you happy.

 

i made a Lala friend the other day, and he was super fun to RP with. He wasn’t a little cutesy character, and he was really nice. We’re friends now, and if I didn’t have some real life things to attend to, I would’ve gone on a little RP adventure with him and some friends we made for more interactions.

 

The good people are out there. Sometimes you have to wade through a little mud, but you’ll get to where you wanna be with a little persistence. It’ll be 3x as worth it, because you’ll be happier. Those who matter don’t mind what race you are.

[Dravus]

I'm not the sort to mince words so to be blunt, FFXIV's RP community is at times not a particularly pleasant one. It can be very difficult to get involved with something meaningful without first having to endure a series of bitter disappointments. I enjoy the game well enough, though if RP alone served as my interest then I would have ditched FFXIV years ago. I've been playing since the days of ARR and although I've encountered some brilliant people that motivate me to stick around it took a lot of effort and luck to encounter them.

 

The key is to be persistent. A lot of people who claim to desire RP will, unfortunately, mess you around. I've had people chat excitedly for hours about their plans only for nothing to ever manifest. I've had people approach me, claim to be interested in my character and then vanish the moment I made it clear that I was not interested in engaging in ERP with them. I've had people swear up and down that they like to adhere to the game's lore only to have them suddenly unload some weird, implausible scenario upon my character. I've had people invest in mutual character story-lines for weeks or even months at a time only to one day vanish abruptly because they found someone different to interact with. I've had people suddenly stop interacting with me because they found out that I was British. (!?) The list goes on.

 

As the posts above suggest, it isn't an isolated problem. Even now, whenever I try to expand my network of contacts it feels like an uphill battle. For every new, lasting connection I make there's half a dozen failures. It's easy to feel as though you're the one who is to blame. That you're doing something wrong. Yet in reality, that often isn't the case - a lot of role-players are just not particularly stable, reliable or pleasant individuals when it comes to FFXIV. You have to wade through a lot of bad to get to the good.

 

Though it isn't a completely hopeless situation. The good does exist. You'll eventually find like-minded individuals to hang around with. You have to be very proactive and typically also have to be the one to initiate things. Which can admittedly be exhausting at times.

 

As for your chosen race? Go for what makes you happy. Anyone who immediately brushes you off because you choose to play a Lalafell isn't worth your time in the first place.

[Vaz]

Do what you want, be proactive, and eventually you'll find people you mesh with.  Search for FCs, linkshells, and Discords that match your preferences.  When you find someone whose RP (or whose OOC opinions on RP) are to your liking, chat with them and get their recommendations of other people/groups you might enjoy.

[Faye]

Changing your character to cater to others isn't going to fix your problems. You'll end up with a character that's forced and uninspired which will be even less enticing to others, meanwhile you're not having as much fun just so that you can interact with people who didn't appreciate your Lalafell, which, frankly, probably isn't the best demographic. Role-play what you want and what makes you happy! If you're having issues getting others involved, just make sure your character is approachable and your RP is fun and interesting for others. You may need to put some work into reaching out to others, networking, and finding RP groups and events, and even then it's just the matter of looking until you find the people who "click" with you. Sorry you've been struggling and best of luck finding some great RP!

Edited August 19, 2019 by Faye

[Kieron Lohengrin]

On 8/16/2019 at 8:32 AM, Telin Zulin said:

A little background I played a little bit in stormblood and coming back on a fresh character. 

The problem is the lalafell race is really the only race I kinda wanna play its the one I like the best, however Im always seeing post and even in my test run I could not be taken seriously in rp or people would just flat out refuse too. Its really made me discouraged and having a hard time sticking with something. I keep thinking of going with Highlander just to say forget it, but I always feel like Im gimping myself by not actually playing what i really want to and even have a nice little backstory for him. 

 

 

 

We should start with the basics. Who is your lalafell character and what is he like? What's his background and what does he do / how does he behave day-to-day?

[Ryslo Suramlo]

As you can tell by my Avatar I play a lalafell and have been for sometime! I think you'll find that if your presistant you'll manage to navigate your way through all the filters people place upon the race. In fact the more I engage people the less resistance I've found - You just have to keep at it and fight against the stereotype placed upon them and work it into your advantage!

[Telin Zulin]

Just a update I finally bogged down and just stuck with my lalafell character and have already made some truely wonderful rp buddies   dont regret it one bit

[Galeteya]

On 8/22/2019 at 2:24 AM, Telin Zulin said:

Just a update I finally bogged down and just stuck with my lalafell character and have already made some truely wonderful rp buddies   dont regret it one bit

AWESOME. I was just going to post that in the RP community I'm involved in, we have a few Lalas. One is a masterful merchant and the other is a peak textiles designer. Both are a blast to RP with and neither are the "overly cutesy cuddly" type. We hold public events in our mansion on Mateus every Tues/Sat, but the bar is open pretty much 24/7 and everyone enjoys walk-up RP. If you're interested at all, I'm sure everyone would love to meet your Lala and you'd be taken seriously :). Shoot me a message if you want an invite! If not, I'm so happy you found some good RP buddies. Happy writing!